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We need good thoughts for tomorrow....
We go to trial tomorrow and I'm sick to my stomach over it. Those of you who don't know the backstory... My DH's first wife died from complications of Leukemia 10 years ago. Her mother is WICKED. Truly the most miserable person I've ever met in my 42 years of life. Anyway, she has continually poisoned the kids against anyone Erik dated - and told them I was only with him for his money, I'm nothing like their mother, etc. NEVER, EVER tried to know me, never tried to foster a healthy relationship between the kids and me - just always validated their negativity when they were reprimanded, etc. (Yes, Erik and I are on the SAME page with discipline for all 6 kids and discuss EVERY aspect of co-parenting).
So she manipulated and connived with Erik's oldest to have her run away 2 days before she was supposed to go away to college - and his daughter ran away to grandma's. The g'ma would throw threats Erik's way about his career, etc - with NO basis - just being her vicious twatwaffle self. At that point, Erik stopped her contact with the kids (september of last year). She sued us for visitation and after months of that being drawn out, we allow her one visit with all of the kids together per month.
She's also suing us for child support. For the 18 year old that ran away to her house. Unfortunately, NY law is support until 21. However, we're hoping the judge will see how manipulative and vindictive the g'ma was in orchestrating all of this and rule against her. BTW.... she's suing us for $2550/month PLUS college expenses. Our feeling is if SD wants to be supported, SHE should file for the money. Not her g'ma who NEVER had custody - and you cannot have custody of an "adult".
Tomorrow's court should be the final appearance. Trial. It sickens me that this horrible *** is doing this to my husband because she cannot get over the fact that she is no longer in control of DH and his kids. (she used to babysit for them while he worked midnights until he proposed to me -- then she quit the next day. A true piece of work....) Please think good thoughts for us tomorrow... If we have to shell over all of that money every month, we'll have to sell our dream home and all 5 of the remaining children will be so devastatingly impacted.
Re: We need good thoughts for tomorrow....
Lots and lots of vibes Lisa. I cannot believe you are having to go through with this. I'm so sorry.
I'm a firm believer in the justice system working for people, even though I know it always does not. My Grandpa was a family court judge back when he was alive. I can bet he'd dismiss this nonsense, then put grams in contempt of court for wasting his time. And then he'd tell the oldest daughter to be thankful for the things she has in life and to get her butt in school.
At any rate, I'll be thinking of you guys.
-J
This exactly!
Good luck tomorrow! I hope everything works out for you.
Lisa, I am so sorry that wicked bi*** is putting you and Erik through all this. Tons of thoughts and prayers!!! I will be thinking about you guys tomorrow
{{Hugs}}
I'm so sorry Lisa. Lots of :vibes: the judge sees g'ma for who she really is!
Maybe I'm naive, but $2550/month seems like a lot for one child.
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Twatwaffle... what a perfect word to describe this woman.
You and your family have got my T&P for a decision in your favor tomorrow!
But there's also a difference between throwing it out early and actually finding that. By her conduct, she has usurped parental authority and essentially emancipated herself. Your lawyer should have lots of ammo. Judges really do like to give everyone their day in court, especially in family law cases. Let's just hope that's what he's doing.