Trouble in Paradise
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: On the verge of a divorce
No she moved about 10 months ago got married and had another baby in a different state . So right now its hard to get a job. Theres not much visitation legally I can do . But if we get a divorce H will pay me to babysit him. So i can get a babysitting contract together and I am hoping H will sign off for spousal support for a few years ,
I really can't imagine how hard this is, but I respect you a lot for making your SS a priority and for raising him the way you have.
Nope not really. He never did . Sometimes the disciplining but not so much.
" I am really sorry for the situation with your step son; it sounds like you are a good stable influence and you truly love him, which obviously makes it hard to separate from your H. Ask your attorney if you might be able to get some kind of visitation, etc with him outside of babysitting but if H will pay you and you can still see him in the process it sounds like that is best for you and your SS.
I really can't imagine how hard this is, but I respect you a lot for making your SS a priority and for raising him the way you have."
Thanks. Hopefully it works out that way.
Honestly, it sounds like your husband never really loved you. He just needed a mommy figure for his son because he didn't want to parent him. I would definitely talk to a lawyer and see if there is anything you can do about custody since you have been your SS's primary care giver for so long.
I know you love your SS very much but that isn't worth sacrificing your future for. You deserve to marry and have children with a man who is kind, considerate, patient, selfless, respectful and most of all thinks of you as an equal and not a free babysitter.
"Honestly, it sounds like your husband never really loved you. He just needed a mommy figure for his son because he didn't want to parent him. I would definitely talk to a lawyer and see if there is anything you can do about custody since you have been your SS's primary care giver for so long. "
The more I look back I 100% agree. Thank you .
The things I don't understand about this post are:
1. Your SS is 3 and you've been married 3 years, plus time before, so did your husband have an affair?
2. Why is it a big deal if your SS's grandmother wants to spend a few hours with him?
My husband would never EVER do that to me with money. When you become married there is no "mine" or "yours" it becomes "our" money, "our" house, etc. You are supposed to be a team, and you should know your husband is your biggest supporter.
I'm really disgusted by his behavior towards you. Have you sat down with him and expressed how he is making you feel? I'm sure he knows he is being an a$$ but I think you should tell him what this is doing to your feelings about yourself, him and your marriage.
If it were me, I would leave.
Sorry, 3 things I don't understand:
3. Why on earth would you consider divorcing him and then babysitting for him?
I have expressed these things to him . Which is the sad part and he just goes okay and then blows me off.
But this is my last effort these therapy sessions and then I can walk away knowing I did everything I could do and leave it on his shoulders.
Probably not. The only thing she might want would be visits during the holidays . She actually had 9 months on no contact on her part . I agree with the whole parenting thing. I mean if you think about it he works from about 7am-5:30-6pm. So I don't think he would be spending much time with SS except for weekends.
You don't need to say sorry to someone kicking you while you're down. This person should have just dismissed your typo's instead of pointing them out just to be a jerk.