Interro's romance novel research thread

Re: Interro's romance novel research thread

• Interrobang member

  October 2011

  LucyHoneychrrch:

  Interrobang:

  LucyHoneychrrch:

  He always "encounters her maidenhead," even though the hymen IS NOT FOUR INCHES UP INSIDE THE VAGINAL CANAL.  

  Also, she always comes immediately when he touches her.

  And the first time he goes down on her, she squeaks in embarrassment, but then is totally swamped with passion, throwing away centuries' worth of drilled-down shame in one single second with no reservations whatsoever.

  Lastly, her dress always "melts away," when in reality it probably took a buttonhooker, three attendants, and twenty minutes.

   

  That's why he needs to rip it off of her heaving bosoms, y/y? See I can do this, lol. I'm thinking about something in colonial times, with a fiesty shopkeeper's daughter. Dude yet to be determined.  

  This would be awesome.  She's in a mobcap; he's the dissolute, wayward son of a member of some Provincial Congress.  Someone kills his father; fingers point to her father, a noted Georgian loyalist.  She in desperation appeals to the son to help clear her father's name and avenge his father's murder.

  Like Felicity:  An American Girl.  Only with, you know, violence.  And heaving bosoms and oral sex.

   

  EXACTLY. Felicity was my favorite. Wait, wasn't her dad a shopkeeper? Huh, I guess my subconscious is plagiarizing the American Girls. Wasn't there some dashing young apprentice she liked? And he went off to war?  

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• wawajeanne

  October 2011

  Interrobang:

  hindsight's_a_biotch:

  eclaires:

  An unmarried female in a small rustic hut with a male who is not her relative might be RUINED by this and have to marry him even if nothing happens.
  

  Might being if she cannot convince her cheeky, yet disapproving lady's maid to go along with her scheme of saying she'd been in her bed the entire time, alone, of course, embroidering.

  This actually gave me a plot idea. Rustic hut ruination FTW!!  

  I am so proud I could help!  I'm loving the American Girls: Now with more sex aspect of your idea btw.

  My sister and I tried to write a romance novel together, but it got all serious and we're like 17 chapters in and nobody has gotten naked.  So now I guess it's just a novel.

  
  
  My Goodness...another food blog. Featuring: Macarons from a old post with a photo taken by my mom for a break from my crappy food photos!

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• Her_Majesty

  October 2011

  hindsight's_a_biotch:

  Ooo and my favorite, despite everything we know of the male race since times of yore and even though the character himself be a selfish notorious wenching manwhores who will take his pleasure wherever it is offered, when it comes to his lady love for all eternity, he has absolutely no problem giving oral without so much as a hint that he might like some in return.

   

  *Standing ovation for HAB*

  I love this!!!

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• BettyBookworm

  October 2011

  This thread is awesome.
  

  "what's another word for 'engorged'?"
  

  
  
  

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• mrsbecky07 member

  

  October 2011

  hindsight's_a_biotch:

  eclaires:

  In the medieval romance novels, Barons or Earls tend to be the main male character.  I am not sure if that is historically accurate, but I've noticed it in my recent Julie Garwood re-reads.  

  Oh and Scottish Lairds win every time.  No matter what the battle is - Lairds WIN.  Julie Garwood told me so.  Judith McNaught disagrees though, and so does Royce Westmoreland.

  Julie Garwood also says you should put two chairs by the hearth with a banner on the wall.
  

  Oh that's because all there were were barons and earls in medieval times. I couldn't even tell you where the rest of those biitches came from. Barons had the land and the knights. I don't know what earls did. I think they were generally kin to the king maybe.

  LAIRDS DO WIN, except in real life when they were generally broke, barefoot, living in broken down castles and participated primarily in stealing from other lairds to make money. The myth of the scottish highlands is hilarious. Or hilariously sad, one or the other. lol

  The only good read lairds were scottish peerage who were neither lairds nor highlanders.

  But for the purpose of the romance novel, LAIRDS WIN!

  Also don't forget if it's Garwood, the Scots are always better than the English, lairds or no - they were more loyal, treated women better, were more fair in matters of justice, everyone was equal in the clan, etc etc.  The English were weak without honor.

   

  

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• mrsbecky07 member

  

  October 2011

  hindsight's_a_biotch:

  eclaires:

  To add to HAB's point above - orgasms can also come from words alone.

  It's amazing.  It's probably the combo of the heat of his gaze and the words.  INSTANT ORGASM!
  

  Particularly if we're riding in a carriage. Also, ladies will go ahead and bone mere yards away from her new husband's men, on the ground, under the sky, on the way back from wherever he snagged her. And they'll still respect her for it in the morning, especially if she blushes and refuses to meet their eye for the remainder of the journey. She will test that respect by turning the keep upside down upon her arrival, informing them that they smell, have terrible table manners, and are generally offensive and gross. She will find an ally in the village priest or the doddering old crazy who makes whiskey and perfects his golf game. In the end, thanks to her valiant efforts, they will agree that she is quite the lady indeed and they would die for her.

   

  You shut up. I love Saving Grace.

  

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• hindsight's_a_biotch member

  

  October 2011

  I love Saving Grace too. You know I do. lol

  
  
  Click me, click me!
  
  

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• Interrobang member

  October 2011

  BeebeeEater:

  A romance novel goes like this:

  Lovely girl meets hot guy

  They do it (in roughly 75% of the cases, this starts out slightly non-consensual but always ends in mutual orgasm)

  There is an obstacle to them being together (he's too proud for love, she fancies herself interested in someone else, someone's uncle is trying to do them in and steal their fortune, etc.)

  They are freaking out about the obstacle so they do it (make sure to take up approx. 20 pages with this scene)
  

  They get past the obstacle

  They do it again to celebrate getting past the obstacle

  They hit another obstacle and this one is way worse (she's pregnant, he gets amnesia in a foreign country, she gets kidnapped, etc)

  He saves the day (it's always him that saves the day)

  They do it again and it's life-changing earth-shaking heart-stopping amazingness
  

  They get married/have a baby/live happily ever after

  MAKE SURE THEY LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!
  

  I just copied this into a Google Doc to use as the basis of my outline, lol. 

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