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Similar to post below:
Okay, so I am pretty much in the exact same situation as the poster below me.
Ignoring the fact that when I posted here about my similar situation, everyone told me to suck it up, have my H have a relationship with them and either suck it up or just stay at home with MH goes to see them, I am in a similar situation as the poster below.
(which I give the **side eye** by the way, that you all judge pretty much the same situations so differently but anyways)
So, we're married. Neither one of us wants to see them. However, he has mentioned that if we got a divorce, he would pretty much be alone. His mom is awesome but she has some mental/physical issues (also has fibromyalgia, like me, you know the disease that doesn't exist?) and he feels he couldn't count on her for emotional/mental/child support and help. I feel he would go back to his dad's family out of desperation.
Fine. Whatever. But just like the poster below, I don't think I would want my child in that situation. Is there anything I can do to prevent that from happening? We are starting fostering when I get out of graduate school and will eventally adopt through the foster care system.
Re: Similar to post below:
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
ECB - you're right, I'm sorry.
And, yes, not everyone said but when fibromyalgia has taken jobs, schools, relationships away from you and you're in agony and then people say it's fake, you don't feel so good.
Basically, FIL tried to control wedding, shut us out when we tried to explain we wanted a small wedding, always drinking, never talking with us, always talked AT mh, never talked to me, always went around to talk to h, sent us extremely harsh emails, texts, phone calls. Everything has ended now, there is no contact.
But, if we divorced, H wanted kids to see FIL, is there anything I can do to stop the kids from being in that environment?
I don't understand why you're even asking for advice when you clearly don't like what people on here have to say.
And why do you talk about what would happen if you got a divorce? That's just borrowing trouble.
Maybe.............
but, then again he screws women on the side............
so you never know.
I think it was probably under another sn. But it was years ago.
And, a lot of stuff - the main stuff - has happened since then.
The previous post - FIL tried to take the wedding over.
Now - all the other stuff.
Maybe if you just admit to yourself that you married your gay BFF and that your marriage has an expiration date, you'll be happier.
Why would you have children with someone if you think you need to prepare for a divorce beforehand?
Of course I don't think we will get divorced (but as much as I am an optimist, I am definitely a realist) and the divorce rate is 50% plus we got married young, plus all our parents got divorced, I have medical problems, and we will be paying student loans off forever - so the stressors, the stats - according to experts, we are a ticking time bomb.
So, I want to live my future with MH but I also want to protect all of us from any fall out if we do get a divorce.
Um, don't forget about all the fcking of other people you do on the side.
With that said, do you 2 just sit around talking about divorce? Because you sure bring it up a lot.
I think the other sex partners has already been mentioned in this post..................
he probably hates you because you lied to him and told him you got married without him and then went ahead and had the wedding on the original date and then let them find out later through your wedding announcement in the paper that you had lied to them.
also i totally dont believe you that you arent contemplating divorce since your recent posts have been regarding changing your name BACK to your maiden name (since you dont want to be associated with you FIL and you caved to societal pressures and now regret it)
AND
you want your husband to sign a post-nup that he will give you alimony and pay for your health care and wages (from under the table jobs).
I still do not understand why you would be taking out student loans when you have said several times that you won't be able to work more than part time ever.
Because:
part time work = job after graduation
job after graduation = requires degree
degree = requires student loans
therefore:
job after graduation = student loans
i already said he hates me
that's not the problem
my name change not problem
husband agreed to give me alimony and health care - said it was fair - not problem
problem: in case of divorce...............no answer yet
and stees since ur not having kids please back out gracefully of conversation
In all seriousness... Perhaps you shouldn't be planning your children around when you finish school. Maybe you should wait until you aren't so concerned with whether or not your marriage will survive.
youre not having children either. that would be too selfish of you to do.
What's with the text speak, SW2B? I thought you were a highly educated person who graduated from a prestigious college. Surely you can take the time to use proper spelling and grammar.
You're not listening.
I am not concerned personally.
However, logically, realistically, professionally, I know EVERYONE could potentially divorce.
And, pardon me for wanting to be prepared for it.
i am going ro raise children
sorry my arthritis is bothering you
My favoritest kind.
updated 10.03.12
now youve developed arthritis in the last 24 hours in addition to the FM? or was it really just arthritis this whole time?
Best. Rationalization. Ever.
updated 10.03.12