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Consequences of Selfishness (long)
So, this may seem a bit strange, but one thing I decided to try in 2009 was to be more selfish.
DH and I drove from CA to NE and back between Dec 16 and Dec 24. In those endless hours at the wheel, we were able to have quite a few difficult conversations, there was no way to escape. One topic I decided to bring up was that I wanted to do something outdoorsy and fitness-related each weekend. I wanted to see all the natural wonders of Southern California since it looks like we'll be moving elsewhere within 1.5 years.
DH didn't really think that was a good idea. In fact, DH got really upset and said that it was stupid and that we didn't have the resources or the time. Unfortunately, I have been feeling a lack of connection with nature and we've been letting ourselves get very out-of-shape. So I told him, well I'll do it regardless and you're welcome to come along.
Where is the line between what I want and what's best for both of us. What we usually do on weekends is DH goes to bed drunk after staying up late with his friends while I go to bed and get up early wanting to do something. It's a nightmare trying to get DH out of bed and the soonest we can go anywhere together is like 3:00pm! I know, I know, I knew this when I married him, but isn't a good wife supposed to try to steer the relationship in a healthy direction. Shouldn't one half of a couple be able to push the other half? Am I being selfish? Am I "leading by example?"
So far, I've been riding my bicycle around town and DH meets me at a destination with the car. I guess it's a compromise but when is it OK to push him?
Re: Consequences of Selfishness (long)