Family Matters
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Highly (yet irrationally) Pissed! (long!)
When did I say I didn't love my brother? Of course I do! And nor do I consider them a project. I looked for jobs for him because he asked me too and I wanted to help him. I did those nice things because I WANTED to, not because I felt obligated. I have enjoyed the time getting to know my brother's girl friend - and she enjoys it as well since she tells me all the time how much she loves getting together. Just because a small part of me is aggravated at the situation and I chose here to vent should not cause me to be labeled with a bad heart. Yeah a SMALL part of me is is ticked at the situation, but the other 95% is ecstatic that my family has this beautiful baby to love and dote over. I carry a lot of hope that this helps him to mature and I will be here for them in whatever way they need me to be out of love for my brother and my precious little niece. Yeah, I may be up front and honest about the fact that he is lazy and needs to grow up, and I may not agree with the choices he makes - but that in no way means I don't have compassion for him, love him and want things to work out for him. I very much hope things start falling into place for him and the family he has created...and I will be here to help them should they need or ask for it. **Please don't mistake anyone's three paragraph rant out of aggravation as in depth look at someone's character.**** Its comments like these I think that stop people from posting. I didn't ask for advise or judgement - I specifically asked for you to keep your judgement to yourself. I feel like people should respect that and post negative things on those topics where people have ASKED for your opinion. I did not. .......Thank you to those who have expressed encouragement and withheld your negative judgement. You are the reason I enjoy this site.
Re: Highly (yet irrationally) Pissed! (long!)
Doing "nice" things doesn't override the bad heart (jealousy, entitlement, judgement) from whence character stems.
Look, I have the same brother and nearly the same situation. But I love him, no matter his choices in life, and I will always lead with compassion, hope, and confidence that he'll come around. Never once have I felt the emotions you have.
On another note, you may want to reconsider some boundary issues. He is not your "project", and it is not your job to fix him or his coordinate life. Give him and his family some room to act; they may just surprise you.
There. Don't you feel better already? You've already come around from an irrational tirade that makes you look small to realizing what a small fraction of you -- 5%? --actually feels bothered. Indeed, you're even ecstatic! Fabulous.
(And it's redonkulas to expect not to be judged. Hello, you wanted the attention, that's why you made the post in the first place.)
Perspective. It's a life-saver.
you need to get over yourself - let things be what they will be - you can't change what happened nor what is going to happen - enjoy the fact that you will be an aunt, your parents will be grandparents and you brother will be a dad - this is a life chaning event for all - maybe he will suprise you the most. Just try to stop taking the joy out of this and enjoy.