Sex & Romance
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: The mess after Sex
I was a virgin before I met my FI and I never thought about the mess until I actually started having sex.... you justdon't see that part in the movies.
We usually end up running into the bathroom and washing ourselves off... getting back in bed, cuddle for a few and pass out. Not exactly romantic... but it's real life.
The lack of understanding regarding both female and male anatomy and biological functions in this thread is amazing. Amusing, but amazing.
Did you people not have health/sex ed in school???
Pulling out is not a deterrent of pregnancy.
There is preejaculate and you'd better believe there is sufficient sperm in it to impregnate.
And I hate the porno spelling C U M. Ugh....how about some sophistication?
Source: twoscottiesgal.blogspot.com via Amanda on Pinterest
This exactly. Actually I'm pretty sure I learned all this stuff from other girlfriends in high school and college. Maybe me & my girls were always super open about sex.
In my case, I get up after sex, MH doesn't like if I "drip" onto him. I go to the bathroom to pee (to prevent UTI) and it also helps get the sperm to drip out of the vag into the toilet. I use toilet paper to wipe any that might have run down my legs & go back to bed. If I'm around my period I will get a warm soapy cloth to clean myself & MH.
Enjoy the sex Ladies and try to get over getting grossed out by his Semen (it's the baby-makin juice lol)
my read shelf:
OK I was going to keep my mouth shut until you wrote this.
Obviously you are NOT very informed, or you would have known that this is normal, and there is no right/ wrong way. Let's hope you are not teaching in our schools....at least not sex ed!
I don't agree at all with this. I never learned in sex ed that after sex to expect a everything to ooze back out. I never knew and was like" WTF is all this?" when it did happen. Of course, I FIGURED at the time it was normal. By no means was I laying there thinking there was something really wrong with me. But I, like the OP, really wanted to ask someone about it and figure out what was a good method to deal with the mess, but none of my gfs brought it up during normal sex talk. I was too embarrassed to bring it up. I, for one, am grateful someone did on here!
Sure, I was well educated on sex, how it works, all the body parts, but no high school teacher is going to say "yeah, and ladies, you might want to keep a towel handy cuz it all comes sliding back out afterwards!" I have a degree in biology and taught at the high school level, even sex ed. I'm educated and well informed but, sorry, "what to do with the sticky mess" is not a part of the sex-ed curriculum and asking does not imply she's ignorant about sex.
Did your minor in comprehensive sex ed cover how birth control works? Unless you're using some kind of female barrier method, though saying you're "on" birth control makes me automatically think of BCPs.
This totally reminds me of a time when I was younger and knew about menstruation but not much else. My neighbor said something about using a tampon and her mom freaked out and said 'you know those things can get lost up there! Don't ever use them!" I was confused for quite a bit after that one.
Thanks for backing me up on this! Of course the curriculum does not teach about the "mess after sex" however it does teach youth about the correct ways on how to put on a condom and all 18 steps (yes, all 18 steps) usually when you are teaching youth you don't teach them about the "mess after sex without using a condom" because we always want them to be safe and use condoms do they shouldn't have to deal with fluids being transferred between partners!!
Thank you all for your input I did not realize how well this would be taken. I did not expect 42 comments. But I am very happy with everyones responses!! Thank you all very much I hope each of you have learned something from this:)
Thanks again,
I guess you missed the point...of course they dont teach you that part in school...but if she has a minor in the topic im sure they didnt spend ALL the classes talking about how to put a condom on the correct way. If you are supposedly "well informed" you should know what happens to bodily fluids.
NO where did i say she should have learned that in HS sex ed class...i said if she is an expert on it, you know enough to teach kids, she should know a little bit about the topic.
I have been working at the HS level for MANY years and I have heard many questions that might have some clutch their pearls, but I would hope the person teaching the class would be informed enough to give the correct answer!
Not unless someone in her class asked that question. I've never heard this question from anyone else before except from this post. So if no one in her class asked this specific question, and we know this topic is not taught, and the OP has never had that experience due to using condoms, then how could she have become informed?
I still feel this topic of fluid leaking out after is not something you would know about unless you actually experienced it. You can't cover every possible experience when training to teach sex ed, so I the best answers are going to come from people with the most experience. OP finally experienced this particular situation, and decided to ask us about it.
Now she is informed.
In Sex Ed, they taught us that the semen and sperm would travel up into all our various lady bits and would be practically guaranteed to start a pregnancy the first time if we weren't using birth control. They did not mention that actually 99% of it falls out and will make it completely impossible to fall asleep afterwards (like all 16-year-olds think you are supposed to do afterwards, at least the ones who are still virgins and planning to wait until they aren't sneaking around after school to do it), because there is enough of it to make a basketball-sized wet spot that will get cold. I knew something wet was going to come out of his penis, but I had no concept of the amount, and since my vagina is a wet place to begin with, I didn't automatically assume that a wet vagina means a dripping vagina.
I think women should know this, and a great many other things, before they start having sex. But many of us didn't have any opportunity to learn it before learning it first hand. This one especially flies in the face of everything young people hear about sex in our popular culture.
We keep a stack of washcloths next to the bed, which helps a lot. Still, if we go to bed right after sex, no matter how much I wipe and whatnot, I still find once I get back into bed, there's an annoying drip-drip-drip between my legs that makes it hard to fall asleep. I've taken to sticking a washcloth inside my panties to soak it up, but that's kind of scratchy. So now I have a soft cotton pad designed as a reusable menstrual pad to use instead.
This made me laugh so loud my DDs were wondering what I was laughing at. Uhhhh... I said I was laughing at your siggy pic (it is a very cute pic btw).
I wasn't suggesting pulling out as a method of birth control. Where did you get that? I was suggesting pulling out as a way to make clean-up easier. Wasn't that was the original post was about? The one from the poster whose husband ejaculates inside her, so she obviously isn't currently relying on condoms for birth control? If she was currently trying to conceive, she might want all the precious semen in her vagina to increase the chance of conception.
I will make my best effort to speak of semen in a more sophisticated manner. Perhaps you could work on learning that context is a important part of reading comprehension.
For years we kept little washcloths, ect next to the bed for just this "clean up" situation. But after our first child was born, the wipey warmer was on my nightstand for diaper changes, and it became our go-to preferred method. My husband has declared that the wipey warmer will still be in use for years and years, but because it is just such a easy and warm way to do the post-*** clean up!
Wow. I'm so glad OP posted this! I don't like the leak. I also do the diaper thing as pp said haha...I have two questions though...
1. You aren't supposed to feel it when he ejaculates are you?
2. How much is supposed to leak out without pushing it out?
ETA: Rewording