September 2009 Weddings
michelle142
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
How do you feel about...
... open marriage?
... hairless cats?
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with?
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store?
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Re: How do you feel about...
open marriage? Not for me. If you wanted an "open" relationship, you shouldn't have gotten married.
hairless cats? Absolutely awesome and I wish I had one. His name would be Xenu.
how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? I'm not familiar with how its dealt with.
why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? Wow, seriously? That makes no sense. But strangely, I hate lemon scented dishsoap and cleaning products, but love to use the lemon juice stuff. On a side note, I noticed that my dishsoap says its non-toxic and I was thinking, shouldn't that kind of be a given?!
Stand up for something you believe in.
Hairless cats - are fvcking scary looking.
Internet harrassment - I think there need to be stricter laws for that sort of thing.
- Lemon soap v. lemon juice - I think it's because lemon juice is a natural cleanser, but can taste bitter if it sits around in a bottle for a month waiting for someone to buy it. I'd rather buy real lemons than the stuff in a bottle anyway. Yum.
Open marriage? Hey, to each their own, but really not for me. I'm with Amelia on this one. What's the point in getting married? Our marriage is our own personal party and the capacity limit is 2 thankyouverymuch.
Hairless cats? AWESOME. I've always wanted to touch one. I wish BB (white cat)was hairless b/c I find her hair EVERYWHERE. I even threatened H that I would shave her at one point b/c she hates being brushed and tumbleweeds of her hair pop up in weird places during the summer. We vacuum 3x a week b/c of her.
How online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? There definitely should be more proceedures in place to combat it esp. when children are involved.
Why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? I never realized that. We don't use lemon dishsoap anyway. Tarnises our flatware. I hate the fake lemon juice. How hard it is to buy a real lemon and squeeze it? Fresh is always best!
... open marriage? Definitely not for me. I agree that it's disrespectful to the sanctity of marriage.
... hairless cats? N-O
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? Eh, I don't know enough about this to really comment. Just delete someone, yo.
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? This makes me stabby. On a side note, I bought some homemade lemon bath soap at a flea market and it was the greatest thing ever.
... open marriage? ~ It's not for me, but I don't care what anyone else does in their relationships. I just know myself and that I would not handle sharing my husband with anyone well.
... hairless cats? ~ Disgusting. So So So gross. I once went with my sister to pick up her dog from the groomer and they had a hairless cat and the thing must have just KNOWN that I hated it. It was crawling on my lap and rubbing up against my face. I finally freaked out and yelled at the owner to come get it off of me...Not my finest moment. But for serious..those things are freaky.
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? ~ Like, in schools? Or in adult life? I don't know..I think schools probably aren't doing a great job in keeping ahead of the technology curve, but I think there should be stricter rules on bullying in general. I think it's good that it's become a national issue, hopefully now the awareness will bring about some good changes and kids who are constantly picked on will have some recourse.
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? ~ I can honestly say I have spent no time thinking about this issue. Lemon dishsoap usually smells really weird to me. I try to stay away from it.
... open marriage? It's not for me, but if others want that I won't judge.
... hairless cats? Beyond creepy.
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? I think it should be taken more seriously. I feel like people (kids especially) use technology to their advantage to "pick on" other kids, but no one knows how to stop it.
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? It's just weird. Why would lemon juice not be real lemon?
... open marriage? It's not for me, but if it works for someone else, who am I to judge.
... hairless cats? They freak me out. It's just not right. Kitties are supposed to be fluffy!
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? I'm must be out of the loop on how this is currently handled.
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? That's just ridiculous, but sadly, not surprising at all.
... open marriage? its not for me. like others i believe that all aspects of marriage should be shared by two people, only two people. if you dont want to blend your life with only one other person for the rest of your lives, then dont get married. and since we're being honest, i judge people who have an open marriage. i do not however judge people who choose not to get married and have an open lifestyle.
... hairless cats? they kinda freak me out. and there is a dude in my development who has two hairless dogs that he walks. they wear shoes and vests. its sooo weird.
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? im not that educated on it but i have heard horror stories about FB harrassment. although i will say that harrassment laws in PA are ridic. you cant get a restraining order on the basis of harrassment unless you can document contact for 30 days straight. 29 days then a one day break? nope. no restraining order for you. additionally, restraining orders are issued on a municipal basis. so say you live in one municipality and work in another, you would need 30 days at home for a restraining order there and another 30 days of constant harrassment at your place of work for a restraining order there. say you go to dinner in another municipality? no restraining order.
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? weird. although i think it might be because of real lemon juice's cleaning capabilities. and in lemon juice you just need the flavor.
So, for those who disagree with open marriage, what about gay marriage?
Or is it only about having two people in the marriage? So, gay marriage would be okay but polygamy isn't?
I don't know how I feel about open marriage. Open implies secrecy and that's what makes me jealous. Or even not secretive (like you know your wife is out with X) but still, you don't know exactly what's going on. And, that's what comforts me - knowing exactly what's going on.
**Not being snarky, honestly curious**
gay marriage =/= open marriage
the two are completely unrelated and totally separate topics.
Well, critics of legalized gay marriage say that it ruins the sanctity of marriage.
Your argument against open marriage said that it ruins the sanctity of marriage.
HENCE my question.
Can the attitude, will ya.
im not a critic and you asked how i feel... thus i told you.
i do not feel that gay marriage ruins the sanctity of marriage...i feel that openly engaging in a relationship either physical or emotional while married, regardless of your spouses approval, ruins the sanctity of marriage.
therefore, to answer the question you posed, to me, gay marriage =/= open marriage.
The studies show that they have about the same divorce rate as non open marriages. Non open marriages fall apart for a variety of reasons and open marriages are often that way to cover up those reasons. Long term, the cover up doesn't work and then they fall apart for, often times, those same reasons non open marriages fall apart.
Psychologically, it's very interesting, though.
Thank you.
That was the answer to my question.
I agree. Gay marriage does NOT ruin the sanctity of marriage. Although, I also believe there should be NO general sanctity of marriage - each couple should 'decide' the own sanctity of their own marriage.
Haha, you're not a whore. Well, maybe you are but not because of this post. :-)
Sex is a part of marriage. Probably a big part. And, sexual compatibility is essential or at least the willingness to work on sexual compatibility is essential. Yes, that does sound unsexy - LOL.
I also think living together before you get married is essential. Not only for sexual reasons but it gives you time to work out the kinks - not putting the cap back on the toothpaste, rinsing dishes before putting them in the dishwasher, lol. This allows for the time after you get married to be smoother than it would be if you didn't live together first. For instance, there were very little growing pains after we got married since we had already been living together for a year.
I guess where we differ is I don't think all your sexual needs can be fulfilled by your husband or wife. For me, I am very bisexual so right off the bat, my husband can not fulfill those needs of being with a woman. Now, there are lots of bisexual people who have monogamous marriages so don't generalize what I am saying but for me personally, I want to have sex with both men and women.
What you asked about reasons - you know how people often have babies because they think it will make them happier and their relationship better? It's sometimes the same thing with open marriages. This is not always the case and oftentimes, people don't even know that they're having a baby/participating in an open marriage in order to cover up the problems. For instance, I could be doing it.
Yes, I shouldn't have generalized - it does sound like you have an awesome sex life. :-) YAY!
However, I think anyone who says that literally ALL their needs are met by one person is not considering all their needs, or is denying it a little bit, or hasn't lived long enough to realize all their needs, etc.
So far, this kind of lifestyle has greatly helped us. Not that it couldn't take a turn for the worse as anything can. Like I said, it's different for me since, no matter how awesome my husband is, he's not a woman. :-)
... open marriage? A huge mistake. I've known too many that have failed because they thought they could handle it, when in reality, it went beyond being "open" and just became all-out cheating, and yes, there is a line.
... hairless cats? Gross.
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with? I know there are a lot of movements out there now, only I think they came about too late. Online bullying, just like IRL bullying, is serious, but it's sad that it's not taken into consideration until it goes too far.
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store? It's a enigma wrapped in a paradox...
updated 10.03.12
Genuinely curious.
Where is the line? How do you know you've crossed it?
And, open marriage - are we distinguishing between swinging/swapping and open marriage?
Not just you, everyone, including me. :-)
When I've said I've been there, I've been there.
I've prolly been much deeper into the Lifestyle than you ever will be, so you don't need to try to get technical with me.
The line is when you start getting sneaky. When you start hiding what you're doing from your partner. When you start lying. When you're being anything but "open."
updated 10.03.12
I know you've been there. And, yes, you're probably right about being deeper.
I was just curious since all day we've been all saying open marriage but I think there is a huge difference between open marriage and swinging/swapping so when people give their opinions, I was wondering if they were referring to om, s/s, or both.
Thanks for explaining 'the line.' :-)
well, what do you think the difference is?
updated 10.03.12
In my opinion, open marriage is both people being able to engage in sexual *and emotional/mental* relationships with other people on their own. So, they may have a boyfriend.
In swinging/swapping, both people are engaging in sexual acts with other people together. So, they just have friends/playmates.
So, as soon as one person goes out on their own, it becomes open marriage, not swinging/swapping.
You're totally right about the cleaning lady. :-) I think everyone wishes we could afford one.
I guess I am thinking more along the lines of sexual needs (H definitely doesn't fulfill all of them) and emotional/mental needs (need friends, but then other ppl as well - playmates). And, I haven't lived long enough either.
You're totally right about the cleaning lady. :-) I think everyone wishes we could afford one.
I guess I am thinking more along the lines of sexual needs (H definitely doesn't fulfill all of them) and emotional/mental needs (need friends, but then other ppl as well - playmates). And, I haven't lived long enough either.
... open marriage?
We have "experimented" more than once, but it was all before we were married, or even engaged for that matter. I think if someone else wants to have an open marriage it's their choice (although I don't necessarily agree) but it's certainly not for our marriage.
... hairless cats?
I think they are ugly as sin, but i've never been around one, so I can't say for sure.
... how online (FB) harrassment is dealt with?
I think that online harassment should be dealt with more seriously, especially in the case of teens. On the other hand, I think it's a paren'ts job to monitor what their children are doing online.
... why they use real lemon juice in dishsoap, but artificial lemon juice in the "lemon juice" they sell at the store?
I never knew this! I hate lemon dish soap - smells horrible to me. Likewise - I prefer to use real lemons!
thats what she said
ZING!!!
updated 10.03.12
HA. That was awesome. :-)