Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
NER: I need hugs
I am not comfortable postign the details but DH and I are going through some pretty heavy shyte right now... I could use some "vibes" and some hugs if you have some to spare.
I know Im not posting much in the past week, and probably for a while... I am having a hard time focusing on anything else right now (even my DittoPod isnt distracting me!)
I am planning to make an appt for a therapist for us on my lunch break. Vibes for the therapist covered by our ins being a good match too 
I think we will be ok and will work through this. I am falling apart and dont think I can do it without help though.
thanks.
PS how the heck does one get recommendations for a marriage counselor without telling friends and family that, well, you need reccs for a marriage counselor?
Re: NER: I need hugs
Oh, PGH, I'm sorry! Lots of hugs and good thoughts to you.
Lots of hugs and prayers/good thoughts. Can you ask on your local board for recs? You could do the it's for a friend/cousin/etc. if you don't want to share with them.
<a href="http://www.thenest.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Home D
Many zombie hugs for you. I hope everything ends up OK.
I'm so sorry, pgh.
Whatever it is, I hope you and your H are able to work it out together.
As for the marriage counselor recs, I'd start by getting a list of covered people via your insurance first, and then go from there.
oh no I am so sorry! (((hugs)))
Did you do pre-marital counseling? If you don't wanna use that person again you could ask for other recommendations from them.
This is a GREAT site that is non-religious based - although people who work as counselors may also be afiliated with a religious group. You can do a search for counselors in your area. We did our pre-martial counseling through them.
http://www.prepare-enrich.com/indexm.cfm
There arent too many people in my immediate vicinity and I dont think I could be believable wtih it. If the names I found from my insurance dont 'fit' then I will try that, though. I am not up for talking about it with people I know IRL, kwim?
Dude... I'm so sorry. I'm here for you if you wanna "talk"
zombie hugs
As for the question... ask a friend who wouldn't freak out. Maybe someone on your local?
Or maybe ask your doctor for a referral?
Hugs.
You could check out a unitarian church. Some deal with marriage counseling and are totally cool with the atheists.
Or, you could call your doctor if you have a trusting relationship with her/him.
You could also check out the state board for the specialty. I think most online have everyone who's certified and lists awards (if they matter to you)
Absolutely. If you need me to, I'll go to your local board and ask for a friend, so you can see the responses. Seriously. Just let me know if you want me to if the insurance thing doesn't pan out.
<a href="http://www.thenest.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Home D
Many, many positive thoughts and hugs being sent your way, PGH. I think the biggest positive in your situation is that you guys are willing to go and talk to someone to work through whatever is happening--that's huge and so many people are afraid of that.
We saw a counselor during our first year of marriage when we went through some things too...it was a huge help and it WAS a person we found through my work EAP program. So fingers crossed, you'll find the same positive fit. One thing I did do was when looking for a therapist, I tried to find someone with a religious background similar to ours--not necessarily because I believe that's better, but I felt that person wouldn't exactly push us to a divorce, you know? I didn't want someone to say, "Well, life is short. If you're unhappy, get out," as some therapists might.
As I said, it was a huge help to us and our marriage. And even when we didn't always agree with the therapist, we felt comfortable talking to each other and working through our issues.
I wish you both nothing but the best. big, big big hugs!
(((((((HUGS!!!)))))))
I am so truly sorry to hear this. I really hope you guys are able to work everything out, and that everything turns out for the best.
I'm so sorry you guys are having a rough time. Hugs to you!
What about creating an alter-ego and going on your local to ask for recommendations for a counsellor?
You could also ask the person who married you if they know of any marriage counsellors.
Best of luck to you.
::more hugs::
I'm so sorry
Lots of hugs your way.
Hugs to you! I know this is very difficult. I've been there myself and am a firm believer that talking to someone is a great gift to your marriage. Good luck finding someone and lots of good vibes your way!
sending zombie internet hugs
pgh
and good vibes...
I think someone already mentioned this, but do you have a doctor you like that could recommend a counselor?