Minneapolis/St. Paul Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Confessions/Vent/AW
Confession
My daughter is pregnant. Yup. My 15 year old daughter is pregnant. She will be 16 in a few weeks, but that doesn't really make it any better. This is not a good thing in any way. Maybe someday down the road it will be, for now, I'm beside myself. While I firmly believe there are teenagers that can make it work and be good parents, I don't know that she can. I'm NOT raising this baby - financially or emotionally.
Vent
Oh where to start. Wait, I better not. Way too much.
AW
I can't wait for Mother's Day. DH and I are going away for 2 days up to Cove Point Lodge and I really, really need some time away. I've had a really bad attitude/outlook lately and I don't like feeling this way.
Sorry for your stress. In the nicest possible way.. do I remember correctly that you were pregnant with your daughter as a teenager? Not that it makes it "ok" or better or anything - but that if I am remembering correctly (and if I am not - I am sorry!!) that you were the knottie/nestie who was pregnant as a teenager. If this is you - how were your parents about your pregnancy, and did you end up doing better than they expected? (tone sucks on the internet - I am trying to be thoughtful and helpful... I don't know if that comes through or not..) ETA: My point is.. that maybe it won't be as bad as you think it might be. Of course, it very well could be.
Is she opposed to abortion or adoption?
One of my greatest fears is that my little sister will become pregnant. She's a freshman in high school, has a body that no 15 year old deserves and I know the boys flock around her.I have no reason to believe that she's sexually active, and if she did decide to have sex I can't say that it's wrong. I just want her to be responsible. I've told her so many times that I won't judge, I won't ask questions, but that my house key is hidden in XX place and the condoms are stored in XX place, and that she can take as many as she wants whenever she needs them - no questions asked.
As for myself - I don't really have any AW/Confessions/Vents.
jack | born 9.13.12 at 40w4d | 9 lbs 12 oz | 23 in
my puppy loves - chloe & jenson
pregnancy blog | chart
Wow. That's a tough one, Sarah. I can't imagine the emotions you're dealing with.
Have you guys discussed her options (abortion, adoption, etc.)?
margaritas in mexico
Confessions: None.
Vents: I've been so freaking tired lately. I still blame DST. Also, I'm lacking motivation. I'm dreading my side job picking up again. The thought of 16-hour days and no summer weekends makes me want to cry. I know I'll enjoy it (most of the time) once I get back into it, but right now the thought of it is daunting
Plus, I'm a workaholic and I love money and the people I work with, so I can't give it up.
AW: We're going to see Jersey Boys at the Orpheum on Tuesday for our anniversary. It just so happens that my H is in a theater class right now and attendance of some performance is required. If it weren't for that, there is no way he would be going. I like this class
margaritas in mexico
I had been super tired too - my doctor checked my vitamin D levels and they were seriously low. Once I started taking supplements, things got better. Maybe have that checked out?
jack | born 9.13.12 at 40w4d | 9 lbs 12 oz | 23 in
my puppy loves - chloe & jenson
pregnancy blog | chart
Interesting thought. I had my vitamin D levels checked last time I was at the doctor in November and they were fine, but that doesn't mean it couldn't have changed.
I've also been slacking on the vitamins.
I'm definitely going to look into this.
margaritas in mexico
Confession: I've been doing better lately with diet/exercise....until DH bought this bag of Beer Chips at Costco the other day. I don't normally crave salty things and I hate beer but these chips are SO. FREAKING. GOOD. *crunch crunch crunch*
Vent: It was a rough night last night dog-wise. Boston played too much fetch after dinner, ended up throwing up on our nice wool rug, and then was out of sorts the rest of the night. I woke up at 5:00 a.m. to find him sitting on the floor on my side of the bed (so basically his face is level with my face) and smacking his lips LOUDLY. I haaaaaaaaaaaaaate that sound. DH was an ANGEL and went and slept on the couch with the boys for a couple hours and let me close the bedroom door so no puppies could bug me. I owe him BIG time.
AW: I've lost 5 pounds in 2.5 weeks. The last half of the winter = lazy junk eater Jenny and now I'm getting back on track.
Good work!
I need to get back on track. For me, that involves cutting back significantly on three key things:
1. Alcohol
2. Cheese
3. Sugar anything
My self control gets progressively worse as you go down the list. Getting over my sugar cravings is next to impossible.
margaritas in mexico
In November you were probably still using vitamin D stores from the summer...right now it would make sense it is low since we get little to no sun over the winter.
It's natural for D levels to go up and down throughout the year.
Yep, that was me. And I'm praying to God that you are right and it turns out better than I'm expecting. This is one time I really, really, really WANT to be wrong.
My parents (mom and step-dad) were very supportive of my decission. They also made it very clear that they were not raising a baby - it was/is my responsibility and I had better figure it out and step up. And yes, according to my mom - I was better than she expected. I went to school, I worked 3-4 nights a week and I took care of my daughter. I can count on one hand the number of times my mother babysat for me while I lived in her home with my daughter. I was a mom and I did what moms do. I HOPE I can be a good/strong as my mom was. I HOPE I can set and keep the same kind of boundries she did. She made me the mom I am by letting ME raise and care for my baby.
I was in SUCH a different place. I was 1.5 years older than she is, I was a lot more mature than she is (even when I was 15, I was more mature than she is at 15), I WANTED a baby, planned it, which puts a person in a whole different frame of mind.
She is completely opposed to abortion. Will not even consider it. Which is fine. I'm Pro-Choice in my believes on the topic, so I get that.
She is considering adoption but "only because that is what everybody else wants". She doesn't want to give it up for adoption, she just doesn't know how to make it work, mostly financially.
The whole thing is such a roller coaster.
I've been tired lately too. I'm taking my vitamin D and my multi's like I'm supposed to. I just get like this sometimes. I HATE it. Of course, stress is probably the problem right now.
There are more pressing concerns than finances.
Check out the March of Dimes website. There's a ton of great information from expectant mothers' nutritional needs, to healthy fetal development, and how to encourage healthy physical, social, emotional, and intellectual development for the first years of life. Hopefully she has some child/human development classes she can take at school as well.
I just bought gummy Vitamin D vitamins. My mom's doctor told her to be taking a TON of VD, so I thought I'd give it a try too. I'm on day 3 now and haven't noticed a huge difference yet...
Confession: I don't know if it's the stress from school or what, but I am not as interested in "quality time" right now. Big D would like to have more "quality time." Right now it's about once or twice a week. I'd like to get into it more, but I'm not feeling it right now.
Also, I keep wondering if I am ever going to make the definite decision to say yes to kids. I guess I assumed that we'd have them someday, but I think I need to decide soon. (I'm 32.)
Vent: Just this mountain of papers to correct sitting on my desk - it's spring break and I'm still working. Bah.
AW: Less than 2 months to go before our big road trip! We're heading to the national FACS conference in Phoenix. I won a membership incentive to AAFCS, so they are saying my name at a luncheon. woot.
This may be confession worthy (albeit a lame one): With all of the vitamin D talk, I might hit up Catch a Tan this weekend.
I used to tan a lot in college, but then cut back to just before vacations and I haven't been in a long time now. But, I have a $100 gift card that's been laying around for a year plus. I'm thinking a few minutes of some fake sun may help.
margaritas in mexico
We are doing all of that as well. She has already taken the child development class at school. She is getting the prenatel care she needs and following the recommended diet.
There is no doubt she is going to need all the resources she can find, so thank you. The financial ones are just a little harder to find/get. It seems like everyone will step up and give you education and/or educational resources, but when it comes to money, well, that is a different story.
You won't notice a difference immediately. And according to my doctor (so take it for it's worth to you) you want to take vitamin D3 and not just straight D. I forget the reasons why...... Maybe ask your doctor?
My doctor explained it like this: You have a vitamin D "tank". My tank was almost empty so, I took a loooooooot of vit D3 for a few weeks to fill up my tank and then leveled off my dose to just maintain the tank. (You can overfill your D tank but it takes quite a bit to do that.) So- you want to keep your tank maintained at almost full but not overflowing. Does that make sense? You will start to feel the benefits when your tank is closer to full than empty.
eta: I'm starting to feel like Vicki from Real Housewives of the O.C. talking about her "love tank" :-)
Confession: My maternity leave ends today. I start work on Tuesday. I am so sad and upset that I have to send Aubrey to daycare. Yes, I know she's going to be safe, learn a lot( it's a Spanish/English immersion program) and eventually she will make friends but selfishly, I do not want to be away from her. Shes been with me 24/7 for 9 months in utero and now 10 weeks as an outside baby. As I type this, she's laying in my arms, I can hear her little breathing/snoring- ugh. I have cried over this for weeks. I'm not looking forward to going back to work either- alot of changes have happened while I've been gone. My whole team has/will be leaving me and I will have a new boss and team members. That's stressful enough but it's peak busy season and Aubrey is not a good sleeper at night. I'm up every three hours at the most and it took an hour to get her down after her 4am feeding. This whole thing is going to suck.
Also, for the life of me, I cannot get my siggy pic to work. Ugh.
Vent: I am a bit discouraged with DH. Right now, I do practically 90% of taking care of Aubrey. I am home with her all day and when he comes home from work he folds her for about 30 minutes or until she gets fussy and says, "here's mommy" as he hands her back to me. He also needs help changing her diaper because she "moves" too much. I get little or no time to myself ( thinking work will help this a lot) but I am really worried about what's going to happen next week during the night. It's all me after 9:30pm. She cries to eat, I feed her. She wakes and cries for no real reason, it's all me. He says it wakes Jim but he never helps mainly because he works and I can nap/ try to nap during the day. I'm just hoping that he can pick up the slack at night/overnights because I will be just as tired as he is after working all day.
AW: DH and I are finally able to feel comfortable bringing Aubrey places. Yesterday I took her to the mall and she hung out in her stroller for two hours looking around and not fussing. She was so good yesterday!
AW: I have been SO productive in getting stuff done around our condo in preparation for putting it on the market. Lots of little projects that I've talked about doing for years (been there 8 years) but never got around to it - and now, at least 3 of them are DONE! Still a lot more to do, but DH is gone for a week so I can really buckle down and hopefully do everything before he gets back. This weekend's mission is to declutter and move A LOT of stuff into storage (booksheves, desk, books, boxes, etc) - plus I'm recaulking the bathroom which is always a challenge. The place is going to be a mess!
Confession: It felt REALLY strange to go to bed last night without DH. The place was SO quiet. While we've spent a few nights apart here and there, this is the first time in over 5 years that will will be apart for more than 3 or 4 days - and the first time in 5 years that I've been at home alone ( usually, I'm the one who travels out of town).. It was very odd to have the bed to myself! Odd, but also NICE!
Vent: I am exhausted. Of course - I can only blame myself - because for the past 2 or 3 weeks, I haven't gone to bed before 2 AM - and I've been getting up at 7 AM (usually earlier if the cat wakes me). We've gotten into a bad routine of staying up late, working on things (my fault), being on the computer (DH), or talking (both of us). Throw in a touch of insomnia and it has been rough! I just can't seem to get out of the pattern and so I am constantly exahusted and then I get home and there is so much I want/need to do and I don't have the energy . . . until I get a second wind around 10 and then am active until 1:30 when I realize the time . . . . bad bad cycle.
Confession: nothing i'm willing to share
Vent: DH and i got in big argument last friday. he is 1000% in the wrong (you have to trust me on this one) but won't apologize. he sent me flowers "just because" on wednesday and i'm not enjoying them much because i feel like they are his lame way of saying "forgive me". i want an apology with words. face to face. so, i'm mildly annoyed.
AW: 1. i'm getting my hair colored tomorrow. 2. my very very talented friend Vanessa Meade is doing a photo shoot of me tomorrow at a seedy motel. hair, makeup and all. i can't WAIT! it was something she donated to a silent auction and i bid on it and won. we're actually going to do another shoot when it's warm and green out.
Vent: Yep, this is a pretty lame one but oh well. My friend sent me a link to the Coach online sale this morning, I picked out the things I wanted and went to check out and it said the the 10 item max was reached (I had to log in as my friend since you had to be invited to this event to purchase anything). Apparently she sent the link to a bunch of people and they all ordered under her name. I was bummed because they were such a good deal (my total savings were almost $300). I guess it just means it wasn't meant to be.
AW: This weekend will be the first time I have seen my extended family since they found out we are expecting (my mom sent out an email to everyone). I have a great family and I know they will all be so happy and supportive.
Confession: I am annoyed with DH's family. I just found out last night that they volunteered our house to have Easter on Sunday. Granted I am only cooking for 6 people, I am not prepared at all. And this means I will have to skip dinner with my family and show up there later. I wish they would learn how to plan things in advance!
I totally understand this. At one point in time I was thinking, "Okay....what's next?"
If you ask my mom she would answers BABIES. Hah.
Another vent: DH's sister has three children. A boy (7) and twin girls (5). They are all incredibly sweet and I adore them. DH's entire family, however, seems to favor the boy and totally overlook the girls and it drives me mad!
FIL and MIL are always talking about the boy, how they want to take the boy here and there and do special things with him (fishing, train-rides, etc) and they hardly ever mention the girls and as far as I know, NEVER do anything special with them. Instead MIL complains about how the girls misbehave and get into trouble. Hmmm, maybe they are trying to get your attention?!?!
For a while, it was an age thing - the boy is older and it was easier to do things with him - but now, that is not an excuse. They could easily take the girls somewhere - and I'm sure SIL would be quite happy to give up her two rambunctious girls for an afternoon!
But even in gifts, the boy seems favored. DH is seeing them all this weekend and so I sent a bunch of little gifts with him. Cute shirts and a few things for the girls and the same for the boy - - - but it was hard because while I was told the boy loves Star Wars and Legos and what size clothes he wears, I was only told the clothing size and "they like pink" for the girls. Not much to work with - but I did my best to get them all equal gifts . . . . Then DH went out yesterday before he left and got TWO sets of Star Wars Legos for the boy and nothing more for the girls! GRRR!! Granted - both were small, but still - - when he hands out gifts to all the kids, the boy is getting TWICE what the girls are getting. It seems horribly unfair to me.
I was raised in a family where my sister and I were treated equally - down to the penny spent on gifts! DH's family seems to lavish attention and gifts on the boy and completely overlook the girls - - and I don't want us to mirror that behavior the few times we see them. And while DH was simply acting on his sister's request to get Legos for the boy, I really wish he had thought to get something else for the girls - - - although his sister made no similar request on their behalf.
LOL. That would probably be my mom's and my MIL's answers too. We do want children, just not yet
Thanks for the heads up! I will check and see what type of D I bought when I get home. Hoping it's the right one *crosses fingers*!
Confession: I'm secretly happy that DS's early arrival means DH has to go back to work for 4 weeks before the school year is over, which means I may get to stay home for 4 extra weeks:)
Vent: DS's newborn screening came back positive for congenital adrenal hyperplasia, but the NICU doctor said not to worry because 95% of premature babies come back positive for this. 2 more tests later, results are still abnormal. Last Friday, per our pediatrician, we had to rush him to the emergency room at Children's for more labs, and we have been waiting on results since. They told us to expect results by early this week. Needless to say DH and I are on pins and needles waiting, and DS is doing so well it's hard to believe something may be wrong. Either way, we just want the lab results so we can move forward.
AW: Can't think of anything that's not baby related since I haven't really done much in the last 3 weeks except go to the grocery store and Target. But I'll attempt to AW this picture if it works:)
Oh my goodness! That picture is adorable perfection! He is beautiful!!
OMG, that picture is PRECIOUS!!!!!