Trouble in Paradise
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An XP, for your amusement: My trip to the gyne this morning.

So, I don't have any vag issues or anything.  I just hate the pill, for pretty much the same reasons that anyone hates the pill, except for physically taking a pill, which I don't mind.  Anyway, I scheduled a consultation with my gynecologist, and stressed that this was NOT an exam, that I just had a few questions regarding options for contraception.  And here is how it went:

 

Him (walking in and looking at what I assumed was my chart):  So I see that you've been having trouble getting pregnant.

Me:  Whuh?  No.  I'm unhappy with my birth control, and would like to discuss other options with you.

Him:  Okay... what's making you so unhappy with it?

Me:  Oh, the usual, weight gain, low libido, dryness, screwy skin, and frequent headaches and nausea.  I'd like to stop taking hormonal birth control altogether and try something different, and I'd like your help with it.

Him:  Weight gain?  But you're on the pill.  I've never heard of anyone gaining weight on the pill.  Are you sure you're exercising and watching your diet?

Me:  You've never heard of the pill causing weight gain?  That's probably the one side effect everyone has taking the pill, in the history of everyone who has ever taken the pill.  How have you not heard of this?

Him:  Well, no one has complained about it to me.  And I don't think it should be affecting your libido, either.

Me:  Of course it does.  It does all of that, just like pregancy does.  That's how the pill works, by fooling your body into thinking you're pregnant.

Him:  *skeptical look*  Have you been taking your vitamins?

Me:  *dismissive hand wave*  We're getting off topic.  Anyway, I'd like to try FAM.  Are you familiar with this method?

Him:  Yes, it's the rhythm method.  It has a really high failure rate. 

Me:  No, not the rhythm method.  FAM.  The symptothermal method where you check your cervical position, cervical fluid, and basal body temperature to determine when you're ferile.  My husband and I would like to try that, with abstaining during the fertile periods, and using some sort of backup even when I think I'm infertile to reduce the failure due to human error.

Him:  Yes, yes, that one.  Well, you know, that fails a lot, since it depends on your periods being regular, and counting ovulation fourteen days from your last period as your fertile time.  Sometimes that varies.

Me:  *suspicious look*  Are you SURE you're familiar with FAM?  Because that's not the way it works at all. 

Him:  Yes, yes, it's what the Catholics use.  You know those Catholics, they love their gambling.  Anyway, I think you should still use hormonal birth control.  Here is a month's free supply of a different pill.  And also take this prescription for a blood test to get your thyroid checked for the cause of the weight gain, since I don't think the pill should cause that.

Me:  *head tilt*  I'll consider it.  Thanks for your time.

Medical assistant:  That will be $20.

Me:  No.  I didn't get examined.  This was just a consultation.

Medical assistant:  Those get billed the same way as regular appointments.

Me:  For a conversation?  I'm pretty sure only therapists get to do that.

Medical assistant:  I've charged it to your flex spending on your insurance card, okay?

Me:  Well, at least I'm glad I opted for on-street parking instead of your pay lot.



I'm still so annoyed that even Kuusmas music isn't helping.  It's always jarring when you go to a doctor, and realize that you're smarter than he is.  Kind of makes me wary of my health, you know?

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Re: An XP, for your amusement: My trip to the gyne this morning.

  • why do you see this idiot?
  • I hate doctors like that.  Are you going to start looking for someone more intelligent?
  • Indifferentx10000000000
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  • Why would you think you wouldn't get charged for a consultation?

    Are you some kind of reverse-whore who only pays if there is penetration of some kind?

  • O.O

    I'd definitely be switching GYNs.  

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  • Did he really say the line about Catholics and their gambling?
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  • I have not found one obgyn that has been remotely helpful with bc methods. I mentioned FAM to one last year and she handed me SIX nuvarings to try. I threw them away after seeing a zillion posters for nuvarings in her office. I saw a different one who kept assuring me that my headaches on BCPs wasn't in fact due to BCPs and that I had a neurological disorder.

    Even though I had zero headaches when I stopped taking the pill for 10 months. ZERO.

    It's best to read up on FAM and you can also check your local catholic churches for classes on the Creighton Model. They do not use temping though and it is a bit different, I don't understand why they don't use temping as it adds more information to prevent pregnancy. It's really neat though and a cool way to get to know your body. Your first few periods will be wacky off BCPs though, so don't drive yourself crazy trying to figure out what your chart, CM or temps mean during that time.  

  • Experiences like this are why I have changed gyns every year for the past 4 years. I might have found a good one this time. I will be giving her another shot.

    But, yeah, I don't know why you would think that you wouldn't be charged for a visit. Billing is different, but your co-pay will be the same for any visit.

    I agree with everything that muddled said. You should listen to her. -ESDReturns
  • I feel like GYNs are so stuck on hormonal BC and I hate it. Try the ring, try this pill, try the shot, try the Mirena.

    I don't want to use those, TYVM, so please help me with something else.

    Were you here when I told my gyne story and how she won't put in an IUD (Paraguard) into a woman who doesn't have children? I'm totally rethinking her, but in general I like her so much.

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  • imageStatlerWaldorf:
    Did he really say the line about Catholics and their gambling?

    Yeah, when I read this, you should have seen my face. lol wut?

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  • I will fly you out so you can see my OB/GYN, she's awesome and actually knows her ***. I'm surprised you hung in there as long as you did with this conversation.
  • imagepedantic_wench:

    I feel like GYNs are so stuck on hormonal BC and I hate it. Try the ring, try this pill, try the shot, try the Mirena.

    Seriously - we ovulate for 24 hours a month. MAYBE 48 hours. Why should we be in constant misery to prevent that 24 hour window from happening? This topic really irks me. I started BCPs again midway through the summer because I was having issues losing weight (I am not overweight, just felt irritated that I was trying so hard). I have some PCOS and a new obgyn thought the pill was my best option. Three months, three different pills and a ridiculous amount of headaches later and she looked at me seriously and said, "I think you should keep taking the pill because it really keeps your PCOS stuff at bay." Really lady? The best way to manage PCOS is through diet and exercise, which I do well with. And then she asked what I was using for bc when I wasn't on the pill. I told her condoms and she asked what I thought about that. Well gee, I didn't want to get pregnant so we did what we had to do because we're adults. Really? You're going to use the arguments that condoms suck so I should be in misery on bcps just so my BF can have a greater satisfaction?

    Sorry I went on that long rant - I get so upset at this topic.  

  • I had an appointment with a gyno in June that pretty much left me wtfing through the entire thing. All i wanted to do was to keep from spawning and have a bc method that wasnt going to make me a psycho freak every month but he had a pregnant couple waiting in his office that was more important so he quickly swabbed my vagina and left the room.
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  • I had an appointment with Gyno Barbie once.  She was horrible.  I left the appointment and sat in the parking lot and cried. 

    The highlights included:

    1. When I mentioned that I was having problems losing weight, she told me I was eating too much.  When I told her that I was getting around 1200 calories a day she told me I didn't know what I was eating and I just needed to quit eating all the time.  Hmm

    2. When talking about exercise, I told her that I exercised on my own because my DH was too tired when he got home from work.  At the time he was working 12-14 hour days.  She made a face and asked "Why did you even marry him?"  She repeated that statement several times even when my husband was no longer a topic of conversation.

    3.  I thought I might have an infection because I was having some problems.  She gave me an exam, then came back a few minutes later and said, "Yeah, we didn't get a sample to check.  Just don't worry about it."

    4. I couldn't see but I was fairly certain that she performed the exam with sandpaper, a sledgehammer and a machete.

    Until you are happy with who you are, you will never be happy with what you have.
  • imagefussbucket:

    Why would you think you wouldn't get charged for a consultation?

    Are you some kind of reverse-whore who only pays if there is penetration of some kind?

    BWAHAHAHA

    but you still need a new gyn.



    Click me, click me!
    image
  • I love how everyone says to talk to your doctor about this stuff, but if you actually try to do that, this is exactly what happens.  At least, in my experience with the half-dozen or more I've been to so far.  My personal favorite was the one who wouldn't give me the HPV vaccine since I definitely already have HPV.  How did she know that I definitely already had HPV?  Because I answered 1 on the "how many sexual partners have you ever had" question.  But back on topic, I wonder if your doctor has ever read the inserts that come with BCPs.  It says right on there that they can cause weight gain.

    I agree with others that you should have foreseen getting charged (in my experience consults are often more out of pocket than routine preventative care), but I also totally get feeling cheated by being charged for something so very worthless.   

    On the bright side, you don't actually need a doctor's permission to use FAM. 

  • It makes me sad that so many of you have so many bad experiences with gyns. I love mine!
    image "Evolutionary game theorists...ignoring beebees on the nest since 2005"
  • To go to pop culture on this one, what, is this guy Archie Bunker?

    Catholics love their gambling? Where'd he get that?

    Find another doc. You need somebody more intelligent, more open minded and more INFORMED.
  • Yikes, I thought my gyn appointment yesterday was bad.  I can't believe he doesn't know what FAM is.
    TTC since 07/11 Me: 32 AO PCOS/DH: 32 Lowish count/motility IUI#1-3 = BFN (Clomid, Clomid-->Femara, Injects) IVF#1 ER on 9/24 19 ER/19 M/9 F w/ICSI Transferred a 5AA and a 5BB on 9/29 Beta 10/9 = 139 Beta 10/11 = 287
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  • He totally said the gambling thing; I didn't make that up.  He said "Bingo and birth control - Catholics love their gambling."
    image
  • And I suppose he thinks if he hands out any type of birth control to a woman, it'll turn her into the town punk.
  • I don't know, but he gave me a supply of some other sort of pill for free.  Maybe he's pro-town punk.
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  • I urge you to send a copy of this to your state's licensing board.

    What a jerkoff toolshed.

    As I Catholic I now have to fight the urge to expel lettered and numbered ping-pong balls from my vag and yell BINGO!

     

     

    image
    Yeah that's right my name's Yauch!
  • This just makes me love my obgyn so much more.
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  • OMG thank you for this, I died laughing.

    Please get a new Gyno!  There are some that really know FAM and are true supporters of it.  This guy is all sorts of ignorant

  • imageTheGrimGyno:

    I had an appointment with Gyno Barbie once.  She was horrible.  I left the appointment and sat in the parking lot and cried. 

    The highlights included:

    1. When I mentioned that I was having problems losing weight, she told me I was eating too much.  When I told her that I was getting around 1200 calories a day she told me I didn't know what I was eating and I just needed to quit eating all the time.  Hmm

    2. When talking about exercise, I told her that I exercised on my own because my DH was too tired when he got home from work.  At the time he was working 12-14 hour days.  She made a face and asked "Why did you even marry him?"  She repeated that statement several times even when my husband was no longer a topic of conversation.

    3.  I thought I might have an infection because I was having some problems.  She gave me an exam, then came back a few minutes later and said, "Yeah, we didn't get a sample to check.  Just don't worry about it."

    4. I couldn't see but I was fairly certain that she performed the exam with sandpaper, a sledgehammer and a machete.

     

    WOW, just WOW

  • Tongue Tied

    Generally I have had some pretty great doctors as I am pretty picky and research them thoroughly beforehand (and ask around for positive referrals). However, I went to a doctor once (stress on the once) as my old doctor had moved, who had a similar reaction when I told him my concerns about being on the pill. I had been on it for about 10 years by that point, and while I did not have issues with weight gain, I did notice my libido was slowly decreasing and I felt to be in what I can only describe as an emotional fog. He too seemed to entirely dismiss that it was at all possible that I could experience those side effects on the pill, though I had known MANY others who had experienced something similar as well.

    I also told him I was concerned as I had very high breast cancer rates in my family (and my mother had just been diagnosed at the time at age 47) and had heard that being on the pill only increased the risk. He apparently said "no, not really a concern at all".

    I gave him a big WTF?

    Found another doctor. 

    Surprise, surprise, my libido and regular emotional life came back completely after switching to the non-hormonal IUD.

    I have had friends who suffered severe mood swings when they went on the pill, or certain brands, and had doctors try and tell them it could not be related to the pill either. Huh? They were fine before the pill and that was the ONLY thing that had changed!

    Many doctors are all eager to talk up the positive side effects (eg. reduced acne, less PMS symptoms, shorter and lighter periods) but totally seem to ignore that women may also experience negative side effects!

    I do know when I FIRST went on the pill (about 16-17 years or so ago now) the  "potential side effects" listed were a bit scant, but over the years all the effects I complained about had been added. I truly think there are many doctors who just don't update their information/knowledge OR just accept whatever the drug company chooses to tell them.


    P.S. Thanks for the PM's, I will send you an email later or over the weekend - my email account is currently being a b1tch and not loading my "compose message"!

  • imageReturnOfKuus:
    He totally said the gambling thing; I didn't make that up.  He said "Bingo and birth control - Catholics love their gambling."

    At least he has a sense of humor.

  • I never "got" bingo.

    it's still immensely popular at many many parishes.

    NFP isn't just for Catholics - there are many women who use it because they don't want to pollute their bodies with the pill and they're not crazy about a condom, a diaphragm or some other barrier method of BC.
  • Your story sounds so typical... he sounds like an idiot. I went to a gyno once who told me if I didn't have a baby before I was 25, I shouldn't bother because there is no way any woman could have a healthy baby if she's any older than that. I'm 27 now, so I guess I'll just have to take the risk!! How do some of these people get a license to practice?! Confused
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