October 2008 Weddings
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: FFFC
I love Andrew's family but they freaking drive me crazy! My FIL demanded we come out there for dinner tonight, sorry not happening!!!
I can't wait to have an hour between us and his parents.
Alexander David
11.25.09
my blog
oof that sucks Stacey
.
Sorry Dana, that would annoy me too.
Sometimes it annoys me to hear my mom telling me all the things Campbell does all day. It's good because she doesn't want me to miss things but it makes me sad. She also tends to act like the things she does to take care of him are better than the things I do and that drives me nuts.
And my job is really irking me after those meetings I was in this week. I want a new job.
This is what I am afraid is going to happen when MIL watches LO. It is one of the reasons why I seriously consider SAH
Summer and Dana - I'd be annoyed too.
Good luck Stacey! I would feel the same way.
Since we're on the topic of MILs, I wanted to commit homicide against mine at the wedding we went to a few weeks ago. During the rehearsal dinner (I still have no idea why my ILs were even invited to it), MIL got drunk off her ass. During the dinner, she began screaming my name incessantly from across the room. She was yelling, "Danielle, come here!" I was seated on the other side of the room and tried to pretend like I couldn't hear her. But people around me began saying, "Hey Danielle, that crazy lady over there wants you." I never went over but she continued to scream my name. I have no idea what she wanted. At one point she came over to me, interrupted my conversation with someone else, and asked if the baby was kicking. Um no and I wouldn't tell her if she was kicking. She later fell down the stairs and had to be escorted out of the place because she was so drunk.
She did the same thing at the wedding the next night too - interrupted me to ask about the baby kicking. I really can't stand the woman.
Sorry Dani
That is nuts! Does she have an alcohol problem? What does DH say?
MILs best friend told Rob that she thought that she (the friend), Rob, and I should have an intervention with MIL. I told them that I wanted no parts of it but that I supported whatever they wanted to do. They haven't had this intervention yet though.
I'm sorry Dani
Alexander David
11.25.09
my blog
I don't want to sound like I hate my ILs but right now they make it hard for me to like them. I really hope I can keep my mouth shut this weekend. And I'll tell you all right now that if my nephew is given tons of new toys this weekend while my ILs have yet to get my son a bday gift or christmas (my nephew was given his bday and christmas gifts) gift I will go NUTS!
Alexander David
11.25.09
my blog
I just told Andrew that I need to be a SAHM. I hate that someone else sees my son do new things before me. I would die if it was my MIL.
Alexander David
11.25.09
my blog
Oh my, Dani! She's crazy! How embarassing? I totally agree she has a problem.
Don't get me wrong, Nick and I are so thankful he's with someone who loves him almost as much as we do and it's free but some days it just gets to me.
Today what set me off was - and remember this is FFFC, I know it's dumb - she said "he had jam on his toast today". I said "oh, I gave him some grape jelly on his toast this weekend and he looked at it weird and touched it and then ate it" she said "oh is that the first time you gave it to him? I've been giving it to him for weeks now!" Okay, you're so much better then! And the other day she also asked if at bedtime I sang "its time for niiiigh night, niiiigh night" I said "no, we have our own little routine for bedtime...blah blah" and she was like "oh." like hmm, my way is better.
That would annoy me too Summer
ditto. MIL already does that type of stuff with the dog. Aggrevates the crap out of me. I know she means well but I just want to scream at her, "why can't you just do X the way I want you to do X!"
I think this might be more of whines than confessions.
My husband has worked until at least 8pm every night for the past few weeks to bust his butt to get a project done for his deadline today. We were both so happy it was over and I would get my husband back and then they tell him yesterday that he has a meeting at 8am on Monday morning to start a new one. I am happy that they are busy and that his firm is flexible enough that he can always come to doctors appointments and take time off for our vacations but I am annoyed that he is working so much extra and still on reduced pay. Obviously they are busy enough that they can probably afford to go back to full pay. I sure hope they do before October!
I am researching stuff for our registry and I have been talking to my mom about a lot of things. It is starting to get me really down that her and I do not live in the same city and get to do these things together. We had such a close relationship but had a rocky couple of years and now we have this baby to bond over again. It kills me that we can not do this stuff together. She is supposed to come down next month so we can do stuff.
October 11, 2008
Trusty Gal blog|Trusty Tales
I'm sure that I'm going to hear some backlash about this, but it is flame free, so whatever.
I hate, hate, HATE when women complain about gaining weight and getting bigger during pregnancy. Guess what?? You knew that was going to happen. You wanted to get pregnant. It's not going to last forever. You're growing a new life, your son or daughter, and they need you to get big for them. Once the baby is born, you'd do anything for them right? So what's the big deal about doing this for them now. It's a temporary inconvenience for a long term gain. Get the eff over your size!
And I also want to add, that complaining about being uncomfortable, doesn't bother me. Of course you're uncomfortable. But to complain about how big you are or how much you weigh is ridiculous.
Mrs. Little Drew 10/25/08
Blog
TTC since 1/2010 - Dx with Stage IV Endo
11/10 - 100mg Clomid + trigger + IUI + Estradiol + Progesterone = BFN
12/10 - Unmedicated cycle due to RE not doing treatments in December = BFN
1/11 - 100mg Clomid + trigger + IUI + Estradiol + Progesterone = BFN
2/11 - Same sh!t, different month = IUI cancelled due to no response = BFN
IVF #1 - Start stims (Follistim) 5/10, add in Ganirelix 5/14
ER 5/21 - 13 retrieved, 7 mature, 5 fertilized; ET 5/26 - transferred one perfect 1AA blast. 3 snowbabies.
Beta 6/3 - 15.8; Beta 6/7 - 21.8; Beta 6/10 - 7
FET - Transferred 1 AA blast 7/11. Beta 7/20 - 311! Beta 7/22 - 784!! First u/s 8/10
*~PAIFW/SAIFW~*
It's not just you that is annoyed by this. And it is always the people who look like they are "all baby" that complain.
Dani I'm sorry you MIL is an a$$. I would have been so pissed if my MIL did that, at a wedding no less.
My FFFC is I don't agree with ear piercings on babies/young children (except for cultrual/religious reasons). I guess I just don't see the point. It seems sort of vain to me.
My Knot Bio My Blog
I saw a 10 week old with her ears pierced and thought that was pretty young (it wasn't for religious/cultural reasons).
I don't know that complaining about uncomfortableness should be any different - it's generally expected that expanding and having a child inside you won't be comfortable just like it's expected that you'd get bigger and gain weight (Coming from someone who complained about not being able to sleep on her stomach and being able to breathe or sleep and lots of other things).
Personally, the people I come across don't actually complain but are more surprised at how big how fast, etc especially when they've seen others look differently at the same stage.
It definitely doesn't help that you're giving a LOT to be in their shoes and it's frustrating to hear them complain. I have never been in that place so maybe that's why I don't notice or am not bothered.
For me, seeing the scale go up is extremely difficult. I have struggled with my weight my entire life and was even called "the fat one" by a mean boy back in high school and that has forever changed the perception I have of myself.
It takes me a lot to control my weight to a point that I am comfortable with the way I look and to see that change is very emotionally trying. Even now, I am watching what I eat like a hawk because I'm afraid of gaining too much weight and never losing it. And for some people it is not a temporary thing. My sister is STILL struggling with getting her preprenancy body back, 3 years later. For some people it isn't temporary without surgery, so to say that it is, is rather naive. Not everyone is blessed with an incredible metabolism and can lose weight without even trying.
I think for the most part this board has been very sensitive to the fact that you (Tania) are in a difficult situation and we try very hard to respect your feelings given your situation, but please cut us some slack as we are dealing with something that is much more than just physical but very mental and emotional as well.
This is not even because I've been struggling with infertility. There are no guarantees that I won't blow up like a whale and struggle with my weight after birth. In fact, that's a big fear of mine since I've been thin my whole life. Even further fact, if I look at my mom, I will struggle with my weight after giving birth. However, I, and I'm sure any other mom that you ask, will gladly trade a thin body for the beautiful face that you will look into.
And I don't want any of you ladies on the board to feel like I'm calling you out. Yes, for the most part, you have been sensitive to my situation. I do have other people in my life who are pregnant, who complain incessantly about weight gain. It's very hard to carry on a conversation and try to talk to them when they always just go back to that. There is only so much reassuring that I can do.
Mrs. Little Drew 10/25/08
Blog
TTC since 1/2010 - Dx with Stage IV Endo
11/10 - 100mg Clomid + trigger + IUI + Estradiol + Progesterone = BFN
12/10 - Unmedicated cycle due to RE not doing treatments in December = BFN
1/11 - 100mg Clomid + trigger + IUI + Estradiol + Progesterone = BFN
2/11 - Same sh!t, different month = IUI cancelled due to no response = BFN
IVF #1 - Start stims (Follistim) 5/10, add in Ganirelix 5/14
ER 5/21 - 13 retrieved, 7 mature, 5 fertilized; ET 5/26 - transferred one perfect 1AA blast. 3 snowbabies.
Beta 6/3 - 15.8; Beta 6/7 - 21.8; Beta 6/10 - 7
FET - Transferred 1 AA blast 7/11. Beta 7/20 - 311! Beta 7/22 - 784!! First u/s 8/10
*~PAIFW/SAIFW~*
my FFC is on the same line as Summer's. i am very fortunate to have my mom watch Z but if she makes a comment to me one more time about certain things, i may just shove something up her as$.
and not that i care whether people agree with my decision to pierce my daughter's ears or not, but i had mine done when i was 5 and screamed bloody murder around the mall and refused to have the other side done. it didn't bother her one bit getting them done (even did better than my 10 year old cousin) and they close up if she chooses not to have them when she's older.
and while on the same topic about pregnancy, babies and such. it's ridiculous that people have to constantly worry about hurting other people's feelings if they feel like venting, complaining, etc.. my sister tried for 6 years to have a baby and finally got pregnant after IVF. do you think she never compained about gaining weight or her size? or the fact that her kid can be difficult? it's life.
certain parts of pregnancy suck whether you got pregnant on the first try, 10th try or needed outside help. if you think that life is just going to be so freakin glorious you have high expectations. pregnancy and motherhood is life altering and if you don't allow yourself to vent or complain ever, you are gonna lose your ever-loving mind.
that is all...
Zoey Emma 08.18.10
I agree. I mean it sucked gaining for sure, after working years to lose70 lbs, but I just kept up my workouts with the knowledge I could lose it again once Riley was born. Of course now I'm not losing too fast thanks to BFing and supply issues, but it's not the most important thing to me. I guess I have my mom to thank for raising me with a positive body image despite being overweight from about 5th grade on. I'm still 45 lbs from my highest ever weight so I still have that
I've pretty much given up on getting back into my best shape until we're done having kids.
You are my long lost sister Jess. I did the same thing. I only jut got them pierced before the wedding because Andrew wanted to get my diamond studs. If we have a girl I plan on having her's pierced as an infant.
Alexander David
11.25.09
my blog
I absolutely can't help but feel as though you are specifically calling me out. Yes, I fully admit to having complained about my weight but I have always complained about my weight on this board (way prior to becoming pregnant). Like Alicia, I've struggled with my weight for most of my life. My struggles might not have been nearly as hard as others but I've never felt beautiful or skinny. I often envy girls like yourself who appear very thin and always look amazing. I've been compared to my 110lb sister my whole life. It hurts like hell to constantly hear about how beautiful your sister is but never hear the same thing about yourself.
Just because I complain about my weight - which isn't "all baby" by any means - doesn't mean that I don't love my baby and am not grateful for the life in my belly. As Alicia said, I think that this board has been incredibly supportive of your struggles (myself included) but reading some of your comments lately just make me feel like I'll never get the same support/respect back.
Zoey Emma 08.18.10
this x a gabillion
Agreed, we did Bella's at just before 6 months and she was great with the process. We didn't do it at that age for vanity reasons. It made the most sense to us so she would pull and tug at them and make them sore. She will always have the option to take them out if she wants to when she is older.