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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: S/O on inlaws post
We're all kinda of equal. My FIL works and MIL is SAHW.
It depends how you define things. You mean where they are now, or compared to where they were at our current age?
At our age, I think we're probably better off than both.
At their current age - ILs are retired and have (unfortunately) spent a lot of money on BIL. I don't know 100% of their situation, but I know income is limited. My mom and SD are currently better off - they are both still working and SD does very well.
I have many friends who get things from their parents or inlaws that they can't afford- help with their house, furniture, vacations, stuff for their kids. I don't think there is anything wrong with it AT ALL but there is no way I would ask my mom for anything. DH and I are way better off than either of our parents. Maybe it's because we both grew up pretty low income that I kind of subscribe the idea that each generation has an improved standard of living over the one before, but I see in many of my friends lives that it's not true...
I have one friend who grew up in an affluent part of Houston and her husband does very well (she SAH with 2 kids. They have a huge, new house and a very nice life but her mom takes her shopping all the time for really pricey items like Tory Burch riding boots or a new LV bag. I think sometimes she gets annoyed that her DH doesn't provide the same standard of living that her parents do but they are also much older. It was probably not the same when she was a kid!
We are way better off than my ILs. They made some really dumb decisions a few years ago. From what I understand, they were in a pretty good spot 10 years ago.
My parents are fine, but don't have any extra to spare. They've had to make some major adjustments to handle the expenses of private Alzheimer's care for my grandma.
We're better off then my Mom but I think most people are as she lives off SS/Disability.
My IL's are definitely better off then we are.
Crazy Christmas Kids!
By the time they were our age, my ILs had already paid off their house, so they were better off in that sense. But they also had $0 in retirement savings at that point, so based on net-worth, we are better off than 30 year-old-ILs.
ILs saved a lot over the years since they didn't have a mortgage, but they're still not as well off as my parents. My parents are definitely the best off out of the three couples at this point. We're slightly better off now than they were at our age, solely based on the fact that mortgage interest rates were at 18% when they were in the home they owned at the age of 30.
In the long run our plan is to be as comfortable as my parents by retirement age. Hopefully that means retirement age will be able to come early.
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you. My Blog
We're better off than my parents. My parents have always been very open about financial problems and the money that they don't have. But they do manage to financially support two of my three (adult) siblings even though my dad is in forced-retirement due to medical issues.
I'd guess that we're probably equal to the ILs but I don't really know. They don't really talk about finances/financial problems... but maybe that's because they don't have any problems. But they are older so they've had more time to save...
One things for sure, neither have 200K they can just give us to buy a house with a pre-approved air condition unit!
Than my parents- much better off
Than the IL's- it's a wash. Between DH and my salaries we probably make what FIL made alone. That will change over time (I hope :-)
Comparing to both of them at our current ages, I'm sure we are better off than they were back then.
As of now, they are all better off than we are for sure. I feel like that's the way it's supposed to be when you have worked as long as they have. We hope to be where they are in 20-30 years, but we have a ways to go!
We are better off then ILs, they (at our age +/- a few years) were living with his parents, in their basement, rent free. FOR 10 years before they moved into their own rental. Still to this day they are broke, but that is due topoor money management & high medical bills from my MIL who has Munchausen.
We rent a home right now & plan to by within the next year. & we are healthy.
- Paula Deen to 104.1 KRBE's Producer Eric 9/17/2011
we are leaps and bounds better than FIL he makes a #*%#* ton of dumb #*#&ing money decisions. Like is almost 60 and has zero retirement and zero in savings.
This.
My parents made more when both were working. They are both retired, but still doing well, but of course, your salary drops in retirement.
Kevin's parents are about equal, but they dont have any debt, so they always shower us with gifts. They are very generous
We are definitely better off than ILs were at this age. Probably fairly comparable to my parents at this age.
My parents are very well-off, and while they live well, they live beneath their means and are very generous with others (both personally and in terms of charitable giving). We have the earning/savings potential to be at least as well off as they are, possibly better, I believe.
MIL is not hurting (although there are times when she would like to have you believe otherwise), but she and FIL did not plan/save as well as they could/should have, and she has a tendency to live beyond her means, so there is that. Barring disaster, we will easily be in better shape when we reach the age she is now than she currently is.
We are way better off than all of the ILs. The disparity is a bit embarrassing to me at times (a personal hang up of mine) so I try to not ever discuss financial matters with them.
We are better off than my parents were while I was growing up but my dad planned his retirement well and is living large now. We don't have any financial problems but he's still funding the kids' college savings and sends us money quarterly. I don't complain.
Compared to when my parents were my age, we are better off.
If I were to compare them now to use now, I would say they are due to their retirement funds being almost complete, etc.
Currently, we are better off than the ILs. FIL got laid off over a year ago...I could go on and on about the bad decisions they have made since then and how stubborn my FIL is but I'll stop there. lol
My parents are better off than us. My dad makes more than my dh and my mom works too, while I'm a SAHM. They are not good but not bad with finances. My mom just has a problem paying her bills on time, even though there is plenty of money in the bank to pay them.
Sadly we are 24 & 26 and are way better off than his parents. I think it bothered DH at first because his dad would make comments about him making more than him but its all about decisions and his parents just don't want to change their situation. And DH doesn't want that lifestyle so he has chosen more for his life.
My parents are better off than us.
We're better off, by far, than my mom.
We aspire to be as well off as DH's Mom and Stepdad.
I know my parents don't bring in as much as we do annually right now. (My mom is unemployed) But they have much more wealth in general. (property, vehicles, land, savings, retirement, etc.)
IL's - Don't really know, but I bet they make more money annually than DH and I do.
Honestly, it's hard to say.
MIL and FIL are divorced. FIL has a great retirement income beween pension and SS, and 401K. It's all being used to pay for an extremely expensive nursing home. It's a super sad story.
MIL lives on a "fixed income", but she has a very nice retirement. Her house and car (new BMW) are paid for and she has money to do the things she wants. She doesn't have a private jet or beach house, but she has a very nice life and plenty of money to do the things she wants...
My parents are land rich and cash poor (kind of). They have tons of land, but the market has been awful. My dad won't sell because he thinks he's losing something... we want him to sell and move on. The ranches are a lot of work, but he thinks the market is going to come back... it's dumb. If he sold they would have plenty of money. They are fine now, but at one point in time they would have been crazy rich if they had sold their land.
We have a higher income that either of our families did at our ages, but they paid much less for their homes. FIL is the only one of our parents with a Bachelors degree. I think we live a much more complex life than they did... Both of our parents made good investments and they all are all doing okay.