August 2006 Weddings
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: If you kept your maiden name....
You didn't! Just wanted to clarify in case I seemed insensitive.
okay. You can come to my birthday again (and that's how kids makeup at my school)
I've heard of the girls getting mom's name and boys getting dad's name.
Different names are NOT a big deal, especially in our area. People are so accustomed to it, it doesn't even raise an eyebrow. School forms, doctor forms, everything has a space for mom's full name and dad's full name. There is no assumption that they are the same.
And I certainly would not make a major life decision like naming my kid based on the convenience of their future soccer coach's assistant.
Ditto Marquis and whoever said they changed their last name b/c of the kid issue. I wanted to do something different but it's a huge hassle not to have a family name. So I sucked it up and changed mine although I rarely ever use it. IMO Hyphenation is the way to go if you kept your name (except for blended families which is a different scenario) or perhaps making someone's last name a middle name for each child. I get hassled picking up my DH's dry cleaning b/c I typically use my maiden name. I'm sure it's much worse with a child.
ETA (b/c my post makes no sense in this thread)
I just think your life will be much easier if all your kids have the same name and also the name(s) of the parents. Hassle aside, I personally wouldn't want people assuming my kids weren't my H's (and they would if they didn't have his name).
Marquis was just giving one example of the inconveniences. Just b/c places allow for different names that doesn't eliminate the headache parents and others will have to deal with. It's good to anticipate all the different aspects of a kid's life that will be affected by having different last names b/c it's not like a parent is going to want to change the name when the kid's in elementary and they're sick of the hassle.
The biggest reason I kept mine legally is because I have professional-related things attached to it.
Socially I go by DH's last name -- but I also will go by mine as well as a combo.
The kids will have his last name
Haven't figured out how we'll deal with school paperwork, but I'll probably make it: Shoshana Mylastname Hislastname
Hope that helps.
Adam & Shoshie 10-21-07: "My family is big and loud and everybody's in each other's lives and business. ... but wherever I go, they will always be there." * My Blog: Tales of a Hopeful Jewish Mom to Be *