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NBR: Normal Wedding Gift Cost?

A girl on my BMB just said that they always spend or give $300 for a wedding gift and that is the expected, normal amount in her area or group of friends. My jaw probably hit the ground. I would say more like $50-$100, depending on how close we are to them. 

She explained that they want to give enough to cover their dinner, which is usually about $100/person and then a little more as the "gift"..... Huh? I mean... is that normal? 

Am I super cheap or is this insane? 
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Re: NBR: Normal Wedding Gift Cost?

  • SnShne322SnShne322 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited March 2014
    I usually spend about 100-200 depending on how close I am with the person.  300 is definitely on the high side for me!

    ETA: I do agree that it might cost 100/pp for the meal, but I feel like the paying for your dinner idea is antiquated.  You're there as a guest, not a paid attendee. At least, that's my thinking.
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  • We generally give $100 as well and that is what most people gave us as gifts too.
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  • We usually do about $100 total.  

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  • SnShne322 said:
    I usually spend about 100-200 depending on how close I am with the person.  300 is definitely on the high side for me!

    ETA: I do agree that it might cost 100/pp for the meal, but I feel like the paying for your dinner idea is antiquated.  You're there as a guest, not a paid attendee. At least, that's my thinking.
     
    Oh yeah, that's what I was saying- I think that $100 for dinner is in the ballpark of normal, but not feeling like you have to pay for your meal... I didn't expect that at my wedding and don't feel like that is the point of a wedding gift, it is just that- a gift. 
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  • Depends on the person getting married.  I tend to spend between $200-$400 total. 
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  • $100 for not that close, $200 for close friends or family. 

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  • When we were younger it was generally $50 because that was what we could afford. Now we do $100ish for people we're not super close to and closer to $200 for really close people.
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  • It depends on the person, 50-75 if I don't know you that or 100 or more depending on how well I know you and like you.  
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  • I don't even think there is a "normal". We usually give about $150 but for our wedding, we got from $50 to $500. It used be to be "give enough to cover your plate" but around here, we would be giving over $200 (for 2 of us)most times.
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  • I usually spend around $100 to $150 depending on who it is. I think it depends on the group that you are gifting with as well, I know my parents/aunts and uncles agreed on gift amounts for weddings so they would all give the same amount to each of the nieces/nephews and my cousins and I would all give the same to each other at each wedding.
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  • It depends on the person for me but we usually give about $150-200 for friends or cousins and about $300-350 for very close friends or family (siblings). We'll usually give a little less if we have to travel for the wedding.
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  • It depends, but generally $200, probably more for close friends or family.
  • Holy crap, that's a lot of money for wedding gifts! I guess it's just not common in my area to give that much. The "normal" amount here is usually $50 or even less. 
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  • I give $100 and that's pretty standard around here. 
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  • I'm a total cheapskate, especially since we only have one income right now, so our usual is in the $30-50 range.
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  • The MINIMUM I would give is $100 but that is not for anyone I am super close to. I usually give $200- $250.


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  • HoycieHoycie member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2014
    I would rather not go to the wedding than be cheap with the gift.  We normally give $100+

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  • My Mother in Law gave us a check for $25 for our wedding gift.  I wanted to give it back to her and tell her to use it for toilet paper the next time she headed to the restroom.  

    My inlaws didn't even get us a card. Guess they were really out of luck next time they used the restroom.
    Books read in 2009: 112
    Books read in 2010: 153
    Books read in 2011: 160
    Books read in 2012: 134
    Books read in 2013: 110
    Books read in 2014: 151
    Books read in 2015: 153
    Books read in 2016: 31

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  • packfan20 said:
    My Mother in Law gave us a check for $25 for our wedding gift.  I wanted to give it back to her and tell her to use it for toilet paper the next time she headed to the restroom.  
    My inlaws didn't even get us a card. Guess they were really out of luck next time they used the restroom.
    I would have preferred nothing.  A $25 check might as well have been a slap in the face.  

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  • packfan20 said:

    My Mother in Law gave us a check for $25 for our wedding gift.  I wanted to give it back to her and tell her to use it for toilet paper the next time she headed to the restroom.  

    My inlaws didn't even get us a card. Guess they were really out of luck next time they used the restroom.

    I would have preferred nothing.  A $25 check might as well have been a slap in the face.  



    Agreed.

    Books read in 2009: 112
    Books read in 2010: 153
    Books read in 2011: 160
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    Books read in 2013: 110
    Books read in 2014: 151
    Books read in 2015: 153
    Books read in 2016: 31

    Leah (packfan20)'s book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
             
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    Lilypie - (Bh7p)

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  • Hoycie said:

    I would rather not go to the wedding than be cheap with the gift.  We normally give $100+

    As a bride I would've much rather had someone I invited come to my wedding sans gift if they couldn't afford it than not come. I wanted them there for our day, not for the purpose of them bringing me a big gift.

    Maybe here in MO it's different COL and all that.

    Sammie born 04/23/09 (Peanut allergy)
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    2015 Books Read 3 * 2014 Books Read: 151
    2013 Books Read: 90 * 2012 Books Read: 125
    2011 Books Read: 150  * 2010 Books Read: 117

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  • We usually give in the $30 - $50 range, more for very close friends. But that's normal in our circle. I didn't keep track of who gave what at mine beyond thank yous and my friends are equally laid back.
    imageimage image
  • I normally give around the $50-$100 range, I spend more for close friends and family though.  I don't go to many weddings where people are spending anywhere near $100/plate, if that makes any difference. 


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  • EliStarEliStar member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2014
    Jen748 said:
    I would rather not go to the wedding than be cheap with the gift.  We normally give $100+
    As a bride I would've much rather had someone I invited come to my wedding sans gift if they couldn't afford it than not come. I wanted them there for our day, not for the purpose of them bringing me a big gift. Maybe here in MO it's different COL and all that.
    COL is much higher here in Miami, so I'm sure that has something to do with it. Weddings are easily $125 a plate here.  We paid about $100 pp just for food and drink back when we got married and prices have skyrocketed. 

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  • We went to a wedding (which my husband officiated as the JP) and it was the groom's 8th time down the aisle and we still gave them a gift of $200.  
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  • We went to a wedding (which my husband officiated as the JP) and it was the groom's 8th time down the aisle and we still gave them a gift of $200.  
    Who has time for that?! 1 wedding was more than enough for multiple lifetimes for me!

    Also, I think there is a difference in wanting your friends to be there regardless of gift and being the guest who doesn't feel like they should go if they can't give the gift they want to be able to give. They're two different things IMO. I don't think either is wrong.
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  • EliStar said:
    Jen748 said:
    I would rather not go to the wedding than be cheap with the gift.  We normally give $100+
    As a bride I would've much rather had someone I invited come to my wedding sans gift if they couldn't afford it than not come. I wanted them there for our day, not for the purpose of them bringing me a big gift. Maybe here in MO it's different COL and all that.
    COL is much higher here in Miami, so I'm sure that has something to do with it. Weddings are easily $125 a plate here.  We paid about $100 pp just for food and drink back when we got married and prices have skyrocketed. 
    Exactly.  

    If I were tight on funds, I would much rather they save themselves the money for A and me if I wouldn't be able to give them something nice in return.  Miami is not cheap at all. 

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  • I'd say our norm is about $50 for a shower gift off the registry and about $150 cash for the wedding.  Everyone in our group got married within a couple of years, so I haven't been to a wedding in a while, other than my husband's cousin who 'eloped' and he took care of all of that.
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  • We are in the $50-$100 range although so far we've always either been in school or were both working not great paying jobs....I  love being generous so if we ever got to a point that we could afford to give more that'd be awesome :)


    Normally being a musician however I end up pulling double duty in which case I play (for free) and normally still get them about a $50 gift so then I don't feel as bad!
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