Military Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: For all you moms (or moms to be..)
I went back to work full time (AD) after DS was born until I separated when he was 15 months. I took some time off with the intention of finding a job at some point. While I enjoyed and needed the time off, staying at home full time was not something I would have been happy with long term.
I started a part time job in September, and it's been a really good balance for us. I work 3 days/week. I get to use my professional skills, bring in a good paycheck, and still have plenty of time to spend with DS.
With dd, I went back to work because my xh is a deadbeat alcoholic who could not hold a job. So it was necessary that I go back to work and have a steady income.
Now that I have fi and he has a steady job, I talk a lot about staying home with the next one. I feel like I never have time with dd or time to do housework or do the grocery shopping....but a lot of that has to do with the fact that we are pretty active and like to go do things on the weekends so I'd like to be able to stay home during the week to do those things.
But in reality, I don't know if I would want to stay home every day. I might approach my boss about working 4 10 hour days instead of 5 8 hour days. I love my job and love what I do so I would have a hard time leaving even though we don't really NEED the money. But paying full price for daycare (I had state assistance with dd since we were low income) for the next one would be a huge factor in that decision. The fi travels a lot for work and is gone 2 months at a time so that would be a factor in our decision too.
Missed M/C 11/5/2010 @ 5 weeks, 3 days* D&C 12/3/2010 at 9 weeks, 3 days
Since you don't have kids yet, I can let this comment slide a little. I hope when you do have them, if you decide to use daycare, that you don't push the responsibility of raising them onto your daycare providers. The "paying someone else to raise my children" argument makes me more than a little angry.
Anyway... It's a completely personal decision dependent on a number of factors. I went back to work when my son was 9 months old. I stopped working when we moved to Hawaii because well, it's Hawaii, and I'm taking full advantage of the opportunity to live here and enjoying every minute of it. When I finish my masters, I'll go back to work if I can find a job I like in my field with hours that accommodate my son's school schedule. If I can't, I'll continue to stay home. I'm fortunate that I'm able to move in and out of the workforce depending on where we are or what I want and not because of financial necessity.
I'd like to know what else went into this study. Did the SAHMs also take college courses? Were they active in their community? Did they attend playgroups? Did they take an hour for themselves a day? Before I started doing those things, I was on a downward spiral when I first started staying home. I'm not trying to only see the tree, I'd just like to know what other factors there were.
I'm with Jilly on this sort of.
I feel like I'd go crazy being at home all day with our future baby(ies).
But it also depends if we have family around, what kind of daycare options we have, etc. If it doesn't make sense to send the baby to daycare because of how much it costs, versus how much I make, that could be an issue. But I don't that H would mind if I worked pretty much for nothing after daycare if that's what I want to do.
When I was in college, during my last semester I took only 9 hours (all that was left before I got my degree) and wasn't working. We had lots of baked goods and fancy homemade meals, but I was miserable and bored. I know having a kid wouldn't be the same thing, but I just think that when the time comes I'll want to go back to work. In my head, I have dreams of deciding that I'll stay home and join a mommy & me group or something, but honestly, I like working and can't imagine staying home for the next few years.
Also, what do you do when they go to school? As it stands right now, I don't want to be out of the workforce for 4-5 years and then have my kid go to school and have to decide what to do from there.