Debt frustration...

mrsseguin · June 2014

I don't post here often, but I lurk a lot and have learned so much from everyone on these boards. DH and I are working on paying off debt and have paid off a lot. We've paid off $52,303 in 3.5 years. We still have $51K to go. We are on track to be out of debt in another 3 years. Yesterday I paid off a credit card. Instead of feeling relief, motivation and happiness, I find myself feeling annoyed, frustrated and depressed. I know long term, it'll be worth all the sacrifice. I find it so hard to look at the positive side of things and always focus on what we have left to pay, what we can't do/spend right now. Maybe this doesn't even make sense what I'm trying to say, I guess I just wanted to vent. Just wondering of others have also felt the same way.

MrsAshleyH10 · June 2014

I've felt this way for a long time. I think about how easy it would be to stop snowballing so much and use the extra money for fun or for a new car. Then I think about the end goal which includes being able to comfortably afford to have children in the future.

I know in the end everything will be worth it, but it's hard to see into the future and believe it is actually going to be real.

uncreatedsnow · June 2014

I track everything and set a lot of goals. Short term like this quarter or this year and longer term goals as well. Seeing the progress of the baby steps really helps my outlook for the future.

I basically have a timeline of goals and that is really what drives me. For example, I was only going to pay X&Y this month but this is the end of a quarter and I saw that if I paid Z too it would put me over $10k paid in the last 18 months. So I pulled the trigger.

It seems like you are doing great. Keep up the awesome work!

jessica490 · June 2014

Congrats on the job well done so far!

Maybe you can give your self a small reward at incremental times just so you have something to look forward to for all the progress you've made thus far. Say once a month you go to your favorite restaurant for dinner, for every $1000 you pay off buy an awesome looking cake from the store, or every other month you take a small day trip even if it's just to the beach or a lake, just to throw a few small ideas out there....it's worth celebrating within reason!

Make a calender showing all your payment due dates and throw some activities on there as well so you have something to look forward to other than just paying a bill

mrsseguin · June 2014

Thank you ladies! It's been a long road. I often will calculate our bills as if we had no debt and it makes me so excited for the day it'll all be gone!

vlagrl29 · June 2014

I know it sucks but it will be so worth it in the end! Keep thinking how much money you will actually have once the debt is gone. That's what made me happy.

Xstatic3333 · June 2014

You are doing so great! I'm really impressed with your payoff rate!

I haven't been there with debt, per se, but I recently undertook a big life change (going back to school to change careers into a tough field that I'm super passionate about) and I remember feeling really, really low right when the whole process was about halfway over. That's when you feel like you've been doing it forever, but still have so far to go. Ditto PP's about allowing yourself small rewards when you hit big increments.

PS because I'm curious, Tyler Seguin fan or married to an actual Seguin?

hoffse · June 2014

Wow that's a lot of money - keep it up!

Honestly sometimes I cheat. I feel guilty for about 3 seconds, and then I realize that it helps me stick to the plan long-term.

Example: this summer we committed to buying virtually nothing that wasn't a necessity (gas, food, etc.) because we're preparing for our first house. Well this morning I got an ebay alert that the last piece of my china was listed on ebay for a craaaaazy good price. I called H, and we bought it. I sort of felt guilty, but we've done really really well so far, and I'm glad I didn't let that deal pass by just for the sake of The Plan.

It's one thing to be really tight and good for a few months. But when you're in it for the long haul (years), you need to allow yourself to take a short break once in awhile. Odds are it really won't get you off track, and it might help you stick to it in the long run.

mana8503 · June 2014

mrsseguin said:
Thank you ladies! It's been a long road. I often will calculate our bills as if we had no debt and it makes me so excited for the day it'll all be gone!

I do this too. I have a break down of our expensives/budgets in excel. I made a tab for "Us Debt Free" I look at it when I need to feel better.

I also agree on small rewards, H needs it more than me. But it's nice to do something fun / nice once in a while.

Wulfgar · June 2014

We are doing the "balancing" act of working on paying off debt while still doing some small things. We have a child so we have a zoo membership and we do eat out a little more than what we really should.

We have had to tell her one Aunt that since we are focused on debt repayment and we don't have a lot of vacation time either we don't do expensive week long vacations other than going to MW's family's summer vacation at a local beach area.

With everything, you have to find the correct balance that fits your goals.

lifeonthehill · June 2014

H and I go on date nights when a student loan gets paid off. That means in 15 months we have had only 7 date nights. We look forward to them so much that it is completely worth it. When I start to feel incredibly frustrated I think about how at the end of all of these financial goals we will finally be able to start trying to have a family. It doesn't hurt to know there will be nearly $1,750 freed up in our budget every month so we can finaly afford our own health ins. among other things.

You are doing an amazing job! Keep at it!

Erikan73 · June 2014

Keep it up. I know it's frustrating. You pay one thing off only to take the money that you were using to pay that bill to apply it to another debt bill. So you get rid of the bill but don't end up with more in your pocket. I keep telling myself there is a light at the end of the tunnel and we will get there and when we do it will be worth it. We won't have to worry about liens or a wages garnished and can really start planning for our future. It's not easy, but just keep looking at the big picture and how far you've already come.

tigerfighter · June 2014

I am going through the same thing. I want to be debt free to be able to focus on my savings goals, but it gets frustrating. Right now I have 3 credit cards with a balance, two with a 0% interest and one with an 14%. I am focusing on the one with the apr but do plan on making sure the 0% are paid before interest hits. My goal is to be completely debt free by tax time. Current balance is $5.4k, with 2.4 on the interest card and the rest on the 0 interest. Though I know it is not very MM, I got a membership to ilovekickboxing, which is $125 a month for unlimited classes. But I enjoy it and go every day I can, which is almost 5 days a week. And I get to interact with people besides my coworkers.

vlagrl29 · June 2014

tigerfighter said:

I am going through the same thing. I want to be debt free to be able to focus on my savings goals, but it gets frustrating. Right now I have 3 credit cards with a balance, two with a 0% interest and one with an 14%. I am focusing on the one with the apr but do plan on making sure the 0% are paid before interest hits. My goal is to be completely debt free by tax time. Current balance is $5.4k, with 2.4 on the interest card and the rest on the 0 interest. Though I know it is not very MM, I got a membership to ilovekickboxing, which is $125 a month for unlimited classes. But I enjoy it and go every day I can, which is almost 5 days a week. And I get to interact with people besides my coworkers.

I think it's totally fine to spend money towards that. I go to a yoga studio and can't imagine not ever going. If it's something you love and you actually go do it. It's better than spending that amount of money eating out every month.

Xstatic3333 · June 2014

vlagrl29 said:

tigerfighter said:

I am going through the same thing. I want to be debt free to be able to focus on my savings goals, but it gets frustrating. Right now I have 3 credit cards with a balance, two with a 0% interest and one with an 14%. I am focusing on the one with the apr but do plan on making sure the 0% are paid before interest hits. My goal is to be completely debt free by tax time. Current balance is $5.4k, with 2.4 on the interest card and the rest on the 0 interest. Though I know it is not very MM, I got a membership to ilovekickboxing, which is $125 a month for unlimited classes. But I enjoy it and go every day I can, which is almost 5 days a week. And I get to interact with people besides my coworkers.

I think it's totally fine to spend money towards that. I go to a yoga studio and can't imagine not ever going. If it's something you love and you actually go do it. It's better than spending that amount of money eating out every month.

I also agree (presuming you're not building debt to do it of course). My Zumba studio is comparable, although my new neighborhood will have a cheaper one

I just budget for it and reduce my "fun" budget accordingly, leaving just enough to see friends from time to time.

vlagrl29 · June 2014

Xstatic3333 said:

vlagrl29 said:

tigerfighter said:

I am going through the same thing. I want to be debt free to be able to focus on my savings goals, but it gets frustrating. Right now I have 3 credit cards with a balance, two with a 0% interest and one with an 14%. I am focusing on the one with the apr but do plan on making sure the 0% are paid before interest hits. My goal is to be completely debt free by tax time. Current balance is $5.4k, with 2.4 on the interest card and the rest on the 0 interest. Though I know it is not very MM, I got a membership to ilovekickboxing, which is $125 a month for unlimited classes. But I enjoy it and go every day I can, which is almost 5 days a week. And I get to interact with people besides my coworkers.

I think it's totally fine to spend money towards that. I go to a yoga studio and can't imagine not ever going. If it's something you love and you actually go do it. It's better than spending that amount of money eating out every month.

I also agree (presuming you're not building debt to do it of course). My Zumba studio is comparable, although my new neighborhood will have a cheaper one I just budget for it and reduce my "fun" budget accordingly, leaving just enough to see friends from time to time.

I'm doing trade out with one of the yoga instructors. I teach her violin lessons and in turn I get yoga for free. We basically don't pay each other. I think it's awesome.

tigerfighter · June 2014

My dad has the one credit card that I can possibly use so I won't add any more debt. So this is now a monthly bill that is budgeted for. I do go, including Saturday mornings at 8:15, I only get two days a week that I can sleep in, so I must really enjoy it for me to give up sleeping in.

Debt frustration...

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