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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Flameful confession
This might make it to 10 pages since I'm feeling bitchy.
I don't understand when people have money problems. How hard is it to live within your means and make smart financial decisions?
My dad sexually abused me when I was a kid. I live far away in an effort to minimize how much I let him affect me. I had a good talk with my brother about my abuse and I can finally accept what happened and talk about it freely. I don't want my dad to walk me down the aisle but he is such a child and will throw such a fit I don't feel like dealing with the drama. I feel sad that he is such a bad person but even worse that I can't stand up to him about my abuse.
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Re: Flameful confession
IMO, he doesn't deserve to walk you down the isle.
And I agree, people who can't make sound financial decisions irritate me. I mean. I occasionally throw money away but we save a whole bunch of money.
I am so so so sorry about what happened to you.
big big hugs
I know he doesn't, I feel like a horrible person for wishing he would just die.
I'm so sorry to hear you're dealing with this. Your feelings are completely justified.
He's lucky to even be invited to the wedding.
ETA: I may have read your OP wrong. I just assumed he was invited since you were considering having him walk you down the aisle. But either way, he's receiving far more than he ever deserves. Do what makes you happy and try not to worry about his feelings or the drama that might come from it.
He should feel like a horrible person for what he did to you. I hate men like him, with a passion. I don't know him, nor did I know you when it happened but know this. You are a strong, beautiful woman and you are marrying the man of your dreams.
Don't let him stand in your way of your dream of being happy on y'alls wedding day.
I guess I feel it will be a better day without the drama. I can not look at the pictures of me walking down the aisle and remember the part where I married the most amazing man ever who would never abuse anyone.
KNavy- *Big ass hug* and YGPM.
I try not to be so particularly rude to certain people on here because I'm probably annoying in different ways but for the life of me I can't understand why our board has to be so "motherfvcking kumbaya". People are idiots and we have to constantly deal with their stupidity, why can't they tolerate our biitchiness.
I agree 100% sometimes I really want to give people a reality check but I know people will get upset about it.
I will say this. E-slap me if you need to. Sometimes I do need a reality check. I'm young and I need to grow up some.
KNavy, I want to hold you right now and pet your hair...in a loving way, not a creepy way.
I know you will listen to your heart on this one...not matter what you decide, it's not going to be an easy decision. I couldn't imagine...at least my sexual abuser is someone who I never have to see and most likely never will again in my whole life.
HUGE hugs, love.
And also, re: reality checks. I don't know why people are so nice...sometimes it's more harmful to be all kumbya and all to someone. For instance, with one person, I came out and was right up b!tchy to her...I'll own that. But you know what? For the first time I saw her fight for herself...she stood up to me and stood up for herself and I LOVED seeing that so much more than "oooh, haha, that's just how I am, giggle, giggle". I don't we all need to mob them and be all "OMG why are you such a loser???" but a little tough love can be a great thing.
At least you're willing... but while we're at it, please please stop saying sammich. It's like nails on a chalkboard to me.
My eslap for you is your negativity drives me crazy sometimes. Your life is what you make it, you are as happy as you want to be. Don't let the bad things take over. Remember the good things that you have in your life and be positive :-)
I wish I could say some of the things Ala says. I don't know if it's because I'm too chicken or because I feel bad hurting someone's feelings. Probably both. But I agree sometimes I dislike the kumbaya-ness as well.
Call me a cynic, but I still call bullshiit on the whole "fight back" thing.
Just ignore home completely. It may hurt, it may make you feel weird but it's for the best. Maybe have your FI walk you down the isle, or maybe your mom or grandparent.
Haha okay. I can do that
KNavy, I don't know what to say because I've never dealt with an issue like that. I'd tell you what I would do, but honestly, who am I kidding? I cannot imagine the feelings and dealing with having to "curb drama" at my wedding.
*Hugs* and I'm sorry.
Oh, I have a confession!
So, for those that saw my FB status about parents being martyrs the other day, you'll remember that a couple of people were unhappy about it. I got a few messages about how I just don't get it and how uncalled for it was....and two about how just because I'm infertile doesn't give me the right to judge parents.
Oooook....someone ate the crazycakes...needless to say, there was some unfriending involved on my part. A few said that I should just ignore or block them if I don't like what they post....well, same to you, buddy!
I won't even dignify the ones who threw infertility in the mix with a comment.
WTF? Why do people DO that? It's so...below the belt. It's been done so much that it doesn't even hurt. I mean, yes, I'm infertile and that hurts, but am I supposed to cry in my cornflakes because you used that in an argument? Yeah, no....using that just shows you haven't got the brains for a real insult.
Thank you. I've really been trying. Before H, I was a huge mess and he's helped me grow up a lot. I know I need a lot of work on myself, but I'm slowly making progress every day. I appreciate you pointing it out KNavy
If you want me to post the answer to my decision just let me know. I have nothing to hide but it's a bit long winded and will take me a minute.
You go girl!!
Call it as you want, but just bear in mind that her and I go waaay back...like, before either of us posted on this board. I've seen and been told MUCH more than she puts on here, and I just can't even handle the rolling over to take more...being all sympathetic is NOT doing her favors...at all. She needs people to get her riled because it's only then that she will get it to click that things are not ok.
I'm sorry if you don't see it that way, but like I said...there are things I've seen that are not here on the board simply because we were IRL friends.
Its because they are I secure and upset. You are so sweet, kind, and amazing they have nothing else to attack you on. I'm sorry they went below the belt. Some people can't handle the truth and you are probably better off without them around. Plus now you don't have to read their annoying status updates.
I think that's different. Your H didn't have a job and you did what you could to survive. You're also paying back what you owe instead of going out and spending a shiit ton of money on useless stuff.
I just love you so much! As does anyone who has met you
It doesn't even really bother me...I feel like it should, but it's just so lame on their part that it doesn't. And yay for no more annoying statuses!