October 2008 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
*MrsStreff*
Please don't rehome your cat just b/c you're having a baby. Babies and cats can get along and I would hate for another adult cat to be taken from its family b/c a real child came into the picture.
Re: *MrsStreff*
Shaina,Disregard me telling you to post it in my post.
I don't know anything about what the FB post said but yeah, is there any other reason why?
are you kidding me with this?!
i don't have FB so i obviously don't know what it says but really?!
i have 2 cats. 2 cats that act like babies themselves. you don't rehome a cat because you have a baby. as a matter of fact, the one cat that is very jealous of anyone getting my attention ADORES zoey and guards her with his life. he loves her so bad. my other cat couldn't care less about her. he honestly is more interested in her 'things' than her.
i don't know what the reasoning is here so i may be completely off base but the baby hasn't even come yet. why would you even consider this?!
if you have another baby someday and this baby is acting out, are you going to rehome him/her as well?
Zoey Emma 08.18.10
Is it wrong that I just busted out laughing at my desk? My coworkers are giving me the side-eye.
I try to avoid mrsstreffs animal posts because they irritate me. But I'm going to chime in here.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure she was complaining about the cat jumping on the counters, and getting into the trash. She also posted about her poor kitten who died while being living outdoors..
I dont agree with rehoming due to a new baby on the way. But, this may be in the best interest in the cat. She obviously has no interest in taking proper care of the animals, or working with them on their behavior issues. So maybe giving the cat to a family who will have time for it, is in it's best interest.
And that's all I'm really going to say on the matter.
I'm a breastfeeding, baby wearing, cloth diapering, co-sleeping, anti-CIO Mommy
Raising Bean
Wives Unscripted
Married my hero on 10-11-08
Our bean was born on 05-19-11
Oh this makes me sad
The slightest thought of losing my dog when he dies sends me into fits of tears. I'm with the others...is there an actual reason you're trying to find them new homes or you just don't think it will work?
All very valid points Mar. Although I don't think it was MrsStreff who had a kitten that died outside. Unless it happened to her too. That was awesomesauce, who I think GBCN after that post.
i agree with mar's post, i guess i just view my cats AS part of my family. i would never even consider rehoming them unless they or the baby were in danger and ALL avenues were exhausted.
if you don't have time to work on disciplining your cats or even have the patience to TRY, you are going to be in for an awakening once you have that baby. just sayin'
Zoey Emma 08.18.10
I'm pretty sure it was. Because I remember talking about raccoons, etc. And she said that there were no raccoons where she lives. And Alaska doesn't have raccoons... But I could be wrong.
Either way.........
Edit:: I just remembered who awesomesauce is. She's huge on the pet board, and I know it wasn't her. I'm pretty sure it was mrsstreff, and awe.sauce chewed her out about it too.
I'm a breastfeeding, baby wearing, cloth diapering, co-sleeping, anti-CIO Mommy
Raising Bean
Wives Unscripted
Married my hero on 10-11-08
Our bean was born on 05-19-11
My B! I got her confused with ARO.
I retract the letting a kitten die part of my original post. But I know the counters and trash thing are Mrs Streffs, so that'll stay.
I'm a breastfeeding, baby wearing, cloth diapering, co-sleeping, anti-CIO Mommy
Raising Bean
Wives Unscripted
Married my hero on 10-11-08
Our bean was born on 05-19-11
I didn't see the FB post in question because I guess I'm not friends with her on FB for some reason. But anyways. I can't imagine getting rid of a pet like that. Especially if you haven't put work into getting to the root of the problem and working on behavior issue with the animal..
We have done a huge amount of work into training our dog since we got him 3yrs ago. And I know will will have to do an enormous amount of work into doing more training with him when it comes time for kids. The first night we go him we had a what the hell did we do moment, but we were already invested and didn't want to send him back to the shelter, so we hired a trainer and got to work. Yes it was hard and time comsuming, but I don't regret it for a moment.
I couldn't imagine getting rid of a him just because we were having a baby and he started slipping on some of his training. Just time to buckle down and remind him of his training.
As someone else said, will you get rid of the first kid if they starts misbehaving when the next kid comes?
My Knot Bio My Blog
Okay I am only quoting this so I can get to the link it won't show on the post for me and I can't copy and paste it when I quote. Sorry if that sounds nutty.
***
We have had our cat for almost 8 years, he's one of the babies! When the baby came along he was incredibly jealous of her. But we worked with him and showed him the baby was his friend. Left him sniff around her stuff, picked him and cuddled with him while we were holding her. Now their BFF's, she gets on the cats nerves somedays but they work it out and love each other. Actually they do so well together we just got her a kitten right before christmas, now Bella and the 2 cats travel around the house seeing what they can get into together.
Unless there are circumstance out of your control, please don't rehome that cat just because your having a baby.
Wow, its nice to wake up to this kind of a post. First off yes i did post awhile ago that she was getting on the counters and into the trash and we have tried correcting it and nothing works. Second I never had a kitten that died. I am sorry that we are thinking about getting rid of her and I wasnt going to post this on facebook but my number one reason is because my DH doesnt help me with ANYTHING! This whole pregnancy I have had to mask & glove up just to clean her litter box, because my DH wont help me. I have a DH who's mother spoiled him as a child and did everything for him, so there for when I have this baby, my load is going to double and I am stressing out about it. I dont plan on just giving her to some random person on craiglist, thats why we are trying to find someone we know. Our second reason is we have a really small duplex and its getting smaller with all the stuff we had to add for the baby. She isnt getting much attention lately because I am already really busy, so I would love for her to be with a family that has time for her crazy ass.
I am so sorry that my post upset anyone, really didnt see that comming.
So what the heck is gonna happen when the baby comes?
if he doesn't help with a cat he certainly won't help with the baby dani!
Zoey Emma 08.18.10
I'll give it to you that you at least are trying to find friends/family and not taking to a shelter or putting it down (please don't).
I really really worry for you having a DH that does nothing b/c it's going to be a big ole shocker for him when the baby comes. I would not be here today if it weren't for my H being SO helpful and supportive, we're completely equal in caring for Campbell. You need to have a real serious talk with him b/c you can't rehome the baby and you made the baby together.
You don't have a cat problem, you have a DH problem. You need to get this straightened out now, before there's a baby in the picture and getting rid of the cat won't fix it.
Get to counseling, go through church, your EAP, your health insurance. And no a couple good days with your DH won't outweigh the bigger issues.
DH has a coworker going through a similar thing, but she's got a 10 month old and is ready to walk out. Don't let it get that far w/o doing something.
But please don't rehome the cat, it's not going to fix anything. You may have to rehome your DH it seems, but I wouldn't do so until after counseling.
Wives Unscripted
BINGO
this. word for word.
you aren't a single mother. don't let him treat you as if you are one. i would have lost my ever loving mind by now if my husband wasn't a willing participant with me, the baby, and the house.
you may have done everything BEFORE but i'm telling you, you better hope you don't have a c-section because you literally CAN'T do anything.
good luck with that.
Zoey Emma 08.18.10
This for sure! Having a baby is HARD, having one without help.....I can't imagine. And yes pets are more work and there are nights I heave a sigh when I remember I have to clean the box (which I do every other day), but Buster is our first baby and we love her! Riley more than any of us, I think, lol.
I am going to agree with these ladies. I thought something was off the other day when you mentioned it was a chore to get your DH to go to ONE Dr. appointment with you. You were right when you said it shouldn't be a chore. Nor should emptying the litter box so his very pregnant wife doesn't have to risk her health to do so.
I def think that you guys should really look at getting some kind of couseling. He has to understand that this behavior is not going to be OK when the baby comes. He needs to help out. As someone pointed out, it sounds like he has made you a single mom, with out leaving the house.
My Knot Bio My Blog
I'm not going to say too much here except I hope you and dh get some help, I think you really need it especially with a baby coming. You haven't gone out of your way to hide the fact that you guys are having some problems (I think you even mentioned it in Jackie's post). I also hope you are able to find a loving home for your cat it would take a very long time for me to come to the conclusion that I have to rehome my dog I can't imagine it was easy.
TY Pooks -- took the words right out of my mouth. As someone who is cutting down on everything in her life because it's not manageable with an infant and a H who tries hard but is not too helpful, I understand why you need to cut back on your responsibilities. I can't imagine it was an easy decision and I hope you find your cat a good home.
First off, I am really sorry that you are under so much stress because your husband isn't helping you...
...BUT as someone who is married to an only child whose mother did everything for him, I can tell you right now that they know how to do it, they just choose not to because they know you'll do it.
Jerk a knot in his ass and tell him to start helping now.
Even though I do a majority of the work around the house (mostly because I want it done the way I want it done), the moment I need help, all I have to do is ask or mention it and if he can figure it out, he will do it.
I can not imagine being 9 months pregnant and still having to do everything. I really hope you guys go to counseling and he realizes he needs to get his act together. Also, I know that getting pregnant was kind of a "surprise" to you. Is he excited about being a daddy at all?