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random vent
no place else to post this story, so i'll be a crankus about it here and invite you to post your own Friday randoms/vents/whatever.
We are going out to visit the ILs for the first time in their new house this weekend. I know, shoot me now. In an effort to be a nice DIL, I called FIL early this week to say how excited we were. I also offered to drop by Whole Foods this week and pick up any goodies for them. I know they used to shop there a lot and since there isn't one in their new area, I thought it would be nice if I could get a few of their favorite things. I was thinking unique stuff---WF brand spaghetti sauce, maybe, or a snack mix, or a special brand of tea. You know. Small goodies. He doesn't really thank me, and deflects to SMIL, who emails me a list of things to buy. I print it and don't look at it until I'm standing in WF yesterday.
She wants me to buy at least 8 different kinds of organic raw nuts, 2 pounds each. First of all, this is horseshit she can just buy in bulk online. Secondly, each of these nuts is like 10-11 bucks a pound!!!! If I got it all for her, it would be over a hundred bucks!!! 
I bought about half of it and figured I would just tell her they didn't have the rest. It came to 65 dollars. I hadn't intended to ask for money back, but now I'm wondering if I should accept if they offer.
Something is seriously wrong with those people.
Re: random vent
Definitely accept it if they offer. That is crazy.
I was at a state meeting this week and apparently, to add to the secular v religious (being TIC), "How the Grinch Stole Crhistmas" is now a religious book?? Just odd. As is anything with the Easter Bunny.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I'm going to add, though - as she actually did that, I wouldn't be surprised if the next time you go, they just assume you'll pick stuff up for them again. If that happens and if this time they don't offer or you don't accept $$, be prepared - you will want to reply with something to the effect "Based on the prices last time, I'd expect this to come to about $___. Is that what you expect, or would you rather me work w/ in a certain $$ amount? I just want to make sure I don't go over your budget/what you expect to pay.". To make is clear that you aren't buying it for them.
AND when you get there, have DH give the stuff to them and have HIM ask for the $$.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
omg wtf do they need all those nuts for!?!??
This Disney trip is going to kill me. I think I'd rather plan another wedding versus email about this mofo anymore. We are only in Disney for 3 days, people!!!!
We are going to a wedding on Saturday and our anniversary is on Sunday and I can already tell DH is trying to pick a fight with me. Yes, lets fight through yet another anniversary that culminates in yet another awkward anniversary dinner. ::sigh::
The wedding we are going to is in Hick-ville, USA and I'm totally not looking for to slumming it with a bunch of hicks tomorrow. For instance, the reception is BYOB. I'm so glad I didn't waste $$ on a new dress or lavish wedding gift for these people.
ECB, that was my worry. If we do it once, they will ask us to do it again. She's already got us stopping halfway to pick up some things from her friend, who lives on the way. No big deal, happy to help, but the point is she won't hesitate to ask.
She's just an epic failure in the "social cues" area, that's all. I really hate to take money from them---that wasn't my intent. I wanted to do something nice. But seriously, 65 bucks could have bought the baby carrier I was waiting to jump on. Also.....this is their new, 1.2 million dollar home we are going to visit.....for whatever that's worth.
Ringstrue, who are you going to Disney with? Sounds like....family. Given that it is stressful. :-( Sorry. Good luck with everything!
yes - 12 family members in all. My half siblings' mom is coordinating the whole thing and calling her a planner is the understatement of the year. Shes paying for EVERYTHING so I'm not complaining in general its just - a lot. Plus, hi? I have an almost 3 year old who does things like nap and throw tantrums.
Them MIL wants to tag along for 1.5 days and fitting her in is a kink in the chain. We can do it its just - again - a lot.
Not to quite the same degree, but my IL's are kind of a "if you give an inch, they'll take a mile" people. If this will lead to bigger problems, then nip it in the bud as early as you can!
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
As much as I complain about my ILs, they are almost the opposite of this. I went to Toys R us with MIL a few days ago to grab a few baby things and she paid for everything. Go to Costco, same thing. The lady seriously bought my groceries.
If you refuse, they see it as rude. And they've got the $$, so its not like its a burden on them, I just feel awkward.
Similar. I was eyeing the K'Tan breeze, which I thought might be good for summer (part of it is mesh). But I wouldn't say no to a Moby if you are offering! That's really sweet of you. Was it the tying that you were hung up on? I am curious to hear your experience.
If you want it, I will stick it in the mail tomorrow...I have been trying to give it to any takers for some time
. It was the tying. I never felt like it was snug enough. LT had some neck strenght issues until about 3 months so it probably added to my ineptness as we were constantly working with him to improve it/hold it correctly (he looked left a lot). PM me your address.
Missusbee, if you were only thinking of a couple items and instead got sent a giant list, I'd have your DH ask for the $$, especially if $ is tight for you. I would want to avoid the precedent being set. That's crap.
I got so frustrated last night at the utter lack of personal responsibility of one of my students. I told them all to check their grades Monday and let me know if they had questions. One girl waited until last night (after I formally submitted them to the system) to question one of hers. Turns out she had a doctor's note which would give her points back I took off for missing a meeting. However, in trying to figure this out, she told me "You need to tell me what the date was I missed." then later "You need to come get my doctor's note."
No. YOU needed to turn the doctor's note in to me when you actually missed your meeting. You need to have some personal accountability and needed to check this when your group marked you absent. You needed to check this on Monday/Tuesday/Wednesday like I told you to. And you also need to stop telling ME what I need to do in this situation.
I told her she can scan the note in and email it to me. Because I'm not going out of my way at this point to get this note from her that she should have given me in March. Mean? Maybe. But I'm so tired of this half-assed bullshiits.
Emily, you're not mean. Actually you're quite nice. If I were in your position, I would have just said "too late", outlined the policy that she failed to adhere to, and called it a day.
Annie----you got it! Thank you!
Anything you can achieve through hard work, you could also just buy.
I would definitely not want to start setting that precedent, how annoying. "Can I pick something up for you" equals in my mind their favorite cereal that you can only get a WF or whatever. Not random nuts.
DH's aunt sells nuts at whole foods lol. Not on the east coast though (she is based in Kansas.) It's funny to me bc she started doing it as a hobby and now her pistachios are apparently super popular in Kansas and Missouri, so good for her I guess, but its so random.
I'm still pregnant. That's my whine for the day. I know I know. I'm not even 40 weeks yet. I shouldn't be whining etc. But I can barely walk bc my feet are so swollen and when I do walk its in my flip flops bc they are the only shoes that fit, and then it hurts my back bc I don't have enough support. It's such a lose-lose situation, sigh.
My boss's daughter was due on Sunday with her first and she had the baby yesterday. I think. At our meeting at 130 she was 8 cm dilated and then after that around 230 she was pushing. I know these things because our boss SHARES THIS INFORMATION. It makes me so thankful my father is an electrical engineer who open his office door at work so people know he is there, or else weeks could go by and they wouldn't know whether he was there or not.
I am also going to punch my mom if she says one more time that "you will have the baby this weekend." (she has said that the past three weekends.) He'll come when he comes and saying its this weekend just gets my hopes up.
I'm in a bad mood about this in case you all couldn't tell. I'm getting a pedicure today bc goddamnit I deserve one.
You know what works as a summer carrier? Moby-style?
Go to the fabric store, buy 5-6 yards of cotton gauze. If you don't know what it is, the nice people at the fabric store will. You can pick a pretty color and everything.
Split it lengthwise down the middle. If it's too much, cut the length down.
Bingo. Done. And you have one to give a friend.
If you're fancy, you can hem it. I didn't, and I used the carrier like this with both my kids (not all the time, as we had other carriers, but still). Way lighter than a Moby (which is great to learn on because the material is stretchy, but it does get hot in the summer).
There are a bunch of tutorials on line for how to knot carriers. There are instructions that come with the Moby, but they are by far not the be all and end all in instructions.
I am the 99%.
This makes me so sad! How horrible!!!!
Yeah our mindset is to go at M's pace and if others happen to be along for the ride, so be it. My 2 youngest siblings are self-centered students so they could easily blow us off whenever. We aren't going to try to stay together too much (I think we've all been on too many vacations to assume that would work) but as long as we catchup with eachother at meals or a few moments duringthe day we'll still feel "together".
Is 2 years, 10 months too young for the log ride??
This sounds like way more trouble than buying one online. haha. I don't sew but my mom does though so maybe I could convince her to do something like that for me.
s/o carriers - I have a moby, and I have an Ergo (with an infant insert). Will both be too hot for the summer? what about a "ring sling" or something?
buying a piece of fabric and making one cut is too much trouble? I know you're super pregnant!
I am the 99%.
My ILs are like this, but we put the kibosh on it. It's hard to describe, but for them it was wrapped up in this inability to recognize that DH and I are adults, and it was a weird part of a larger respect issue (respect of boundaries, respect of our right to make decisions for us and our kids, respect for our ability to take care of ourselves...). I pointed it out to my FIL that he got absolutely offended once when we paid for his Father's Day dinner, yet he expected us to not only take his cash but greatly appreciate him for it.
We went through a period where there was a sh!tload of tension over this and other "autonomy" issues, but once we got through it our relationship overall with them is much improved. It's weird to explain, though, on the surface it always seemed like "They're trying to be nice! What's your problem?".
Going to the fabric store sounds like too much trouble hahaha. Maybe I will try after the birth though. Do you just tie it around you then?
*predicts May 9*
Just because that's my birthday, and my friend had to go and have her baby on May TENTH last year.
40/112
MissusBee, MAYBE they totally intended to pay you back the whole time. I hope so. They thought pick up meant "do our shopping at whole foods as a favor and we will reimburse you" rather than the actual BUYING/paying as the favor?
Sadly, though, I can picture the kind of people who would just expect you to give it to them. Tons of people are just clueless. *SMH* Maybe clueless isn't the word. A combination of clueless and entitled? I can't even tell you how many times I've seen people/had people assume I or someone else will bend over backwards to do something for them without any reciprocation. Really, it's a FAVOR. Someone shouldn't be inconvenience by it more than they need or want to be!
40/112
:::shudder::: I remember that time, and it was awful. I'm pretty sure I have a scar on my abdomen because I was so sick of people badgering me that I agreed to an induction I had no business having. And I think it was a worthwhile trade off.
rings, the absolute WORST Disney trip I've ever been on was a group trip that I planned in college. I was given a mission to make it low cost. I fit 10 people into 2 rooms at a Super8 and brought a cooler full of coldcuts. When people were complaining on the walk back to the hotel for lunch, I almost killed them.
Guys, I have actual WORK to do today. Doesn't anyone know it's Friday?!?!
MB, your ILs....shudder...
My vent is that I'm sad no one has commented on my awesome new siggy pic
Anything you can achieve through hard work, you could also just buy.
Tartaruga, i can't see your siggy pic. sorry, my work hates you.
missus-get some dolla bills from the crazies.
I got my knock off moby off etsy, and i really liked it. i'm looking at an ergo this time around, though. there are a TON of videos on youtube re: moby tying. check it out.