Trouble in Paradise
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Therapy FYI

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Re: Therapy FYI

  • I think it is safe to say that we post here because we do care.  I am glad you are taking suggestions especially regarding EAP.  Most of us are not only happy if someone takes the exact suggestion that we made.  Your anger at people here may be misplaced.
  • imagejulie324:
    I think it is safe to say that we post here because we do care.  I am glad you are taking suggestions especially regarding EAP.  Most of us are not only happy if someone takes the exact suggestion that we made.  Your anger at people here may be misplaced.

     

    Hope no one took you up on that bet because you just went from being a broke *** to a broker one if they did....lol 

  • What is helpful for me in therapy is to consider the person I am speaking to as myself, only 100% emotionally, mentally, and physically healthy. What would I expect from that interaction? That approach has worked for me in the past and I am hoping for that in my new counseling situation.
  • Can I post an FYI...not all therapists do focus on your past.  Some, particularly those who are Cognitive-Behaviourists or Solution Focused may focus more on your current actions, thoughts and behaviours in order to help out.  Just thought I'd throw that out there that's it's not all about the past and whatnot - sometimes it's more present or future focused.
    I like pineapples...they make life just so much more interesting.
  • imageReturnOfKuus:
    My therapist was like this, too.  It wasn't that she gave advice (except when it was unavoidable for any sane human to tell me that I was doing something asinine and should stop immediately), but rather that she questioned details in what I said, causing me to reexamine a lot of underlying values and assumptions that I didn't even realize I had.

    Peanut and Kuus - my experience has been very similar and I have seen a lot of personal growth. I can't say enough good things about therapy.  

  • If you feel like the damage from your childhood has been dealt with, then tell the therapist that, by all means.  If at some point you stopped feeling like a victim of your childhood, you absolutely should say so.  She'll still probably want to know what it was and how you got to that point.   

    Also, I'm wondering how you reconcile the statements that your husband may say things he shouldn't because he's a fvckface, but he isn't abusive.  I'm sure you know that not all abuse is physical. 

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  • imagedoctorwho:

    If you feel like the damage from your childhood has been dealt with, then tell the therapist that, by all means.  If at some point you stopped feeling like a victim of your childhood, you absolutely should say so.  She'll still probably want to know what it was and how you got to that point.   

    Also, I'm wondering how you reconcile the statements that your husband may say things he shouldn't because he's a fvckface, but he isn't abusive.  I'm sure you know that not all abuse is physical. 

     

    The fvckface thing was just a joke. He said something that hurt my feelings. It's not like he puts me down for everything I do, and it's not like he wasn't telling me the truth. Like I said, it was something that we talked about, and he admitted he was wrong for how he approached the situation. Trust me, physical abuse was not the only thing I got out of my childhood I also had plenty of verbal and emotional abuse as well.

  • imageILikePineapples:
    Can I post an FYI...not all therapists do focus on your past.  Some, particularly those who are Cognitive-Behaviourists or Solution Focused may focus more on your current actions, thoughts and behaviours in order to help out.  Just thought I'd throw that out there that's it's not all about the past and whatnot - sometimes it's more present or future focused.

    There's a lot of evidence that they're highly effective, especially in PTSD and abuse situations. Not to armchair diagnose, but do you have PTSD symptoms?

    Also, even the ones that focus on your past (since you seem to want to process some of it) won't force you to open up if you don't want to. Your therapy might be less effective, but if you want to draw a bright line, they'll let you. And then maybe someday you'll see how much therapy has helped, and feel a lot of trust in your therapist and finally get to unburden yourself. Or not, but starting somewhere with something is going to help a lot more in the long-run. I guess I'm saying don't be afraid to try.

    image

    "The meek shall inherit the earth" isn't about children. It's about deer. We're all going to get messed the fuckup by a bunch of cloned super-deer.- samfish2bcrab

    Sometimes I wonder if scientists have never seen a sci-fi movie before. "Oh yes, let's create a super species of deer. NOTHING COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG." I wonder if State Farm offers a Zombie Deer Attack policy. -CaliopeSpidrman
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