Family Matters
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Who actually is happy with their In Laws??
I think I've successfully managed to secure my place in hell now.
Ugghh... She is jealous! There's always gotta be at least one in the family we don't get along with, right? lol
Yea, well that's the thing....we 'get along', but if she wasn't married into the family, she's probably not someone I would be friends with, if that makes sense. We are polar opposites. Like me, I'm pretty chill and laid back...I prefer to be casual and informal, where for her everything is so 'sex in the city' show off glamorous. For me, that is not how the real world operates, but whatever. I do have to laugh at the constant need for attention and validation though - seeing it in action is entertaining. Anyway, one thing I've learned and accepted - I don't have to 'love' my IL's or even have a close relationship with them, just be cordial and respectful. Which I am
So no guarantee that things would have worked out any differently with your ex-boyfriends.
Hmm, that's strange that your relationship went sour after the wedding, that must have been a surprise. Did they get wound up about something that happened at the wedding? I know my relationships with boyfriends's families could have changed, and I have no regrets about being with my DH, despite his family not liking me. And I knew they didn't like me from the start, so there were no surprises! I just remember what it was like to know my SO's family liked me, and it was such a nice feeling, compared to all the disapproval and guilt-tripping I face now! I hope you and your ILs can work it out, since at one point you did get along. Good luck.
She actively tries to start fights between me and my husband and constantly badmouths both me and my husband. When she isn't doing that she acts like we're both still children and yells and screams at us like such.Last time I checked, my husband and I live in our own house and take care of ourselves. My family refuses to meet her after hearing the stories both of us tell and we've already decided when the time for children rolls around that she isn't going to be a part of their lives.
Everything. LOL.
But seriously, I think the biggest thing that I would change would be how they treat DH. More specifically, they are very cold and detached parents. It's very hard to watch. Even though DH "claims" he is fine by this, I know it still bothers him. I could honestly careless what type of relationship I hold with either of them, I just wish DH had one with them.
I don't know how to word how I feel on mine x_x Mother in law is very kind, hilarious at times, but she can tend to have a pretty loud opinion lol. So sometimes I feel like me sharing mine doesn't matter because she will basically make it out like mine is wrong.
I like saving money, but I also like nice things. So sometimes I'll splurge the extra 10 dollars on a product that is a better quality or looks nicer (I won't go crazy and splurge like... hundreds on better unless it was something that I intend to keep for 10+ years.) So when she steps in with how to do the cheaper option on something I wanted to do my way I kinda find myself biting my tongue to make everyone happy, then I go behind her back and do it my way.
But outside of that, I love her. She's really kind and she's a bit like me. Father in law is pretty great, he's quiet, but hilarious when he talks. So I guess I'm not in too much a bind. Now when we decide to have kids... I might find them different because I don't want his parents OR mine butting in and trying to take over.
The same thing happened to me and my MIL. She started acting cuckoo the minute we announced our engagement and now, after we've been married almost three years, she's in full on competitive mode with me. The poor woman. The last few months she also started badmouthing me to H. Something he put a stop to immediately and I also confronted her about it two days after Christmas. I really couldn't let her get away with it. Now I'm just waiting for her next move, which I believe will be to ask H for money. Then all hell will break loose.
That's funny, that is kind of us, but in a sense opposite, kind of. When we get together, like for xmas, easter etc, I like to get a little dressed up. I'll put on a cute dress and nice heels. I like to look pretty, but I do this with my family too. She will show up like, no make up, ugly clothes, hair looking like a mess. I mean, I get it, they have kids, but you can take the time to put on something nice. She always tells me that I'm in for a real surprise when we have kids, like how I decorate my house and such. I am a very laid back person too, I just care how I look. So what. She is always trying to 1 up me. It is so annoying. No matter what it is, whether it be cooking some sort of recipe, or doing something at home, whatever. I like the girl, we get along mostly, but she is such a 1 upper. Makes her look like a dip shit. I think she was just raised badly...
BUT
He is generous, kind and a fascinating person to talk to about world history. I'm writing a book and he has read and roared through every chapter - he has turned out to be my biggest supporter.
My MIL does things that drive me nuts and I've even complained about her on here before. She takes so many pictures we call there the paparazza Grandma. The way we run our lives, homes and careers are completely opposite and we can clash on that.
BUT
She loves us, all of us, so much and there is no question in her mind that I am wholeheartedly a part of her family. She'll be there for us, and me, no matter what and when I got sick she dropped her life and flew overseas to be here for us.
I've learned not just to accept my inlaws for who they are, but to love them for it. (as I'm hoping they've done with me!)
Chronically hilarious - you'll split your stitches!
I wrote a book! Bucket list CHECK!
http://notesfortheirtherapist.blogspot.co.uk
Seriously!! Exactly! Gets on my nerves. I know I probably won't be able to keep my house spotless as it is now, but I do plan on keeping nice things and keeping it clean. Oh man I remember stopping by her place, dirty nasty clothes everywhere. I mean, you are home every day. Make the kids clean their stuff before you can leave, FOLD your clothes! Put them away. And guess what, they were late to a funeral!! A FUNERAL! Excuse the kids, of course, but they were the closest people to the place. I mean, start getting the kids ready early. I don't have kids yet, I cant wait until we do. But I do plan on being on time. Especially to things you really should never be late to
That's funny, that is kind of us, but in a sense opposite, kind of. When we get together, like for xmas, easter etc, I like to get a little dressed up. I'll put on a cute dress and nice heels. I like to look pretty, but I do this with my family too. She will show up like, no make up, ugly clothes, hair looking like a mess. I mean, I get it, they have kids, but you can take the time to put on something nice. She always tells me that I'm in for a real surprise when we have kids, like how I decorate my house and such. I am a very laid back person too, I just care how I look. So what. She is always trying to 1 up me. It is so annoying. No matter what it is, whether it be cooking some sort of recipe, or doing something at home, whatever. I like the girl, we get along mostly, but she is such a 1 upper. Makes her look like a dip shit. I think she was just raised badly...
I really really hate it when people say stuff like this. Just because (general) you can't keep your house nice with a few kids doesn't mean no one can. Just because you live in sweatpants and t-shirts after having kids doesn't mean everyone will. Just because you are always late after having kids doesn't mean everyone is.
Seriously!! Exactly! Gets on my nerves. I know I probably won't be able to keep my house spotless as it is now, but I do plan on keeping nice things and keeping it clean. Oh man I remember stopping by her place, dirty nasty clothes everywhere. I mean, you are home every day. Make the kids clean their stuff before you can leave, FOLD your clothes! Put them away. And guess what, they were late to a funeral!! A FUNERAL! Excuse the kids, of course, but they were the closest people to the place. I mean, start getting the kids ready early. I don't have kids yet, I cant wait until we do. But I do plan on being on time. Especially to things you really should never be late to
We have one friend who has white carpet and home is always spotless. I don't know how she does it but she does. Good for her, her husband, and her little one. Then we have other friends where their home is always in a state of disarray because of their child. Everyone is different. I don't understand how people can't wrap their heads around that.