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boyfriend who continues to break promises and act single

I have a boyfriend I have been dating for 8 months and he says he bought a ring and wants to marry me I am mad at him for telling me about the ring is squashed to romance aspect.  Most of all he is on probation for 11 months for a dui and he is not allowed in any place they serve alcohol and he has been acting single and went out last night without me and he isnt supposed to go out because of his probation and he broke his promise to me by doing so. I am mad, we have had trouble in the past from him going to bars and other women and the lies and other women and ph calls and the drinking and the list just goes on and on... I love him but I am tired of his lack of respect for me and my daughter, he is acting like a single guy not a guy in love who wants to get married... what do I do?
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Re: boyfriend who continues to break promises and act single

  • This guy sounds pretty crappy to me. I don't know your whole story here, but its only been 8 months and he is acting badly to you. Get out now while it is easier! you have a DD and do you really want this guy around?? If he is already lying and other women?? He isn't a keeper. You may think so for some odd strange crazy reason.... But he sounds like he is more trouble than he is worth.. Even if you didn't have a DD..

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  • edited December 2013
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  • So....why are you with this guy?
    Anniversary
  • Someone who is lying, talking to other women and drinking while on probation - all in the space of eight months - is not going to change. This is who he is. Is that good enough for you and your daughter? I don't think so. Break up with him and find someone trustworthy. It's not worth wasting any more time on a lier and cheater.
  • All of what pp's said. Please, go, now.
  • You dump him.

    Unless of course you want to teach your daughter that it's fine to be with an irresponsible man who treats you like crap.
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  • At 8 months in, he should still be on his best be on his best behavior. Do you really need to wait around to find out how much worse it can get?
  • Put your dd first here. This is NOT a good guy. You're seeing loud and clear who he is. He is not a keeper. Be smart about this.
    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

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  • Woah!  dump him!  He won't change after you get married.
  • At 8 months in, he should still be on his best be on his best behavior. Do you really need to wait around to find out how much worse it can get?


    Ha ha, what if this is his best behavior. 

    OP, this guys isn't husband and father material. 

  • Yea, OP, you need to drop this guy like a bad habit. This is not someone you want in your DD's life, let alone your own. He sounds like a first class grade a douchebag.
  • A shortlist of things seriously wrong with this man:

    1) Says he wants to propose after a mere 8 months of dating.
    2) Is on probation for DRUNK DRIVING.
    3) Actively DEFIES his probation to go out drinking, which shows that he is neither serious about moving forward from the event nor very smart. This also shows that he gives no thought to the future of your relationship, his own job/future prospects, or your daughter's safety.
    4) In a measly 8 months he has already proven to be reckless, selfish, and not trustworthy.

    None of this says 'winner' or 'smart bet' to me.  
  • I'm usually one who tries to look for the brighter side of things but I can't find one in this situation. Based on how long you have been dating him, he's obviously not the father of your daughter. If he was, I could see trying to stick things out to make them work for her sake.

    Ask yourself this, 20 years from now, if your daughter came to you and told you that she was dating a guy who was like your BF and treated her the way your BF is treating you, what would you tell her?

  • This is a real question?

    Honey, get another one.  This one's shit, find a new one.
  • Thank you everyone!! I had a good Christmas with him sort of he turned into jeckle and hyde, I was called a bitch first thing christmas morning and had to put on a fake smile which I was not thrilled about and then when it all ended he dumped toilet water on me in an arguement which I told him to get out of my parents house! He disrespected my dad and daughter by yelling and arguing and raising his voice it was so humiliating, not to mention I stood there covered in toilet water in front of my kid and father, what a jerk I told him to take a hike took him to the train and dropped him off I didn't even look back.  Now he is texting me and leaving me voicemails of sappy songs playing and leaving me mushy text messages.... He asked me are you gonna throw our love away over this? You bet your sweet butt I am!!! after everything he has done I just can't take anymore. I am a wonderful loving giving person and I can't seem to find a decent guy, I have tried not even looking and I live in such a tiny town there are not many men here but I am ok being alone cause I would rather be alone than standing in the kitchen at my parents house the morning after christmas covered in TOILET WATER
  • I posted reply, not sure if you all can read it!! Didn't think it could get worse but sadly it did
  • Yes he should still be on good behavior!
  • Congratulations on giving him the ditch!
  • edited December 2013
    The title of your post says it all.

    This is a man who is NO man.

    Run like hell and thank your lucky stars you are doing so. He isn't for you, to put it politely.

    Therapy for you and stat: you need to find out why you thought a guy like this was marriage material.

    I am guessing also he is a full blown alc; this is in addition to having the morals of an alleycat. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
  • Wait. I need to know more about this toilet water incident.

    How did that even happen? How did that happen in the KITCHEN??? Was it used toilet water? Clean toilet water from the back of the tank? Were you dating a feces tossing monkey of some sort?

    How the hell do you get toilet water thrown at you?
    image

    Chronically hilarious - you'll split your stitches!
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  • edited January 2014
    I am confused about the toilet water. Is this somebody's idea of some kind of elaborate bad joke?

    I want some kind of backstory.

    That you were interested in a drunk and troublemaker and all around shithead makes me wonder about you. There ARE higher forms of life on the foodchain -- either you be one of them or find one of them to date.
  • Holy Fuk, dang girl!!! Never look back! What a nasty prik dirt ball. Toilet water, really? Ooh, I would have let my Dad kick his azz... Glad you kicked him out and keep it that way. I don't know what this guys deal is, but keep him out of your life. You will find a guy out there, the right guy. I really think there is one out there for all of us and just be patient. Try not to allow yourself to end up with another jerk and proceed with caution. Ask yourself next time, would I be happy if my daughter had a guy like this? Then go from there. Good luck and I am happy to hear you kicked him to the curb. Don't look back! xo

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  • Holy Fuk, dang girl!!! Never look back! What a nasty prik dirt ball. Toilet water, really? Ooh, I would have let my Dad kick his azz... Glad you kicked him out and keep it that way. I don't know what this guys deal is, but keep him out of your life. You will find a guy out there, the right guy. I really think there is one out there for all of us and just be patient. Try not to allow yourself to end up with another jerk and proceed with caution. Ask yourself next time, would I be happy if my daughter had a guy like this? Then go from there. Good luck and I am happy to hear you kicked him to the curb. Don't look back! xo

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  • omg can this get any crazier? Now he is coming back saying he wants to get married?? I am trying to get all my stuff in order so I can move on with my life and I have had terrible luck since I met him. I am just starting finaancially to recouperate from all this.  I am trying to prepare my daughter from college and have a huge step to make on where I am gonna go and live and what I am gonna do with my life from here on out. Any advice? I do love him but I don't think I will ever be able to trust him and he is changing plans all the time and I just feel very unstable with him and any future ideas he brings up to me just terrify me. he finally got a job that he suprisingly is doing well with but almost every time we talk its always about him and when I want to talk most of the time he doesnt have time and is too wrapped up in his world to listen and takes the offensive side and hangs up on me and then doesnt talk to me for a day or more, and I dont think I can take anymore of this.  He is busy hanging out with co workers and going out with them and I feel left out and like an option instead of a priority!
  • he sounds like a bad aid. You just have to rip it off fast!
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