Trouble in Paradise
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Feeling ignored and pregnant
Sorry for posting this in two places I just needed some advice and not sure where to ask first. Last
week we got in a big fight about him having his other baby mammas kids
around my daughter. Now he's ignoring me. I just texteded him asking him
when he going to buy
the baby some new clothes I asked him for months ago (and he said he
would get some) and he ignoring me. I know he's not working because I
literally
just saw him like 1 minutes ago driving to his house. I wish there was
some way I could be like OKAY if you wanna ignore me. You're
not seeing your daughter cause I'm not dealing with you disrespecting
me and I'm not dealing with your immaturity and all your kids. If you
want to waste all
your money on your other baby mama, but just know you're
paying me child support on top of that.I'm already dealing with enough
drama with being pregnant. I don't have time for this. Would do you do
when your baby daddy ignorings you? How would you handles this trying
times? I would talk to his mom but she favors his other kids since she
likes their mom more than me. She still holds a grudge form when we
stayed with here for a while before everything came through for my
housing. Sorry this is so long I just need some advice form others in
this situation too as well.
Re: Feeling ignored and pregnant
Um, I'm going to go out on a limb here and take a guess that you're probably pretty young and thus are going to have a hard time affording this child, even with child support.
I'm probably going to get flamed to high heaven for this, but have you considered putting your child up for adoption?
Let me get this straight. You are currently presently pregnant with his baby, but you also have another child with him. Right?
Why did you think it was a good idea to have a second child with him?
How many other kids does he have?
Then you need to proofread what you type before you post it. Your posts are filled with redundancies.
You keep saying "he can't buy her..." what you need to say is "He won't buy her..." because that's what is really going on here. He doesn't care about the child he shares with you, he prefers his others kids and presumably his other baby mama(s) over you.
Kick him to the curb.
My advice is to stop worrying about this man and move on with your life.
Take care of yourself: get an education, a job, and yourself in a stable financial place for your and your child.
Do not depend on this man anymore. He's not worth it.
FTW!
I think the baby she's pregnant with is not his. But wait, You're going to the club while you're pregnant? um, okay. I have no advice other than to mind your business and get it in writing. Go to court and get paternity/child support for your daughter. Then I guess lather, rinse, repeat with the next father.
So let me get this straight, you're still with him because seeing his other baby mamas and kids remind you of him? That doesn't correlate to wondering why he can't take care of his daughter. You need to wonder why he WON'T take care of his daughter.
Methinks he's still involved with the other baby mama(s) and you're just the piece he kept on the side, or he no longer wants to be with you.
I'm calling MUD.
I mean rose sunset - really?Then who are you feeling ignored by, your husband or the father of your daughter?
Do you still have feelings for your ex?
(shh, everyone stop scaring her off!)
What you should do is be mature and rise above the situation. File for child support and set up a custody arrangement. Wash your hands of the mess that you are making of your life: only have contact with your "babies daddy" through your lawyer, ignore him when you see him out and about (the club, really?), ignore his other children and their mother, and ignore his mother.
Go to school, use birth control, raise your children, and be a good role model. You are the one that is making this situation more dramatic than it needs to be.
So, why haven't you sought child support?
You seem to be focusing on the wrong stuff: you're always reminded of him, you wonder why he can't take care of the child you share yet he cares for his other kids, you "remind" him about her--yet you don't seem angry or ready to say "why won't he care for her?".
Is your husband helping with your daughter? Perhaps that's why he's not helping at all? Why don't you look into severing his parental rights and having your husband adopt her?
Is there court-ordered child support & visitation? If there is, just follow it, no need for contact beyond following the CO.
If not, set it up and don't interact with him otherwise.
Do you seriously expect your child to have no interaction with her 1/2 siblings? That seems like a ridiculous request and one that will probably her your daughter in the long run.
LMAO. Now you are saying that you have a kid is from a past relationship and you are pregnant with your husband's kid. This is laughable. I would be calling MUD but you can't make up english errors like this. My advice: IGNORE HIM. Let the court and your husband handle him. Don't call, text or talk to him. Just write him off as nothing but a check for your daughter and leave it at that.
Sweet God above.
What in the hell would make you procreate with a man who has children he already wasn't supporting?
If he pays child support, buy your kid some clothes your own damned self.
You obligation to care for your child does not end simply because you got knocked up round two.
His obligation to help care for your child does not increase simply because you got knocked up times two.
You absolutely do not have the legal right to deny this man access to his child no matter how he treats you, how much clothes he buys for her, the fact that you're pregnant, or because your doctor says you have stress.
If you need help gettting ready for this baby, why don't you try hitting up your newest baby daddy?
On second thought, I need to live in you would obviously so I can get my exhusband to pay more child support now that I'm pregnant.
Click me, click me!
My Lunch Blog
I kept my legs shut so I wouldn't have a baby daddy.
Sorry, no advice here.
He doesn't take care of his daughter because he is a low life douche who doesn't know how to keep his d!ck in his pants, or, in the very least, wrap his sh!t up.
That should have given you a hint that he really wasn't a good man to get involved with in the first place.
Edit:
Accept the fact that this isn't going to happen. You made a mistake getting involved with this POS and now you are living with the consequences. Cut your losses and move on with your life. You will be less stressed that way.What is it that you need to talk to him about? Why are you texting/calling him again?
You said in your OP something about child support. Okay. As long as he's paying that, why do you need to call him?
It's awful if he's not wanting to see your daughter, but constantly calling him isn't going to make that happen.
Then hire a private investigator to find out how a man with that many kids can afford to get a bunch of hores sloshed at the bar. Maybe he is hiding money. Or maybe he is doing something illegal, like dealing coke. If he is, you can get the evidence, and black mail him into giving your daughter more and spending time with her. That is how you get your baby daddy to stop ignoring you, blackmail.
Thank you
I don't speak to my exhusband, like at all. He sends the occasional email when we need to discuss something and he calls his daughter but he and I have no damned relationship.
You don't have a choice who your daughter is around. My exhusband married some heifer I hadn't met, that I'd never seen. His own daughter didn't meet miss dumbass until two days before the wedding. I don't know what their house looks like. I don't know who the spend time with. And yet, I had her over to her father for visitation and allow him to supervise her and plan activities as he pleases.
Would you like to know why? Because he's her father and if I wanted full control over my daughter, I would have either stayed married or been smarter about who I had children with.
My husband buys stuff for my daughter when she needs it. Want to know why? Because he loves her a much as he would love his own child. In fact, he thinks of her as so. He married me and took my children on as his own regardless of their fathers' responsibility or lack thereof. And I married him because he felt that way.
Click me, click me!
This is why I love you so much.
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