Money Matters
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: GTKY: Your life, your money.
I think his problems are:
1. He is not enough of a go getter. This probably shows up in interviews.
2. He worked at one place in one field before losing his job in his early 40's. He started at a worker bee level and then became manager of the group. He is only qualified for only the one type of work and nothing else. Let's call this type A work.
3. There are a decent number of worker bee jobs that start in the $40s. Some companies will have a manager and they can make $60-80K. He started interviewing for the manager jobs when he lost his job. There are only so many companies that have managers and only so many companies that have job openings. He has gotten interviews when these come up but no offers. Sometimes the manager needs to do Type A work + Type B or Type C work. H only knows A work and isn't qualified for these more expanded jobs.
4. After a certain amount of time of not getting a manager job he expanded his search to worker bee jobs at half the salary. It is very hard to get this kind of job when you are in your 40's and overqualified for it. Someone out of college will be seen as qualified, cheap and the better way to go.
His severance lasted over a year. After that ran out I tore him a new one about getting a J-O-B. He really should have done this earlier but see #1, and I can only nag (and only want to nag) so much.
Once he started applying for temp jobs he found one quickly and then another one when that ran out. Those lasted through Dec but nothing happening in Dec so now he is interviewing for new temp jobs. He should be able to get something in the worker bee field for around $20/hr. Ideally something that lasts several months. And even more ideally something that has potential to turn to permanent. His first temp job was heading in that direction but the permanent job offer took a weird turn and didn't work out...probably for the best since that company was kind of wack but at this point it would have been at least something.
Now that he has his rear in gear I don't know that there is much more he can do. During my job search process I was turned down for a lot of jobs. I have seriously probably applied and/or interviewed with around a quarter of the major companies in my city. You only need 1 to make the offer but who knows when that will come? He was close to getting a dream job in his field. He actually interviewed well and was great for the job, but it came down to him and one other person and the other person (an internal candidate) got the job. That was really depressing.
He isn't actively searching for jobs in other cities but if a good one comes his way via a recruiter or something he looks into it. None of these have gotten very far but they are worth investigating. We really don't want to move and since I am the higher income he would have to get a $$$ job for us to consider it, but we definitely consider it on a job by job basis....but once again no offers so not much to consider.
I think his problems are:
1. He is not enough of a go getter. This probably shows up in interviews.
2. He worked at one place in one field before losing his job in his early 40's. He started at a worker bee level and then became manager of the group. He is only qualified for only the one type of work and nothing else. Let's call this type A work.
3. There are a decent number of worker bee jobs that start in the $40s. Some companies will have a manager and they can make $60-80K. He started interviewing for the manager jobs when he lost his job. There are only so many companies that have managers and only so many companies that have job openings. He has gotten interviews when these come up but no offers. Sometimes the manager needs to do Type A work + Type B or Type C work. H only knows A work and isn't qualified for these more expanded jobs.
4. After a certain amount of time of not getting a manager job he expanded his search to worker bee jobs at half the salary. It is very hard to get this kind of job when you are in your 40's and overqualified for it. Someone out of college will be seen as qualified, cheap and the better way to go.
His severance lasted over a year. After that ran out I tore him a new one about getting a J-O-B. He really should have done this earlier but see #1, and I can only nag (and only want to nag) so much.
Once he started applying for temp jobs he found one quickly and then another one when that ran out. Those lasted through Dec but nothing happening in Dec so now he is interviewing for new temp jobs. He should be able to get something in the worker bee field for around $20/hr. Ideally something that lasts several months. And even more ideally something that has potential to turn to permanent. His first temp job was heading in that direction but the permanent job offer took a weird turn and didn't work out...probably for the best since that company was kind of wack but at this point it would have been at least something.
Now that he has his rear in gear I don't know that there is much more he can do. During my job search process I was turned down for a lot of jobs. I have seriously probably applied and/or interviewed with around a quarter of the major companies in my city. You only need 1 to make the offer but who knows when that will come? He was close to getting a dream job in his field. He actually interviewed well and was great for the job, but it came down to him and one other person and the other person (an internal candidate) got the job. That was really depressing.
He isn't actively searching for jobs in other cities but if a good one comes his way via a recruiter or something he looks into it. None of these have gotten very far but they are worth investigating. We really don't want to move and since I am the higher income he would have to get a $$$ job for us to consider it, but we definitely consider it on a job by job basis....but once again no offers so not much to consider.
What a hard situation. Hope he lands something soon!
Hi All. Maybe this is a good time to say hello & officially introduce myself. I’ve lurked for a long time & signed up with a username last week. I love reading about what other ladies (I think its mostly ladies?) are up to.
LIFE
Life is good & I can’t complain. Except I just turned 40, I try to look at it as a blessing…. but 40, yikes.
JOB
Just celebrated 10 years w/ my company. It’s a good place to work, walking distance to our house, great people & very flexible. I’m happy & don’t see myself leaving any time soon.
FAMILY
I live in Boston with my SO of 5+ years & “our” dog (I had the dog before the guy). She’s 11, the sweetest mutt ever. We are not married, after a sticky divorce, he’s in no hurry. We're older & don't want kids, it works for us. We bought a house in the city a few years ago & love it. I’m also really tight with my mom, sister & nieces – they’re all local.
MONEY
I found this site & was amazed at how disciplined some of you are with money, I need discipline. I don’t have a budget, but we both earn decent salaries*, we don’t have kids, & we have "disposable" income. We dispose most of it on trips, eating out & I buy too many clothes.
I'd say we are in decent financial shape w/out trying very hard. I put 15% into my 401k. My e-fund is $15k + $30k in investments. I’m also a landlady & earn $500/monthly (after fees/taxes) & put that money into a separate account for the apartment (about $7k). Other then the mortgages & my car – we do not have any debt.
*after writing this, I should mention, BF is out of work. He lost his job in November. He's smart, motivated, and there is a lot of demand for his type of work. he got a generous severance + bonus + he's collecting unemployment. we haven't had to adjust our spending yet (although we eat in more & haven't booked the vacation we hoped to take this winter). I'm optimistic about the situation.
@csuave, I just wanted to shout out my sympathies and let you know you aren't the only one. I've mentioned it here and there, but my H has been out of work for 2 1/2 years also. It's ridiculous it's been that long but, there ya go.
He is super extremely qualified with just about anything computer related. Has worked since the mid 80s in computers and done everything from programming to database management to managing entire companies information systems and networks. Yet he can't find work.
Part of it is, there are slim pickings for those kind of jobs in NOLA. But (I think) a bigger part is he gets frustrated and gives up looking for long periods of time. He doesn't motivate himself very well, but then I don't want to be a nag and make him feel worse about himself.
He's had a number of interviews over this time, but none of them have stuck. That does make me concerned that maybe he doesn't interview well. I also worry that his age (early 50s) and long gap since his last job are huge detriments. Of course, age discrimination is against the law...but let's be real. It happens all the time.
About one year ago, it was EXTRA frustrating!!! He was given a job offer as a contractor at a Naval base. Because of the sensitive nature of the work, it takes 1-2 weeks of background checks before he could really start working. He started the process so, technically started the job. But then, the person he was going to be replacing changed their mind and stayed. I cannot even tell you how crushing that was for both of us, but especially for him.
With all that said, over the last few months, he has been working his tail off doing construction at the duplex we bought that needed to be rehabbed. I also have a flexible p/t job that I'm allowed to "sub-contract" out so to speak, and he has taken over the majority of that for me.
Yes, the age "discrimination" is real. I've worked with guys that lost their jobs in their 50's and then did temp work until they could get to their chosen retirement age. A strategy that works much better when planning for retirement, building up HSA accounts, etc. are done earlier in life....something that is the back of my mind as I try to plan for a healthy financial security in my 50's.
3. Your family
4. Your money
Great! After our home re-finance, we have changed up our debt repayment strategy. It freed up $300 a month to go toward debt and we get to "skip" our mortgage payments for 2 months, so we threw half at debt and half in savings. I still need to spend time understanding specific investment options and re-think our retirement savings options.
2. Your job - I think I stated it mostly above. My job is ridiculously demanding. On the plus side, I received an excellent performance review and maxed out my bonus percentage based on my role level. I received the bonus today and it's soooo sad looking after taxes and 401k but seeing that extra money is still nice.
3. Your family - H and I are DINKs, so we're the only family to speak of other than our dog, Cinders. No kids on the horizon for now, we're just living the life.
4. Your money - We made the decision this year to start maxing out our 401ks while we can. It's been somewhat of a struggle to make an adjustment. We have a monthly budget that we track in YNAB but H is still complaining about the credit card bill and various regular charges. I think we need to revisit our old budget that we made prior to the 401k percentage change and see where we can make reductions. Going to back to what I said earlier about our spending habits - I work really hard to stick to the budget so it's a huge downer when H starts to stress and complain over expenses even when we're both sticking to the budget. Hopefully revisiting the budget and making some adjustments will help us both to feel happier (me because I don't feel like I'm being griped at and him for seeing a smaller monthly credit card bill).