Why is it so dead here?!

jajsundevil

Skittle128:

And also, if you are wondering why things might seem cliquy, then you might want to think about how it might look when someone posts a question about why it's dead in here, and you immediately respond with "you got a private message"

Because that doesn't seem cliquy at all...

I feel like announcing P.M.'s (especially regarding a question like she just asked) only perpetuates the cliquiness of this board.

This was my thought too.

xxSOMMERxx

Wow...

 

This totally turned into Drama-Fest 2010 within 60 minutes!

 

I haven't been around because working full-time and taking 5 courses in school keeps me plenty busy.

 Also, I used to visit this board quite frequently because it was somewhat of a drama free zone.  But, that seems to have changed over the past few months.  This is just the interweb people!  Things can be taken out of context very easily and misinterpreted.  So relax, things don't always come out the right way!

 If someone say's something that you might think is offensive PM them, and take it up with them.  The worst thing you could do is respond to it so others can see and add their .02.  

 

shawnana

jware1985:

Here are my thoughts, people can sit there and act like they weren?t B!tchs that is all fine and good because you know what ever helps you sleep at night,  But I think sitting there and thinking you are all tough and big and bad and almighty powerful or the innocent ones is complete and utter bullsh!t. 

 

I think whatever happened before Cheesecake factory carried over and I think people need to own up to what they did and said? not acknowledging people making comments ?I am not going over to that table because I don?t like people at that table?. Umm? what?  Then these same people are the ones to call others immature? uh ok? here is the reason for the clickyness? I will just lay it on the table because honestly some of you hated me before you even meet me and that?s cool and I don?t see that changing anytime soon... nor do I really care because some of you never tried to get to know me.

 

There was a post about TTTC and Vanessa you went off about how Stacy (sorry to bring you up Stac) shouldn?t be drinking and should take prenatal?s and it hasn?t been that long and she doesn?t even have a real problem and blah blah blah? then other people joined on that ban wagon? well I got defensive because Stacy is a good person and didn?t deserve to be knocked down when she was already feel blue about a very sensitive subject to a lot of people all for very different and VALID reasons! Just saying

 

Then I post something on Facebook about protestors and Vanessa, Jess and Jennifer got their ?panties in a twist? because comments they had posted were not there? oh and then started talking about it on their boards but then called me immature? uh ok! And for the record on this one, I saw the emails of what you guys had posted it and if they had been their I would have deleted them because they were insanely offensive!  

 

I have no problems with anyone on this board; I don?t know most of you to have a problem with you, or to dislike you or to ignore you or anything like that? This is the internet and I think people like to act one way online and another in person.  But I am not that way. Sorry I am just not.

 

I deleted a few people off Facebook frankly because I was tired of see things that were obviously talking sh!t about me or others? so I deleted it so I wouldn?t have to see it. Simple as that?.

 

I think if people really want to figure out why it got ?clicky? and move on then there you go, this is a public board we can all get along. We don?t need to be ignoring people?s post for being fearful of people getting their panties in a twist or whatever! It doesn?t matter we are all grown adults and maybe we should all just start acting like it instead of all this bullsh!t drama because honestly there are much bigger problems in the world.

 

Flame away!

Okay, so I wasn't involved in the previous TTC tiff.  But, I do find it interesting how everytime NesJas posts something it seems as though (and this is my perception) you are the first to take it offensively and say something that could be interpreted as snarky back to her.  Which, I think it's kind of funny, considering you were standing up for Stacy, and yet I don't see Stacy doing that.  Again, this is my perception.  I won't speak for others. 

As for the Cheesecake gtg, I know that I didn't make an effort to go to the other table and say hello.  I fault myself in that.  It wasn't because I didn't like the girls at the other table, I didn't know most of them (except for a few).  I tend to be somewhat shy in some social settings, and I chose to stick to my comfort zone. And as for people not making efforts to go to the other table, that goes both ways.  Whatevs, it would be hypocritical of me to lay blame on others when I didn't make an effort.   

I also agree with the previous comments on the immediate YGPM messages... I believe that definitely adds to the clique feeling.  I understand the occasional need for a PM.  But in response to a public post?  Really? 

There will always be disagreements.  There will always be people you don't like or whatever.  I guess it's in how you move on from it.

homespunmetier

okay soo it seems like mostly everyone agrees that its gotten alittle cliquey/tense/dramaish....lets move on...

theres quite a few prego ladies, new moms, ladies that arent looking to get k/ued but like kids (me lol), and ladies ttc, the weather is getting cooler, how about a baby shower type g2g at a park - ramada picnic????

NewYorkerinAZ

homespunmetier:

okay soo it seems like mostly everyone agrees that its gotten alittle cliquey/tense/dramaish....lets move on...

theres quite a few prego ladies, new moms, ladies that arent looking to get k/ued but like kids (me lol), and ladies ttc, the weather is getting cooler, how about a baby shower type g2g at a park - ramada picnic????

Awww, that is SO nice of you to even think of! Seriously. Even if I wasn't one of the PG ladies, I'd still think that was super sweet. That would be fun but I wouldn't expect it at all.

jj4ever04

I agree with what a lot of you guys are saying. Me personally, I needed a break so I immersed myself in work and other daily activities. I'm not miss popularity nor do I wish to be but i tend to be a private person and don't air my personal business on the board. My friends IRL constantly get butt hurt when I draw into myself while I work things out. I always come back though

I also totally get the comment about getting busy and not commenting on something someone posted. I've only started lurking again about a week and wanted to comment but then my phone at work rang and I got busy. Then when I came back to much time lapsed and I thought "well I'm too late to comment" so i didn't

I will however vow to be better about commenting. If only to get this board moving again. This is my break from work so I don't get burned out

JenniferBultman

So if no one has meant to be clique-ish and no one has intentionally meant to offend anyone I vote that we just move forward and if someone gets their panties a twisted we let them work it out? We've got way to much to celebrate/support/look forward to to let this be our focus!

LizR321

Hi ladies! I would like to add that I still lurk from time to time, but I think my posts/comments decreased once we added each other on FB! Since I am on FB every day, I interact with you through that! I will make a better effort to help boost up the energy around here!

jware1985

shawnana:

Okay, so I wasn't involved in the previous TTC tiff.  But, I do find it interesting how everytime NesJas posts something it seems as though (and this is my perception) you are the first to take it offensively and say something that could be interpreted as snarky back to her.  Which, I think it's kind of funny, considering you were standing up for Stacy, and yet I don't see Stacy doing that.  Again, this is my perception.  I won't speak for others. 

As for the Cheesecake gtg, I know that I didn't make an effort to go to the other table and say hello.  I fault myself in that.  It wasn't because I didn't like the girls at the other table, I didn't know most of them (except for a few).  I tend to be somewhat shy in some social settings, and I chose to stick to my comfort zone. And as for people not making efforts to go to the other table, that goes both ways.  Whatevs, it would be hypocritical of me to lay blame on others when I didn't make an effort.   

I also agree with the previous comments on the immediate YGPM messages... I believe that definitely adds to the clique feeling.  I understand the occasional need for a PM.  But in response to a public post?  Really? 

There will always be disagreements.  There will always be people you don't like or whatever.  I guess it's in how you move on from it.

Ok, so I don't think I attach Vanessa all the time but that is your opinion, and just because someone doesn't say anything on the board doesn't mean they don't talk about it off the board... that goes for everyone I think.

I have moved on from everything my point in posting this was to lay it all out there so we ALL can move on...

I think you are right about the GTG I didn?t venture over to much seeing how the day before hadn't gone so well on FB and I got a few odd looks, that?s cool, it was a huge gtg and it was difficult to get to talk to everyone.

I am not trying to make drama here all though that may be how it is perceived I am trying to see if we al can get on the same page and move on and celebrate all the joyous things we all have going on in our lives.

I came on this board to make friends; I have made a few but welcome the opportunity to make more.

 

berbur

shawnana:

I also lurk, but post very little these days.  For a couple reasons.  First and foremost, being I have little time to post at work these days.  However, the few times that I have posted something, it gets very little response, so what's the point? 

Which, I tend to think that is due to a lot of "clickiness" that has formed on the board.  I think it all kind of came to a head after the Cheesecake Factory gtg.  There was a huge division of people at the tables, and it's carried on through to the board. 

It is what it is.  Different personalities, people, whatever.  The board has changed a lot over the year and a half I've posted on it, and it's just not the same.  I honestly don't know what can be done to make it feel less "clickish". 

Just my honest 2 cents. 

Agreed! I, however, didn't go to the GTG...

Syndelin

I try to post a bit... but sometimes feel weird because I know none of you know me really at all, and most of the posts lately are really pretty personal things happening.

I know it's a public forum and all, but still, most of you girls seem to have been here awhile and know each other at least fairly well.  So sometimes I feel a bit as though I'm trying to stick my nose into an already formed group.  Honestly, I can be a bit socially awkward and shy anyway until people really get to know me (which takes awhile). 

I don't know about any past groups or drama, nor do I really want to get into any of it.  It's not my type of thing...  and I can get along with anyone and everyone that takes any time to see who I really am.