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Spinoff from charitable giving post - panhandling
Not so much MM as just curious, but I was wondering what others do when they encounter panhandling. Do you usually/sometimes/never give something? Do you sometimes give food, but not cash?
I was thinking about it because at lunchtime...yet again...a person was asking for money outside the Wendy's I went for lunch. But it doesn't matter where I go for lunch, more often than not, I'll have someone beg me for money somewhere on my short walks. Where I work in NOLA, both for my f/t and my p/t job, I am in an area RIFE with panhandlers. In addition to roaming around, they are also literally at every corner on the road cars have to take to get to the freeway from the Downtown/Warehouse districts.
I personally rarely give anything, but I don't ignore them and am always polite in my refusal. Unless I'm harassed and asked a second time, then I use my super bitch tone, tell them no again and ignore anything else said. My attitude is it's not my job to help support grown, random adults I know nothing about.
There are rare occasions when I've made exceptions. For example, there was a guy at a gas station (not an employee) working his butt off to fill people's gas tanks and wash their windows. Obviously he was hoping for tips, but he never actually asked for money and I was impressed by that along with his hard work. I've also given people food if I happened to have something extra with me, though that is only people who might stop me in a parking lot. I do ignore the street corner/freeway on ramp people. They sometimes slow down already slow traffic and I won't be a party to that.
Re: Spinoff from charitable giving post - panhandling
I had a friend on FB post that people living on the street can use a new pair of socks. I might try to take a pair around with me this winter in case I encounter anyone that can use them.
One occasional exception is a Boston program called "Spare Change News." Homeless people can purchase papers for 25 cents and sell them for a dollar. A man at my old church worked his way out of homelessness thanks in part to this program.
We don't really have many panhandlers in our small town, so we only really encounter them on vacation. We will sometimes give somebody a few bucks, especially if they are the industrious type--such as the guy mentioned above w/ the newspapers. We encountered a man in San Francisco selling papers this way, and we gave him money. In St. Louis, we offered a man outside of Cheesecake Factory our leftovers and he was very grateful and sat down right there and started eating. It made me feel really grateful that I could do that for him.
I don't ignore them and I am not rude to them, unless they are harassing or scaring me--then I will ignore them and just get away. I don't stop for the people on the side of the road because I am usually by myself in my car and I don't feel comfortable doing that. Really, I try to be respectful of everybody, regardless of their position in life. I suppose if I lived somewhere that I encountered this every day, it might change my perspective a little bit, but I would still try to be polite and respectful, even if I had to say no a lot more.
I don't really think GoFundMe is the same; I mean, I don't necessarily contribute to random strangers on GoFundMe but if it's somebody I know or something in the community that I know is legit, I have contributed. Although, GoFundMe keeps about 18% of the donations, so it's always better to give directly to the person if possible.
No judgement to anyone who doesn't. Persoally, I just think it's the right thing to do. I hope I never find myself in a dire situation, but I would hope that someone would offer to help me. I like to think we all have the responsibility to take care of each other. Yes, I'm a bleeding heart. I'm okay with that.
@orangehills and @hoffse both mentioned nearby food banks and shelters. Those are good points and also part of what I find irritating. In the same area I referred to above, there is a large homeless shelter attached to a church. I'm assuming they help with food also.
I once had a woman stop me in a parking lot who had supposedly just moved to town, had just enough to pay first month's rent, but now no food for her kids and she was searching for anything she could get to feed them. She also asked me if I knew of any food pantries she could walk to. Maybe it was all a con in the hopes I would offer money, but I don't think so. I was really struck by the fact that she only asked for food in addition to asking about a food pantry.
On a fortuitous note, I had just finished an oatmeal sampling gig a couple days early and had tons of individually wrapped oatmeal packs in my car. I gave her a bunch of those in a grocery store bag. She was so surprised and even choked up a little thanking me. I also gave her directions to that church and she even repeated them back to me to make sure she understood how to get there.
And I guess that is the bottom line for me. If I feel like I am genuinely helping someone in my little way while they are going through a hard time, I'm happy to help. But the usual spiel is just a request for money...who knows if they even need it, who knows what they will spend it on. Those are my polite, but firm, no's.
Plus I used to manage a big gas station and we had a few regular panhandlers that frequented our station. I would politely ask them to leave any time I saw them outside asking our customers for money. But, when they collected enough money from wherever they went, they would return to make their purchases. Every once in awhile it was food...but 90% of the time it was cheap beer or cigarettes, which made me just even more jaded about panhandling.
Honestly I feel like the chances of a person attacking him in broad daylight for his wallet are slim but at the same time a poor woman was assaulted on a side street on her lunch break last year. It is not a deserted area by any means, so it's scary.
I will give food, but not money. I really don't encounter many homeless, but if I had food or clothing to give I would do it. If I was outside of a food place I'd probably offer them a meal also.
Little story: My mom occasionally works in the inner city in bad area and she is a very giving person so she would regularly buy food for the homeless and talk to them outside of the grocery stores she was working in. One day a woman who was high on drugs tried to attack and rob my mom and the homeless men she bought food for intervened and saved her from being robbed and potentially hurt. So I truly believe what goes around comes around.
I know a lot of people mention homeless shelters and food banks, but usually there are not nearly enough of those places to feed every one in need.
If I have it to give, I will.
When panhandlers have dogs, it actually serves two purposes (at least where I live). It makes the person more sympathetic and it also makes them less likely to be arrested. Because, if a police officer arrests a person with an animal, they have to coordinate with Animal Services (not sure of the exact name) or have somewhere to put the animal until Animal Services can retrieve it. It certainly won't stop or impede the police for a major crime but, for something minor like panhandling, they just don't want to be bothered with all that.
Over the last few years, groups of supposedly homeless teenagers/early 20s have been cropping up in the French Quarter. These groups always have at least one dog with them. Not that I have ever had an incident, but I find them scary and creepy. Because it is always a group of at least 4 people and often 6-8, not just a single person pan handling. And most of them just have this angry air about them and cold, dead eyes. At least they aren't usually standing. They just panhandle from wherever they are sitting on the sidewalk.
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My previous job was as an addiction counselor with the homeless/no-low income individuals in a rather large city. When starting that job I had no idea what the resources were in the city. Within a few weeks it was rather apparent that any and all basic needs could be met by many of the resources. Based on this I knew that most of the pan handlers in the city were trying to get money for things that food stamps didn't cover and their wants(i.e. fast food, substances, specific clothing, feminine hygiene items). I would also have some clients tell me this too. Many people believe that homeless people can just go get a job. However, many are severely mentally ill and waiting to be approved for disability.
Now when I have someone asking for money I let them know of the resources around the city. I used to keep lists of hot meals and food banks on me. For those who are truly homeless, food banks can be tricky since they don't have anywhere to prepare their food. Also, many are missing or don't have teeth. This makes granola bars and snack bars very difficult for them to eat.
I do know that many shelters are in need of socks and underwear as well as feminine hygiene products.