Trouble in Paradise
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Shared Money Question
Yup, I agree with this.
Click me, click me!
If we set a limit at $100 and he spends $500 I'd be upset. Partially because I can see so many better uses for $400 than buying an expensive gift and partially because I think it's careless to spend that much over the limit.
Unless it's something practical for the house, I can't see going overboard. Although, if I got something practical for the house that I didn't express an interest in getting as a gift, we'd have big problems!
The most practical gift I got from him was jumper cables and a first aid kit for my car (got it for our first Christmas together). He got it for me because it was an hour drive to his place and he wanted to make sure I had it just in case something happened. Luckily for him he got me other things too that were fun. I haven't gotten anything practical since then.
That is a seriously sucky gift, Morty.
When I said practical I didn't mean something like jumper cables. If BF was worried about my safety driving to his place (when we didn't live together) I'm pretty sure he would've bought those for me immediately, not given them as a Christmas gift.
D'oh. True. I shouldn't post before coffee.
I've always liked imoan's "fun money" setup, from the way she's described it on here. I can see that working well and if you have that setup it's easy to then buy a gift in secret squirrel fashion.
I'm sure it's been on here for a while (I haven't been), but that picture of Hart is ADORABLE!!!!!
I also got a really nice watch and the perfume that I like. If it had just been the jumper cables and first aid kit, I would have seriously reconsidered things.
Crabby...I don't think he realized I didn't have that stuff in my car until he asked and I said I didn't have it. Christmas wasn't that far past when we started dating.
We usually talk about a ballpark amount to spend for Christmas, etc.
If I don't want him to know about what I'm getting, I either use cash, use money from an old account that I still have, or tell him not to look at our main account for a few days. :P
I AGREE!!!! OMG!!!
DH and I don't spend much money on gifts. He has access to my Prime account on Amazon, so there no secrets there. When it's gift time I either spend cash or buy an item on a rarely-used CC which I then hide from Mint for the remainder of the month. He doesn't really care either way. We are not extravagant -- gifts for anyone don't go over $100 in our house -- but we do enjoy well-meaning, thoughtfully wrought surprises.
fully disagree.
I am a full time student who makes minimum wage. My SO is in i-banking. I make just less than 5% of his gross salary.
I save for months and still can only afford pretty basic gifts -- he could "afford" to blow thousands if he wanted to. He respects my wishes to keep things modest, and this helps keep us on more even footing. If someone is consistently footing the bill for everything or on the buying end of all of the extravagant gifts, it has the potential to set up a type of power dynamic that I want no part of (especially when the partner who can't or does not want to keep up has expressed his or her concerns about the issue).