Money Matters
bmo88
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Vent about changing name on accounts after marriage...
Sorry, it's Monday and I am just super annoyed.
I really wish changing your name after marriage didn't have to be so darn complicated. You think it is easy by just going to the SSA and then DMV, but no, you have to change it on every account you have ever had. They require copies of the marriage license, SS card, ids, account statements, signed notarized letters and even medallion signature guarantees!!
This chart pretty much sums it up:
My particular gripe is that I have an account with Vanguard that I would like to start contributing to (I had rolled it over from a previous employer). But in order to do so I have to change my name on it so it matches my bank account (which has my married name). So I had to acquire a medallion signature guarantee(biggest pain in the ass and had to go to 3 banks to find a person), then mail it to them.
First time, I only got a notary signature because I didn't even know what a medallion signature was and the bank wasn't sure either. Then, second time, found the right person, but they used blue ink (instead of black), so they rejected it signature. This time, they have received the forms, but are taking forever to process it.
I am so over this, I just want to contribute to my retirement for goodness sake!! Ugh, I have been married almost 2 years and still haven't changed my name on all my accounts...and this isn't motivating me to do so.
Sorry, vent over. Anyone else have a difficult time updating all of their accounts?
Re: Vent about changing name on accounts after marriage...
I feel you though on medallions. They are such a pain! My mom and I both needed one done for her to transfer stocks to me, and we literally had to have her join my credit union to accomplish it.
I had issues too, most of which were related to the fact that adding my husbands last name caused my full name to no longer "fit" on my SS card, so I had to drop one of my middle names to make it all work, which then caused a whole domino effect of confusion with other organizations. At work I still go by maiden name because I couldn't change my email and it just left people confused when I tried to update it so I gave up.
I also have multiple citizenship, and honestly found it fairly easy (albeit annoying) to update most of my US and UK info. My Brazilian info though? That was a nightmare, and my Brazilian documents like my passport all still show my full maiden name. In order to renew my BR passport (which had expired) and change the name on it, I had to produce documentation that either didn't exist (like a birth certificate from that country, even though I was born in the US and only have a birth registration card) or that could only be attained in person in Brazil (now, how I'm supposed to get those documents without having a valid passport to get into the country is beyond me. Even the guys at the consulate couldn't figure it out). So after months of dealing with red tape I just renewed my passport with my maiden name--found out later that it's fairly common, but I figure next time I go visit family I can try to sort through it all.
Sorry didn't realize how long that got---long story short, I feel your pain!
Lol, I have to admit. I have always PLANNED on changing my maiden name to my DH's last name, but have still not done it because of what a hassle it will be. And we got married almost two years ago! Heck, I'm just complaining about going to both the SS office and the DMV.
Oh! But it has to be on different days because the DMV, at least where I live, needs me to wait at least 24 hours for SS to do whatever they do. So, basically, I have to take TWO half days off from work JUST to change my name and get a new ID/driver's license.
Just to add to the fun, although I have a copy of my marriage license, I was never given the original. I assumed it would be mailed to me, but I guess not. I got married out of state so, to get an original, I need to pay a fee and send a notarized letter. So aggravating.
I know I really just need to bite the bullet and get it all done. It's not like putting it off makes it easier, lol.
Thanks, @Xstatic3333. I'll try that then.
This is how naïve I was. I went to the DMV a few months after we got married...I had to go anyway...and brought my little ole' copy of my marriage certificate to change my name and get a new driver's license. I was promptly told how mistaken I was. Looking back, it was probably a funny conversation:
DMV: Oh, no. First you need to change your name with Social Security.
Me: Okay. Do I write to them or something and send them a copy of my marriage certificate?
DMV: No, you have to go to their office.
Me (incredulously): Their office?!? There's a Social Security office in New Orleans? (No idea SS even had local offices, lol)
She had gone to renew her driver's license and they required her to bring in proof of identity but since the names didn't match they wouldn't let her renew her license. I went down with her to the SS office and you should have seen the look on the clerk's face when we told her we were there to change my mom's name--30+ years after the fact!
@TravelJunkie1234, that is hilarious! I love it. And I have been using his name socially. In fact, my mom...MY MOM...who knows I haven't officially changed my name, wrote us a check for our Christmas present to "Shortnsassy husband's last name and husband first and last name". We also had some wedding checks written that way. Luckily, my bank has been pretty cool about processing checks written that way, since my husband is on that account as well...even though my name is still my maiden name. As an aside, my mom wasn't sending me any hint, I know she just forgot I haven't changed it yet.
It's so cute, too. She adores my husband's last name. His last name is also a word that corresponds to one of her favorite activities. Like, if she loved to garden, and his name was Gardner.
Not so much name related, but I had an ex-BF whose mother was born in Costa Rica and married an American. She lived in the USA for 20 years and never applied for citizenship...until she took a trip back home, there was some tangle with her paperwork, and it took an extra week to get it untangled before she could come back to the US. She made sure to get her U.S. citizenship after that!
I had to make a spur of the moment decision about it, and ended up keeping all the names, but reducing my mom's maiden name to just an initial. When I went to go change my driver's license they couldn't even fit half of my name in their database, so my DL literally just says First-Maiden-Last
I also got good advice from a friend that has 3 children and they tried the hyphenated last name with the three children, they are still in school and they have huge issues.
Wow! Yeah, any man who thinks he can dictate to me what my name should be, would also be in for a rude awakening.
My cousin hyphenated her name and I know she has told me she is really sorry she did that. Her DH is from Spain, so they often travel internationally, and she continually has problems because her name is too long to be entered properly for her plane tickets. So her "ticket name" doesn't perfectly match her "passport name".