Relationships
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Future Husband is traveling with a female friend, without me!
WHAT ?
Hell No, that wouldn't happen, especially if I wanted to go too. OP, stop being so wishy washy and trying to play the role of the cool fiancee. Tell him your true feelings about how inappropriate this is. If he is willing to upset you more than his old friend, well then I suppose you can see where his priorities truly lie.
I haven't read any of the responses so take what I say with a grain of salt.
No way in hell.....
there, dinner, a movie, game, concert, whatever is fine. A week long vacation, with an old fling (no matter how long ago it happened) no way in hell. Why aren't you included in this vacation? Why is he vacationing with her and not you? Something isn't right? Have you voiced your concerns to him?
I am engaged due to get married this year and we are in the same age bracket. We have a very healthy and trusting relationship but let?s face it - why play with fire? I do not care how much you trust one another and how well you two communicate etc. That situation is very inappropriate and you have every right to feel the way you feel. Who in their right mind would be okay with that set up? Its plain out wrong and you most certainly need to voice your concerns to him and explain to him how you feel and that you feel terribly hurt that he would even consider such bogus @!$^&+. Good Luck but I am not so sure I could even walk down the isle with someone who feels that?s okay and don?t trust that heffa. Oops ? did I just say HEFFA (LOL) What?s wrong with her to even consider going knowing that he is engaged?
I think you are crazy if you let him go. Why can't you go together? Don't be surprised if they sleep together. Going to concerts, drinking at pubs, you are far away, not married yet and she is single and has nothing to lose.
How do you know she doesn't still have feelings for him? maybe she realized what she lost and is lonely now too, especially if she is older...... How would he feel if you did this to him?
Hi All -
OP here. After freaking out a bit, I thought about why I was freaking out. Some people indicated that I didn't trust her (which is not the case) or I didn't trust him (also not the case.) The fact is, part of their relationship makes me insecure because they did hump 20 years ago, and because he has known her so much longer than he knows me. While he did wrong booking this trip, my insecurities played a big part in it.
(Also, FYI they were not going to Europe. They are both originally from England, living in the states, and FH was flying out to California for a week so they could be groupies for 90's English Band)
So... that night (the night before he left) I laid it all out. The trip makes me feel insecure, it makes me feel uncomfy. Yes, you (addressed at FH) used go on trips with her all the time before when you were in previous relationships, but you are getting married now, and its different. He asked me how he can make it right... and I told him not to do it again. He agreed. And then went on the trip.
And you know what? It was nice to have the house to myself a little bit. I'm in grad school and got a lot done. And it is true... absence makes the heart grow fonder.
So.. I wasn't trying to be wishy-washy, but just had multi-faceted feelings. And no... I don't believe for a second that they banged.