Grand Rapids Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Happy Thursday
You are NOT a bad mom.
My husband hates that I'm a hypochondriac! He barely even listens to me and my ailments anymore.
Juli, being an overall worrywort sounds pretty awful too. My worrying is more targetted -- like toward my health (and the health of my family and cats), and traveling (I worry like crazy leading up to a trip!).
Des&Molly, sorry to hear about your night! That sounds pretty rough.
That is some bs. You need a new church. Find one that isnt biased again race, religion, etc. You may benefit from a non demonitational one. BTW I will PM you the title of that book tonight.
Whoa, that's not cool. I think that's a pretty narrow-minded view of mental health, personally.
To answer your question... I don't currently go to a church, however, I did when we first moved to GR. I knew I wanted to find a ELCA Lutheran church, so I searched for them online, narrowed it down to the ones that were a relatively convenient location to me, read their web sites, and started visiting churches. The first one I visited was predominantly old people, and seemed quite old-fashioned, so it wasn't a good fit. The second one had a ton of young people and had a more upbeat and uplifting message. I felt comfortable there, so that's the one that we started attending.
I'd have to agree -- you're a good mommy!!!!
Aww thanks. It's just really hard sometimes, and I feel like I'm not doing enough. I guess I don't really know what I am supposed to do when he gets up screaming in the middle of the night and is inconsolable. Haha someone needs to write a What-to-do-in-situations-like-this book.
I don't want to scar him for life because I let him CIO. You know?
Um wow. Yeah, I'd look for a new one too.
We've been looking since Christmas last year. We can't seem to find one that's "us". I googled churches in my area and visited websites to kind of get a feel for the church, and if I liked it I would put it on my list along with service times then just start going to those churches on the list.
Yeah, it's got to be hard, but don't get too down on yourself. You won't scar him for life.
I haven't personally read it, but have you looked at the "Happiest baby on the block" book? I've heard it's got a lot of good ideas.
We had to do that with Ben a few times, and I felt terrible. So terrible, that he is in the habit of waking at 1am and will only go back to sleep if we bring him into bed with us every single night. It was sweet at first, but now I want my bed back. BUT I know the only way to break this habit is going to involve CIO and I can't do it again
That is really horrible. I'm glad you don't believe it/agree with it. I don't attend church on a regular basis, but the church I do attend once in a blue moon is the church I grew up going to. Good luck in your search!
I really don't want to get into that habit, but I was SO tired last night that I tried bringing him to our bed. The second I sat down on the edge of our bed, he started screaming again. So back to standing we went.
I think H was able to lay with him on the couch. I'm just assuming, since I woke him up and handed T over and tried to go back to sleep, and H brought T out to the livingroom and things were quiet for a while.
I used to let my son get in bed with me -- he was 6 before I permanently got him out of my bed.
It's hard to let the cry it out, but I think it's best in the end.
That's rough.
Was he awake? Otherwise it sounds like a night terror to me. C used to get those a *lot* and it sucked big time. His other "screaming for no reason" reason is an ear infection. Hope tonight is better.
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You are not a bad mom. If you hold your ground for a few tough nights you will get past there, before he creates bad habits. You are setting him up for good sleeping patterns in the future.
Amelia has been bad at going to bed the past few nights. She does this every so often because she knows that she has someone wrapped around her finger and can get away with it. And then, meanie momma has to inject after a few weeks and put her foot down.
Run as fast as you can from there. My thought is that you rely on God to give you the strength to go to counseling and take meds and do what you need to deal with depression and such. Jeez - with that line of thinking cancer patients shouldn't take chemo.
How often does it happen? GRkaters had a good point about it being night terrors or ear ache. Amelia will wake up crying and she fights me when I try to console her. I can't hold her but can't put her down. I don't know if I would call it a full blown night terror compared to stories I've heard from other moms. I will snap at her or try to get her to look at me and will say over and over "Mia, look at me." or talk to her. I will often sit in the rocking chair and hug her really tight until she calms down.
Then there are other nights that she calls out to us and then points to the rocking chair and say "ROCK -two minutes." Those nights, I know she just wants company. We were just about at the point that we were going to pull the rocking chair out of her room, but things got better for a while.
He was awake, and this happens very rarely (last night was maybe the 3rd time ever.)
I know he doesn't (or shouldn't) have an ear infection because he's been on non-PCN antibiotics for an ear infection that should be gone now. I wonder if he just had a night terror or something and then was just really nervous/scared and didn't want to be alone. He wasn't hungry and his diaper wasn't dirty.
I would go by rule 1-2 times in a row is a fluke and 3 times in a row is setting a pattern. If something like that happen every so often, then I would go by the thought that something wasn't right and she would need extra comforting. After three times, I would worry that I was setting myself up for a pattern.
Also, there were times that i had to let the girls cry it out because they were just so overtired that what they needed was sleep. They didn't want to be comforted, but yet I couldn't lay them back in the crib without them crying. When I knew I was in a no-win situation, I would let them cry it out.
This is really good advice!
Hope you get all the rest you need tonight Des& Mol!
Thank you for the advice MB! And thanks Hoek, I hope I (and T!) sleep well tonight.
Maternity leave? I'm sorry that you are upset. Whatever it is, I'm sure it sucks. (((Hugs)))
No not maternity leave. I'm not given the opprotunity to acquire overtime this spring because I'm pregnant and I shouldn't work in the warehouse, however I personally feel that I should be given other opprotunities to get overtime like every other hourly employee- just with different work. I can do a lot more here than just warehouse work. AND there is warehouse work I CAN do, I just feel like they are choosing not to give me that chance. And my hours will be cut this summer. I used to use my overtime to suppliment the shortened pay during that time. Now, I'm basically screwed because I'm pg.
I'm sorry. This just doesn't seem right. I hope you can get something figured out.