September 2008 Weddings
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FFFC....Go!

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Re: FFFC....Go!

  • I'm about to throat punch my co-worker!  She is driving me BSC and I can't stand it!!!  Today's BIG issue for her was that her paycheck was short...UM YOU IDIOT we have been getting paid weekly now for 4 weeks...Your check is not short, you are just stupid!

    I really wish I could tell my boss all the stupid things she does but that would just cause unwanted/needed drama not to mention stress in the office...She just has ZERO work ethic and it bugs the sh!t out of me since I bust my a$$. .

     Okay, that maybe was a FFFC but I needed to get that out there before I do actually punch her! 

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  • imagerbagsgirl:

    I'm about to throat punch my co-worker!  She is driving me BSC and I can't stand it!!!  Today's BIG issue for her was that her paycheck was short...UM YOU IDIOT we have been getting paid weekly now for 4 weeks...Your check is not short, you are just stupid!

    I really wish I could tell my boss all the stupid things she does but that would just cause unwanted/needed drama not to mention stress in the office...She just has ZERO work ethic and it bugs the sh!t out of me since I bust my a$$. .

     Okay, that maybe was a FFFC but I needed to get that out there before I do actually punch her! 

    I would've told her her paycheck is short because you have to actually WORK in order to be paid....lol

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  • imagePrettyInPearls23:
    imagerbagsgirl:

    I'm about to throat punch my co-worker!  She is driving me BSC and I can't stand it!!!  Today's BIG issue for her was that her paycheck was short...UM YOU IDIOT we have been getting paid weekly now for 4 weeks...Your check is not short, you are just stupid!

    I really wish I could tell my boss all the stupid things she does but that would just cause unwanted/needed drama not to mention stress in the office...She just has ZERO work ethic and it bugs the sh!t out of me since I bust my a$$. .

     Okay, that maybe was a FFFC but I needed to get that out there before I do actually punch her! 

    I would've told her her paycheck is short because you have to actually WORK in order to be paid....lol

    LOL, ITA with Amanda!

    ~DD born 3-25-10~DS born 6-5-12~
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  • imagePrettyInPearls23:
    imagerbagsgirl:

    I'm about to throat punch my co-worker!  She is driving me BSC and I can't stand it!!!  Today's BIG issue for her was that her paycheck was short...UM YOU IDIOT we have been getting paid weekly now for 4 weeks...Your check is not short, you are just stupid!

    I really wish I could tell my boss all the stupid things she does but that would just cause unwanted/needed drama not to mention stress in the office...She just has ZERO work ethic and it bugs the sh!t out of me since I bust my a$$. .

     Okay, that maybe was a FFFC but I needed to get that out there before I do actually punch her! 

    I would've told her her paycheck is short because you have to actually WORK in order to be paid....lol

    Hahahaha that is awesome!  If I wasn't half asleep I totally should have thought of something smart to say! 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker image
  • I might lose.my.*** if my mom tells me a) she's tired from Quinn's alarm waking her up or b) to "sleep when the babies sleep" again. Because going to bed at 7 pm when they've JUST passed out from eating and I haven't eaten or showered is a good plan. Nevermind that one was up from 9-12 and 1-4:30 (C and I split the time, but its not uninterrupted sleep anyway).

    I should be more appreciative of staying there for free + she's been picking me up groceries. But omg I could have shot fire this morning. My insomniac MIL also told me last night 3 hrs of sleep isn't that bad once you get used to it. OK, great. Except YOU nap almost each afternoon.

    I am cranky today. 

  • I will flame myself today.  Forgetting to wear a bra to work makes for a very uncomfortable day.  Having Ds doesn't help my situation.  Thankfully I get off in less than two hours though and no one has noticed....

    CRAFTY ME 

    my read shelf:
    Kasi's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)

  • Kasi- Ouchies!  I couldn't go the day with my Ds free like that. :P

    My FFC is that DH and I had a disagreement earlier this week that involved me making dinner.  I told him I would make it in a little while, but like usual he only listened to the first half the conversation and assumed I was making it right away.  I actually started downloading pictures from our trip and had some issues with our MAC and FB (which I'm STILL trying to fix!), so it took an hour and he came over and got pissed b/c I hadn't even started dinner yet.  I may or may not have thrown his Mama's Boy status into the disagreement which was totally unfair. :P  He did get my point, though, and we both apologized.  I wasn't a fair fighter for a second, but at least I acknowledge it.

    ~DD born 3-25-10~DS born 6-5-12~
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  • I think I'm having an emotional affair.
  • imageabcdxyz:
    I think I'm having an emotional affair.

    AE....hmmm....now I am wondering who you are. 

    CRAFTY ME 

    my read shelf:
    Kasi's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)

  • I am a regular here, but I will not give up my identity.  I just needed to get that off my chest.  It will go no further and it's not even someone I ever see.  
  • imageKasi80:

    imageabcdxyz:
    I think I'm having an emotional affair.

    AE....hmmm....now I am wondering who you are. 

    That makes 2 of us...First prettyinheals (i think it was) and now abcdxyz...Someone totally wants to come out but is scared we will judge...No judgement coming from me!  Just know that we are here if you want to talk. 

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  • imageabcdxyz:
    I am a regular here, but I will not give up my identity.  I just needed to get that off my chest.  It will go no further and it's not even someone I ever see.  
    First of all, ((hugs)) to you, whoever of our regular's you are. It's not easy to say something like you did, even behind an AE.
     
    Second, may I offer some advice? Obviously I don't know the details surrounding the situation, but I can only assume your marriage isn't the best right now if you *think* you're having an emotional affair (which basically means you are). In one of the books I read during everything I was going through, it talked about emotional affairs and it said this: (paraphrased) "If you truly want your marriage to improve and take a turn for the better, you need to cut out the person you're having an EA with. The room in your life they're consuming is leaving less room for your spouse. Take the time and energy you put into communicating with this person and instead, put it into your spouse. It won't be easy and you won't see results overnight, but it's the right thing to do if you want your marriage to make it".
     
    Please consider this. And again ((hugs))...we're here for you.
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  • I am not prettyinheals.  This is not physical, in fact we live many many states apart and have no reason to see each other.
  • imageabcdxyz:
    I am a regular here, but I will not give up my identity.  I just needed to get that off my chest.  It will go no further and it's not even someone I ever see.  

    Hugs!  I know it can't be easy going through what you are going through and I hope you take Amanda's advice to heart.  Hang in there and know that we are all here if you need to vent/talk more. 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker image
  • If you need to, you can talk about it here under your AE and be careful of what you say as to not reveal your identity.

    I agree with Amanda though.  If you feel you want to keep your marriage going cut out the other person.  It sounds like this may be an emotional affair where you are communicating in someway via email, phone, text, FB, etc. 

    CRAFTY ME 

    my read shelf:
    Kasi's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)

  • That's good advice Amanda, thanks.  I appreciate that. 
  • imageKasi80:

    If you need to, you can talk about it here under your AE and be careful of what you say as to not reveal your identity.

    I agree with Amanda though.  If you feel you want to keep your marriage going cut out the other person.  It sounds like this may be communicating in someway via email, phone, text, FB, etc. 

    Yes, we exchange messages sporadically during the work week via email or instant message, never while I am home or weekends.  There are no lovey feelings, I'm just feeling like perhaps I depend on this friendship maybe too much and perhaps some of the communication is inappropriate.

  • imageabcdxyz:
    That's good advice Amanda, thanks.  I appreciate that. 
    No problem!
     
    In many ways, I think EA's are worse than physical affairs, only because it's hurting the biggest part of a marriage -- the connection and bond between two people. Of course physical affairs are awful too, but anybody can go out and have sex with someone. It goes to another level when two people connect in an intimate non-physical way.
     
    I guess I can't offer much advice because I don't know if you want your marriage to work or not. And clearly I don't judge anyone who choose to leave a marriage -- look at me! Wink  You say this other person is several states away and you two have no reason to see each other...but why have the emotional connection? Is there something missing in your marriage that you've talked about with your H and he isn't being receptive to? You don't have to answer these questions if you don't want to, but I'm just throwing it out there.
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  • imageabcdxyz:
    imageKasi80:

    If you need to, you can talk about it here under your AE and be careful of what you say as to not reveal your identity.

    I agree with Amanda though.  If you feel you want to keep your marriage going cut out the other person.  It sounds like this may be communicating in someway via email, phone, text, FB, etc. 

    Yes, we exchange messages sporadically during the work week via email or instant message, never while I am home or weekends.  There are no lovey feelings, I'm just feeling like perhaps I depend on this friendship maybe too much and perhaps some of the communication is inappropriate.

    How is your marriage?  Is this person someone you've been intimate with at any point in the past?

    CRAFTY ME 

    my read shelf:
    Kasi's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)

  • Our house is a mess! We clean enough to keep is from being like something you would see on hoarders but neither of us are really neat people to begin with. We have company coming tomorrow and I ended up out of work early today so I came home and cleaned the bathroom from top to bottom and so far have done 3 loads of laundry with at least one more to go (may have to split it). I am looking at the mess that is my kitchen and dread doing the clean that need to be done in there after naptime and probably a lot of it after Maddy goes down for the night. I hate that our house gets this way and I just want to get it cleaned and keep it that way.

    I told DH today we are going to have to change this. I want to be able to have people drop by and not be ashamed of my home other than the fact that its old and needs some real upgrades.

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  • imageabcdxyz:
    imageKasi80:

    If you need to, you can talk about it here under your AE and be careful of what you say as to not reveal your identity.

    I agree with Amanda though.  If you feel you want to keep your marriage going cut out the other person.  It sounds like this may be communicating in someway via email, phone, text, FB, etc. 

    Yes, we exchange messages sporadically during the work week via email or instant message, never while I am home or weekends.  There are no lovey feelings, I'm just feeling like perhaps I depend on this friendship maybe too much and perhaps some of the communication is inappropriate.

    I think generally if you feel like it might be inappropriate it probably is. Trust your gut, and pull back a bit. See how it feels. Do you talk about this person to your spouse? I became really close with a coworker and we had lunch together every day, hung out all the time during the work day, etc. One time I caught myself telling DH that I had had lunch with a group, when really it was me and this one coworker. I realized it seemed wrong, and that's why I covered - even though, to be fair, NOTHING ever happened and I never was interested in the coworker in that way. I realized that if I couldn't be honest about it, probably something wasn't right...so I just pulled back a bit. We're still friends and actually we double date with this coworker and his wife now, so the dynamic has just changed. But I felt like I was going down this slippery slope and I didn't like how it felt.

    What I'm trying to say is, I can totally see how this happens.  

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  • imagePrettyInPearls23:

    imageabcdxyz:
    That's good advice Amanda, thanks.  I appreciate that. 
      You say this other person is several states away and you two have no reason to see each other...but why have the emotional connection? Is there something missing in your marriage that you've talked about with your H and he isn't being receptive to? You don't have to answer these questions if you don't want to, but I'm just throwing it out there.

    I met this person through a mutual friend 11 years ago and there was an immediate sexual tension.  In the past 11 years we did get together twice for weekends together (while we were both 100% single).

    I think we've just always had this chat/email relationship.  It comes and goes, sometimes we won't 'talk' for months or years.  

  • imageKasi80:
    imageabcdxyz:
    imageKasi80:

    If you need to, you can talk about it here under your AE and be careful of what you say as to not reveal your identity.

    I agree with Amanda though.  If you feel you want to keep your marriage going cut out the other person.  It sounds like this may be communicating in someway via email, phone, text, FB, etc. 

    Yes, we exchange messages sporadically during the work week via email or instant message, never while I am home or weekends.  There are no lovey feelings, I'm just feeling like perhaps I depend on this friendship maybe too much and perhaps some of the communication is inappropriate.

    How is your marriage?  Is this person someone you've been intimate with at any point in the past?

    Actually (you all can believe this or not) our marriage is really, really awesome.  I actually keep thinking that this must be as good as it gets, and then it just keeps getting better.  

    I think this fills a boredom void, and it's always nice knowing someone desires you physically.  

  • imageabcdxyz:
    imageKasi80:

    If you need to, you can talk about it here under your AE and be careful of what you say as to not reveal your identity.

    I agree with Amanda though.  If you feel you want to keep your marriage going cut out the other person.  It sounds like this may be communicating in someway via email, phone, text, FB, etc. 

    Yes, we exchange messages sporadically during the work week via email or instant message, never while I am home or weekends.  There are no lovey feelings, I'm just feeling like perhaps I depend on this friendship maybe too much and perhaps some of the communication is inappropriate.

    What about it is inappropriate? The content of your conversations or what you are having them? From this description, I don't think anything inappropriate is going on since you say you don't have loving feelings for the person (is that flameful of me?). It sounds like a friend. Are you deliberately hiding that you speak with this person from your spouse? 

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  • imagexojo1:

    What about it is inappropriate? The content of your conversations or what you are having them? From this description, I don't think anything inappropriate is going on since you say you don't have loving feelings for the person (is that flameful of me?). It sounds like a friend. Are you deliberately hiding that you speak with this person from your spouse? 

    Our conversations are sometimes pretty racy (although not always, we are in the same industry of work so we have other things we talk about).  He's also someone I trust very, very much and is often helpful in situations.  He'd never be interested in harming my marriage either.  It's just so weird.

    I don't deliberately hide it, in fact I have discussed with DH certain things I've learned from this person. 

  • imageabcdxyz:
    imagexojo1:

    What about it is inappropriate? The content of your conversations or what you are having them? From this description, I don't think anything inappropriate is going on since you say you don't have loving feelings for the person (is that flameful of me?). It sounds like a friend. Are you deliberately hiding that you speak with this person from your spouse? 

    Our conversations are sometimes pretty racy (although not always, we are in the same industry of work so we have other things we talk about).  He's also someone I trust very, very much and is often helpful in situations.  He'd never be interested in harming my marriage either.  It's just so weird.

    I don't deliberately hide it, in fact I have discussed with DH certain things I've learned from this person. 

    The racy part is probably inappropriate if you think it is. All friendships are different, though. DH and I have friends of the same and opposite sex that we talk about that stuff with and we're ok with it because we don't want to do something with the other person. The other stuff... Nothing harmful there that I see. But, you know what's going on best and if you think it's inappropriate, then it probably is for you and it might be best to pull back a bit from this person and/or discuss it with your DH. Feel free to talk to us if and when you need to.

    my read shelf:
    Jo's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
    Blog
  • imagexojo1:

    The racy part is probably inappropriate if you think it is. All friendships are different, though. DH and I have friends of the same and opposite sex that we talk about that stuff with and we're ok with it because we don't want to do something with the other person. The other stuff... Nothing harmful there that I see. But, you know what's going on best and if you think it's inappropriate, then it probably is for you and it might be best to pull back a bit from this person and/or discuss it with your DH. Feel free to talk to us if and when you need to.

    And that's why I said "think" I'm having an emotional affair.  That may not be the right word for it.  It's more like I'm having inappropriate conversations.  I do agree pulling back is the right thing. 

    It feels good to put this out there. 

  • I'm curious what defines a racy conversation. But kudos to you for getting it off your chest. I hope these ladies were able to give you some good advice :)
  • imagecookiemonster03:
    I'm curious what defines a racy conversation. But kudos to you for getting it off your chest. I hope these ladies were able to give you some good advice :)

    Well, like him saying what he'd like to do to me (without being too graphic). 

  • imageabcdxyz:

    imagecookiemonster03:
    I'm curious what defines a racy conversation. But kudos to you for getting it off your chest. I hope these ladies were able to give you some good advice :)

    Well, like him saying what he'd like to do to me (without being too graphic). 

    yeah, I think that's pretty inappropriate and warrants stepping back (heck it would warrant stepping back if you were single and not interested).

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