Seattle Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Non Clicky Poll s/o being off the hook.
How much information do you share with family about reproductive/family matters? To me it is personal and no one else needs to know. We got into a mini argument about this last night.
For example - do you tell families if you are trying? Planning on having kids? Not having kids?
Re: Non Clicky Poll s/o being off the hook.
My parents know where I stand because my mom is nosy.
H's parents know probably because my mom is complaining to his mom.
Im of the firm belief that my uterus is my business, but I guess it doesn't always work out that way.
eta: no one in either of our families know that we're getting sterilized this year and I intend on keeping it that way
my mom randomly called me today to chat about a cake that she made last summer.. and about how it fell apart becuase it was so hot in yakima..
anyway.. she asked if i was losing weight because i want to have a baby.. then she told me that a baby girl is really more work than a boy and harder to carry.. lol she is losing it.. hahahha
but otherwise, no one knows if we're trying or what. we're not telling our family.
they know we WANT kids some day.. they just don't know when that day will be!
If I have my way, I will not be telling my parents until I can't hide it any longer. My IL's will know as soon as we can tell them.
♥ bfp1 06/14/2011 ♥ edd 02/22/2012 ♥
♥ baby jennlin born on 02/15/2012 ♥
who says you can only wear your wedding dress once?
honeymoon bio ♥ married bio ♥ planning bio
jumped ship to the new and improved nest. back to TB for baby boards.
wait... they don't know you have a baby? i thought we had this talk? lol. or are you talking about ttc?
He is getting a lil big to hide I would say
Nope.
And, I'm sorry. *hugs*
They know about Edmund but any future children I won't be telling them about for a long while. When they found out that Edmund had a cleft lip and palate my mom and grandma both told us that we shouldn't have any more children.
Thank you.
His mom keeps asking me questions and I swear one day I am going to go postal on them. I also swear she waits until I have been drinking.
Our families both know that we're planning on having a kid before I'm 30 - so sometime in the next few years. My mom, his dad and his grandma are I think the most excited for it to happen sooner vs later haha. We haven't told them anything beyond that, and probably won't.
ETA: I take that back...I have a feeling he *might* tell his dad when we're TTC because he and his dad are super close like that, and chances are if we're TTC for longer than a couple months, it'll slip to my mom and aunt, again because we're weirdly close haha.
If it makes you feel any better, my mom and I were screaming at each other one day while I was at work. Thank goodness I have my own office and was able to shut the door, because there was a lot of crying and yelling.
that is some b.s. if you ask me!
i'm sorry both of you guys! therickson- does your h not want kids either? or you guys are just unsure right now?
We didn't tell anyone when we started TTC. Well...kinda. DH told his mom that our plan was to start when we went to Hawaii. I could've killed him.
We told our families and a lot of our friends when we had our first m/c (we'd told our families I was pregnant). And the second. So because a lot of people know our history, they don't ask questions. That part is actually pretty nice....they just leave us alone.
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"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain."
Ew! (to what your mom and grandma said). I have a family member who frowns on DH and I having our own kids because DH and I both have some OCD/sensory issues and she doesn't want that to pass on to our kid(s). It's really weird what people will tell you about how to handle your life.
I'm sorry, that sucks. Parents can be lame and difficult.
#1-BFP 08-22-09 ~ M/C 08-31-09 at 5 weeks 6 days
#2-BFP 08-6-11 ~ Due 04/18 ~ born via c-section April 22, 2012
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My mom and I are very close; I tell her everything. When we first started TTC I tried not to tell anyone b/c I didn't want any pressure; I told my mom the first time we saw each other in person. I don't talk that way with the rest of my fam, but they all know we want kids, sooner than later.
therickson: Sorry, that sucks. If I was in your situation, I think I would tell our immediate fam -- I'd probably need support too, but beyond that it's no one's business and I wouldn't want anyone talking about it. But, everyone's fams are different and our relationships are different.
catbus: Congrats!
sounder: That's horrible!
my parents, brother, and sister know our timeline, and I'll definitely keep them posted when we're ttc. my sister will be the first person to know after DH (maybe even before him
). she was also the first to know that we got engaged.
DH's mom knows our timeline, and we probably won't tell her, but won't deny either.
when I was stranded in socal, got pretty drunk with DH's dad and stepmom, and discussed our plans and names for our child and raising kids, haha.
My mom knows our general timeline, but I don't think she's specifically asked.
I don't plan on announcing anything when we do start trying. I can understand how it would make it more stressful and I like the thought of it being a surprise when we do announce a pregnancy.
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therickson: I'm sorry. That must be really hard. ((hugs))
SoundersChick: That's just awful. I don't feel like anyone has the right to tell people they should or should not have kids.
Avila: I'm sorry about what you went through, but I am glad your family leaves it alone.
Catbus: Congrats!!
UW: I'm sorry you and your mom were screaming at each other.
I'm about to lose it with my mom. Every single time I talk to her (about once a week), the conversation always turns to kids and how I shouldn't even be thinking about having them until I move back to the east coast (which we don't plan on doing for another 3-4 years) and completely refuses to accept that we're not having any. I've tried shutting down the conversation, even to the point of hanging up on her several times. She doesn't get it. She's gotten so nasty about it too, starting to say things like, "Well, you shouldn't have kids anyway, because x, y, z..."
But to answer therickson's OP - not planning to have them at all. We've told both our families this. H's parents totally get it and are cool with whatever we want. H has 2 brothers, so still lots of opportunity for grandkids. My dad couldn't care less what we do, and, as I just said, my mom refuses to get it.
It is totally your right to tell them or not. I wouldn't worry about it. It is your business and you are not wrong. Everyone always just assumes that people are just going to get pregnant. Nobody ever thinks that people may not be able to. Kind of sucks! Do what you feel comfortable with!
Lol, this! That is what I am doing right now. I am a bigger girl and I can't imagine gaining more weight to carry around once I get pregnant. Time to get fit!
That is horrible! I am so sorry. I agree with you, they don't deserve to know. My brother had a cleft palate and it's so hard when people judge.
So I made an announcement last year at my 30th bday party that H and I would be pregnant by a year. That year is coming up this June and we plan on going full steam ahead. So all of our family knows, my mom knows that we are actively trying but I figure the rest of our family assumes we are. Once we're pg, I can't wait to spread the news. The only one I'll be nervous to tell will be FIL. He for some reason is all about 'why don't you wait a few years? Why does it have to be now?' And I can't stand it! Not his business, we have the financial means to take care of a child, we have extensively planned how to raise, planned out babysitting already, I know, I'm kinda OCD when it comes to planning, but he still resists. Well too fu&*ing bad! He once said he was too young to be a gpa. Get a life.