Can we talk about financial problems?

CaliopeSpidrman · July 2010

If one of my friends was talking like that, I'd tell them I'd find them a nice refrigerator box to live in after the bill collectors come.

pinecone79 · July 2010

FallinAgain:
Does the half a million include a mortgage? Look, you get to be horrified, but you gotta keep it zipped until you and your truck-driving H are alone and you can be all "Holyshit, I'd DIE if we had that much debt."

It does, actually. Which is definitely better than plain ol' consumer debt, all right. I will keep it zipped, absolutely. This thread has thoroughly settled me on that - not a word.

tastyburger · July 2010

FallinAgain:
Look, you get to be horrified, but you gotta keep it zipped until you and your truck-driving H are alone and you can be all "Holyshit, I'd DIE if we had that much debt."

thisss. you can express your opinion, but only to your H. : )

and EAB, holyshiit. that was funny.

noisy_penguin · July 2010

I'm just going to pretend this is Cherished and that she's talking about Toots.

tastyburger · July 2010

you are including a mortgage in "bad financial debt?" that's ridiculous. how much cash do you plan on saving before buying your house? Around here, something decent is $300K.

BobLoblaw · July 2010

noisy_penguin:
I'm just going to pretend this is Cherished and that she's talking about Toots.

Hilarious.

Since a mortgage is considered "secured debt" it shouldn't really count. Now, if it was $500K in credit cards/medical bills/back taxes, it would be different.

jens_a_ten · July 2010

Ditto Fallin and Tasty.

Also, I don't find it that horrifying if that amount includes their mortgage. It all depends on how much money they make, costs of homes in your area, etc.

They could have a 400k mortgage, and then 100k in vehicles/student debt and maybe some consumer debt. I certainly wouldn't be comfortable with that, but it's not like it's a horrifying/irresponsible amount for everyone.

If they are clearly in way over their heads and are bitching about it, I'd change the subject or else tell them that if they can't handle it, they should downsize their lifestyles.

lisaiesha · July 2010

Maybe this is something you'll understand once you're a homo(wner).

Temp893353375007415 · July 2010

tastyburger:
you are including a mortgage in "bad financial debt?" that's ridiculous. how much cash do you plan on saving before buying your house? Around here, something decent is $300K.

I wouldn't count the mortgage if they have the means to pay it, because around here the housing market is similar to Tasty's.

CaliopeSpidrman · July 2010

I keep thinking of people it might possibly be but remembering a detail that doesn't match up with the backstory. Listen, I think you just need to tell us who you are. Or give us clues. That can be a fun game.

officer's*wife · July 2010

You're seriously "horrified" over $500k in debt that INCLUDES a mortgage? Yeah, that's not horrifying at all, unless, say, their mortgage is $50k and the rest is consumer debt. Though I doubt that.

pinecone79 · July 2010

jens_a_ten:
Ditto Fallin and Tasty.
Also, I don't find it that horrifying if that amount includes their mortgage. It all depends on how much money they make, costs of homes in your area, etc.
They could have a 400k mortgage, and then 100k in vehicles/student debt and maybe some consumer debt. I certainly wouldn't be comfortable with that, but it's not like it's a horrifying/irresponsible amount for everyone.
If they are clearly in way over their heads and are bitching about it, I'd change the subject or else tell them that if they can't handle it, they should downsize their lifestyles.

Well-said, man. And seriously, I'll just change the subject in the future if it comes up again. Thank you for your input, everyone!

Novemberrocks · July 2010

I don't think it's any of your business until and unless your friend asks for advice. I also don't think $500k is that much if a mortgage is involved, but that's probably because I live in an area where you wouldn't likely have less than a $500k mortgage.

lindsayll · July 2010

Unless they are outright bragging about ringing up as much debt as possible in anticipation of filing bankruptcy, you have no grounds to say anything. However, if that is the situation, I wouldn't be above a little righteous indignation b/c people who do that can kiss my asss.

Temp893353375007415 · July 2010

I think we should play Cali's game.

This is what we know:

Husband owns a truck, works in computers, went to a state school

Supposedly a regular poster (maybe not), rents a place, not provided advice in this post under their real sn.

Any other clues that we can use?

Vinny2008 · July 2010

CaliopeSpidrman:
I keep thinking of people it might possibly be but remembering a detail that doesn't match up with the backstory. Listen, I think you just need to tell us who you are. Or give us clues. That can be a fun game.

I'm just going to go with Dot.

Kamikaze3 · July 2010

2bMrsEAB:

I think we should play Cali's game.

This is what we know:

Husband owns a truck, works in computers, went to a state school

Supposedly a regular poster (maybe not), rents a place, not provided advice in this post under their real sn.

Any other clues that we can use?

Most likely born in '79 and a big fan of pinecones.

I think your friend's are a little strange for telling you about their debt/mortgage. If my friends talked about that a lot it would make be feel strange but I still would not say anything.

audreyhorne · July 2010

2bMrsEAB:
I now have Salt n' Pepa in my head.

Finances are awkward, but talking about sex won't be any less so, I think.

CaliopeSpidrman · July 2010

audreyhorne:
2bMrsEAB:
I now have Salt n' Pepa in my head.

Finances are awkward, but talking about sex won't be any less so, I think.

No no no, I believe she's thinking that they should Push It.

Vinny2008 · July 2010

CaliopeSpidrman:
audreyhorne:
2bMrsEAB:
I now have Salt n' Pepa in my head.

Finances are awkward, but talking about sex won't be any less so, I think.

No no no, I believe she's thinking that they should Push It.

You are all so wrong. If they wanna be freaks and sell it on the weekend, it's none of your business.

BobLoblaw · July 2010

CaliopeSpidrman:
audreyhorne:
2bMrsEAB:
I now have Salt n' Pepa in my head.

Finances are awkward, but talking about sex won't be any less so, I think.
No no no, I believe she's thinking that they should Push It.

Oops, I suck. Never mind, nothing to see.

_Fenton · July 2010

If one of my live beyond their means friends show me some new fancy purchase, I will refrain from gushing over it and say, "Oh, that's nice," very casually. I would not want to feed into the buying euphoria, but I'm not going to question them.

Now is one of my younger siblings bought something too expensive on their income I'd say, "Are you out of your goddamn mind???"

CaliopeSpidrman · July 2010

Vinny2008:
CaliopeSpidrman:
audreyhorne:
2bMrsEAB:
I now have Salt n' Pepa in my head.

Finances are awkward, but talking about sex won't be any less so, I think.

No no no, I believe she's thinking that they should Push It.

You are all so wrong. If they wanna be freaks and sell it on the weekend, it's none of your business.

No, YOU'RE the one who is wrong. I'm pretty sure her friend makes her wanna shoop.

Temp893353375007415 · July 2010

Vinny2008:
CaliopeSpidrman:
audreyhorne:
2bMrsEAB:
I now have Salt n' Pepa in my head.

Finances are awkward, but talking about sex won't be any less so, I think.

No no no, I believe she's thinking that they should Push It.

You are all so wrong. If they wanna be freaks and sell it on the weekend, it's none of your business.

I think Pinecone just wanted to brag about how she has a "mighty, mighty good man"

boxerfan · July 2010

holyeffingshit how do you get yourself into that much debt without buying a house? but ya, stay out of it, it's not your business.

ftnups · July 2010

SarahBethBR:
salimoo:
I ignored the post and instead tried to think of whose husbands have trucks. I'm sorry.
You and me both.
But dude, did you see the girl on MM who complained about her friend's dog while she was dog-sitting, and said friend posted calling her a liar?
I don't really remember the question. But if it was whether to say something to your friend, I vote no. People can be really strange about money, and if you want to keep the friendship I wouldn't say anything unless they asked.

I was scouring the MM board trying to find this post but I couldn't find it - did it get deleted?

notquiteblushing · July 2010

pinecone79:
FallinAgain:
Does the half a million include a mortgage? Look, you get to be horrified, but you gotta keep it zipped until you and your truck-driving H are alone and you can be all "Holyshit, I'd DIE if we had that much debt."
It does, actually. Which is definitely better than plain ol' consumer debt, all right. I will keep it zipped, absolutely. This thread has thoroughly settled me on that - not a word.

Well then we have debt over $300k in debt and I think we're doing pretty well. I think you're being a bit judgy. But anyway I've had friends whose finances were crazy and I just tried to keep my opinions to myself unless they asked for advice.

SarahBethBR · July 2010

ftnups:
I was scouring the MM board trying to find this post but I couldn't find it - did it get deleted?

Sorry, I just saw this.

Yeah, it was deleted. I never saw the original and all the follow ups have been deleted too. They were cached before the friend came and posted so nothing juicy.

Can we talk about financial problems?

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