Sewilson33

lindsayandjamie · February 2014

I just stalked your chart. Thinking of you xo

LuckyAngel07 · February 2014

My heart hurt for you yesterday when I checked. It's so unfair. ((hugs))

JLyn821 · February 2014

It killed me seeing CD1 on your chart yesterday. I hate this for you.

(((hugs)))

lfk2013 · February 2014

Same as PPs. (hugs)

Sewilson33 · February 2014

Thanks ladies! It was pretty painful Sunday, we kept hoping something would turn up positive but it's just not happening for us.
I'm at a loss of where to go from here. DH and I argued about his SA again on Sunday and Monday. In my opinion he is only thinking about himself right now and not about us or our future family. He wants to push it back again a cycle and I just F--ing flipped. He has been saying this since November. He is very aware that we can not move forward with any other tests of anything at all until this is done.
My yearly OBGYN appt is in March and the exact day AF is due OH WONDERFUL! So I was hoping to have his SA done before that so my Dr and I can chat a bit about his SA and our future plans but Nooooooo.
I don't think he realizes just how much he is hurting me with all of this. He knows how I feel and he knows what I want done... I'm through with arguing about it for now, so right now I am just saying f**ck it to him and to TTC.

Sorry that completely turned into a VENT.

nightmare_of_beauty · February 2014

You feel free to vent any time you need it. I am so sorry for you. Lots of hugs. I'll be thinking of you and hoping YH will get the SA done.

blueeyedblossom · February 2014

I am so sorry. :-( my heart breaks for you.

brij2006 · February 2014

I'm so sorry hun. You know that you can always feel free to vent to us. It is okay to be frustrated with him about the SA.

callitcompulsive · February 2014

LuckyAngel07 said:

My heart hurt for you yesterday when I checked. It's so unfair. ((hugs))

same here.

islandmonkey8 · February 2014

My heart breaks for you @sewilson33. I'm so sorry your husband isn't willing to go get his SA. I understand this is hard for some men, but it's such a simple thing. They don't have to get poked and prodded anywhere near as much as we do. ((Hugs)) I hope your husband comes around to getting things moving forward. We're always here when you need to vent.

sparklingdiamond · February 2014

I am so sorry :-( Lots of hugs to you! And I am sorry your DH isn't being cooperative about the S/A.

mrshall1027 · February 2014

I'm so sorry

I hope your H comes around.

Have you checked on the process of the SA? My H was a little apprehensive about going to get it done, but when I found out he could do it at home and drop it off, he was a lot more comfortable moving forward. I told him I'd go drop it off so they wouldn't even know it was for him. The issue for him was where he had to do the act to collect the sample and handing it over to them. Maybe it's the same for your H...?

Sewilson33 · February 2014

ystaalenburg said:

I'm so sorry I hope your H comes around.

Have you checked on the process of the SA? My H was a little apprehensive about going to get it done, but when I found out he could do it at home and drop it off, he was a lot more comfortable moving forward. I told him I'd go drop it off so they wouldn't even know it was for him. The issue for him was where he had to do the act to collect the sample and handing it over to them. Maybe it's the same for your H...?

I asked about that with my OBGYN office and they said that he has to go to the lab in the hospital which is around the corner from my OB. I guess I'd have to call the lab and see about dropping it off. I'd prefer if HE called but he definitely won't call. The lab/hospital is about a 15 min drive and I don't know the time limits on these things.

wiggyslilsis · February 2014

I am so sorry sewilson. You have every right to be frustrated. I hope that your DH is able to get the SA done soon one way or another. *hugs*

zamboni00 · February 2014

I am so sorry. So sorry. My heart hurts for you.

If it helps, H and I went through a similar time- I wanted to move forward with testing, he thought we just didn't have enough ST.

EVENTUALLY, he came around, and is now beyond 1000% on board. It will happen for your H, too- I'm sorry it's taking so long!

My H was able to do his at home and then drop it off. But he had to drop it off. They wouldn't accept it from me.

I think he had to get it there within 1 hour? Maybe half hour? I don't remember.

The tricky part was that he had an 'appointment' for the drop off. So he had to time it so he dropped it off at the appropriate time, but also not more than x minutes after the deed.

Just in case the whole thing wasn't awkward enough.

PandPMeant2B · February 2014

I'm so sad for you. I really hope you and YH can get on the same page soon and he gets the SA done and over with. Feel free to vent to us anytime. I'm so sorry you're going through this. ((hugs))

blueeyedblossom · February 2014

Sewilson33 said:

ystaalenburg said:

I'm so sorry I hope your H comes around.

Have you checked on the process of the SA? My H was a little apprehensive about going to get it done, but when I found out he could do it at home and drop it off, he was a lot more comfortable moving forward. I told him I'd go drop it off so they wouldn't even know it was for him. The issue for him was where he had to do the act to collect the sample and handing it over to them. Maybe it's the same for your H...?

I asked about that with my OBGYN office and they said that he has to go to the lab in the hospital which is around the corner from my OB. I guess I'd have to call the lab and see about dropping it off. I'd prefer if HE called but he definitely won't call. The lab/hospital is about a 15 min drive and I don't know the time limits on these things.

The time limit is usually 20 minutes. Is it possible to do an at home sperm count test as a practice round for him? Maybe get him a little more comfortable with the process? I know it's not for everyone, but an idea for you nonetheless.

sgautschi · February 2014

I'm so sorry. I'm so frustrated for you, and heartbroken, this is such a shitty situation. I really hope your H comes around soon. I'll be thinking of you, and I'm always here if you need to vent. ((Hugs))

arj14 · February 2014

I'm so sorry.

This totally sucks.

I remember you once wrote a letter to him because it was easier to lay everything out that way - would that be helpful again?

mrshall1027 · February 2014

Sewilson33 said:

ystaalenburg said:

I'm so sorry I hope your H comes around.

Have you checked on the process of the SA? My H was a little apprehensive about going to get it done, but when I found out he could do it at home and drop it off, he was a lot more comfortable moving forward. I told him I'd go drop it off so they wouldn't even know it was for him. The issue for him was where he had to do the act to collect the sample and handing it over to them. Maybe it's the same for your H...?

I asked about that with my OBGYN office and they said that he has to go to the lab in the hospital which is around the corner from my OB. I guess I'd have to call the lab and see about dropping it off. I'd prefer if HE called but he definitely won't call. The lab/hospital is about a 15 min drive and I don't know the time limits on these things.

If I remember correctly, they wanted it dropped of by a certain time in the morning and within 30 minutes of collection. Looks like it's a little different everywhere, but it may be something worth looking into. I knew my H wouldn't call, but he doesn't like calling for anything, so that wasn't that big of an issue for me.

Sewilson33 · February 2014

Thanks for all the love and advice!
I'm definitely going to call the lab and ask... maybe that would be better for him.
@blueeyedblossom we did that test back in Dec and it came back normal for him.
@zamboni00 - that is DH's response too, just not enough ST.

lilliesandvino · February 2014

I'm sorry you're going through this.

zamboni00 · February 2014

So frustrating. I finally showed him my charts and gave him a quick lesson- to show him we had plenty during the FW and he still said not enough- with a smirk.

But as I said, he did eventually get there, and now is planning work travel around possible IUI timing, saying 'after all the stuff you have been through/ go through in this process, I think I can arrange my travel to be where I need to be.'

Total turn around.

FX your H gets there a little quicker than mine!

DangerMuffin23 · February 2014

I'm sorry he's not taking care of his one piece of the puzzle. (And if it's his piece that has a problem you could be having too much sex too close together) I can't say more than that because I know you're already frustrated enough and I'm frustrated for you. I'm sorry this wasn't it for you.

FutureMrsWright2012 · February 2014

Sorry, Sewilson33

That is so frustrating, and I'm sure even harder when DH is not on board with figuring out what's going on.

Sewilson33 · February 2014

Just a little update:

I called the lab and they said they prefer specimen's to be dropped off because they only have a tiny public bathroom to use. We have an hour to get it there and it has to be there between 7:30-8:30 am. An appointment is needed because they only do 2 tests a day (weird). They have availability Friday so hopefully I can talk to DH without killing him by then.

zamboni00 · February 2014

That is great news! I hope that helps your H feel more comfortable about everything!

aggiebug · February 2014

Boo I am sorry

sending lots of hugs and prayers for you and your H.

BeeLu · February 2014

Good update! I hope the talk goes well and he sees the light. Best of luck!

islandmonkey8 · February 2014

I hope he's on board for Friday!

sparklingdiamond · February 2014

I hope he agrees to do it on Friday!

Sewilson33

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