Family Matters
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Courthouse wedding?
Long story short our wedding was cancelled due to FHs family interrupting things.
A big wedding (planned and paid for) is now out of the question--did anyone get married at the court house? Thoughts?
This is my #2. His first.
Thanks!
Re: Courthouse wedding?
Regardless of where you get married, you are still married. Don't let your dreams of a pretty princess day let you forget that.
BUT....when you marry your FI, you get his family in the deal. If they have already been allowed to interrupt your wedding, where does it end? If your FI isn't able to stand with you when establishing and enforcing boundaries, this is going to be your life.
How did the future IL's manage to interrupt things this badly, and how did your FI respond?
I think getting married at a courthouse is NBD. No better or worse than a church, garden, etc.
But, listen to Mrs.Rad - you are getting his family in this package, and it sounds like that is probably a problem for you. I think you should be really careful about this wedding & marriage...
Depending on how and why the parents "interrupted" things would dictate to me whether it is reasonable/unreasonable to cancel a paid for wedding.
If it is not impossible to do your planned and paid for wedding, I wouldn't cancel - although (again it would depend on the "whys") you may have to tweak and edit your original plans for the wedding ...
I don't think a court house wedding is a big deal - you can also do other little nice things that aren't court house, but small, if privacy is all you're after.
That said, I think it would be foolish under the circumstances I can perceive equating to future in-laws interrupting the actual wedding plans, to do a courthouse thing. I suppose, too, it would depend on how the FI is interpreting everything, too.
What matters is what you and your fianc? put into it. If you treat it just as reverently as you would treat a giant wedding, then who cares if it's small? It's about your pledge to each other, not the ceremony itself. I mean, not having a funeral wouldn't make you any less dead.