TTC ladies (and gents) & Pregnant MMers

brij2006 · December 2016

I know we have quite a few of us on here who are currently TTC or close to it, as well as some who are pregnant.
How's everyone doing?

brij2006 · December 2016

I'm currently 14 weeks pregnant. Still taking 4 doses a day of anti-nausea meds, but am actually feeling rather good for the most part. Much better than with DD's pregnancy. At this point with hers I had gained 10 pounds already, was constantly exhausted, and could only keep down Cheerios and pasta. Granted I think the fact that I caved and got on meds early on this time, helped.
We're still planning to be team green again.

Xstatic3333 · December 2016

Congrats on second tri @brij2006! Glad you are feeling well and that the meds are doing what they're supposed to.

I am 31 weeks now and doing very well. I have the normal aches and pains, and pregnancy has been mentally tough in some ways I didn't anticipate, but really everything is going great. It's a boy, and we pretty much have all the stuff we need, though it is not yet all washed, prepped, and set up. No name yet, and we probably won't finalize a name until we meet him. We've decided to cloth diaper, which has been a ton of fun to research, but I've also realized it could be a very slippery slope into saving no money at all if I'm not pretty strict with myself about my purchases.

LillibetteV · December 2016

I love this! I'm 8 weeks now and have good and bad days still. Mostly exhaustion, cramping, and some nausea but thankfully no real morning sickness. Getting dressed is increasingly difficult because the boobs won't stop growing! I have 14 more progesterone in oil shots and then I'm DONE with fertility treatments - it will be an even 100 shots by then and I have to say my husband is a rockstar for administering all of them. I'm an overplanner and I already want to figure out if I can have an extended maternity leave, but I'm not actually ready to tell my boss yet. Standard is 3 months (w/ 2 paid), but I'd like to take 6 months if possible.

ETA: we're totally Team Green too. Or at least I am and my husband is letting me have it since he knows I'm a control freak and I had ZERO control over getting pregnant lol.

als1982 · December 2016

We've been TTC for two years now. As I get closer to 35, we'll probably stop trying completely and look to adoption, likely older child/ren.

smetter04 · December 2016

We plan to start TTC at the end of December (which I just realized is three weeks away, wow). I'm trying to remember to take prenatals every morning, but I tend to forget in the busy morning so I think I need to start taking it with dinner.

The big question right now is medical benefits, because open enrollment is next week. H and I currently hold our own coverage because it's cheaper on the single tier vs. employee + spouse. I'm leaning towards SAH, so if we do get pregnant in the first couple months of trying, it may be an issue if I have to switch to dependent status mid-year, if the deductible resets (I know it's not likely that we get pregnant right away, however it's a possibility and we need to be prepared for whatever could happen). I'm waiting on a response from our benefits advisor. It's safer to just go onto H's coverage as a dependent now, but that's more expensive, and what if our potential due date ends up being in 2018, then the extra cost of medical in 2017 would be a waste.

Somebody please knock some sense into me if I'm way overthinking this.

hoffse · December 2016

Still in the TTC process - we haven't been trying for very long yet, but I'm such a planner that it's already bugging me that things aren't happening exactly on my desired schedule.

We haven't gotten too scientific with it - just lots of sexy time. My H admitted to me the other day that he wouldn't mind if it took a bit longer lol.

If nothing happens on the next cycle then I will start the OPK's, charting/temping, etc.

If nothing happens by May then I am going to book a trip to Japan over Thanksgiving 2017 on points. I'm really close to having enough for 2 RT flights in biz to Asia.

Anyway I'm trying to live life and not worry about it.

LillibetteV · December 2016

hoffse said:

Still in the TTC process - we haven't been trying for very long yet, but I'm such a planner that it's already bugging me that things aren't happening exactly on my desired schedule.

We haven't gotten too scientific with it - just lots of sexy time. My H admitted to me the other day that he wouldn't mind if it took a bit longer lol.

If nothing happens on the next cycle then I will start the OPK's, charting/temping, etc.

If nothing happens by May then I am going to book a trip to Japan over Thanksgiving 2017 on points. I'm really close to having enough for 2 RT flights in biz to Asia.

Anyway I'm trying to live life and not worry about it.

I was the exact same way! I'm pretty sure that it took us 2 years to conceive because the universe was trying to teach me some lesson about patience and not being overly controlling. That and DH and I both had malfunctioning parts - hooray for science!

julieanne912 · December 2016

We're probably going to start it up after the new year. I'm not getting any younger (I'll be 35 in May), and my mom is moving out here next summer, and she has volunteered to watch hypothetical baby after I go back to work, at least at first. We just want one, so might as well get on with it LOL

But, I've also, at least for now, been OK with the idea of not having one, so if it doesn't work out, we'll just be childless. My periods have started to act up, not as reliable as they used to be, more time in between each one, so I'm wondering if we just waited too long. I'm not really wanting to do a whole lot of medical intervention to have a kid either.

I also need to find a new doctor now that I'm on new insurance and work in a different location. I think I've narrowed down to the hospital I'd like to deliver at, so I'm hoping to find a doctor near there, since it's also right between home and work.

splotch716 · December 2016

DH and I are technically NTNP but really want to TFAS. My cycles are long because I am still night breast feeding our daughter, who will be 2 on the 22nd. Our problem is actually finding time for sexy time. We are both so exhausted and work early. Sometimes I fall asleep with DD when I put her to bed. We spent the last few years concentrating on financial health but ignored a lot of our physical health. We have agreed to shift our focus to physical health for 2017. Hoping for a BFP in 2017!

labro · December 2016

Vibes for everyone TTC and who are currently pregnant!

We aren't currently, though there have been a couple of discussions, but it's not something we're ready to start right now, maybe it will be a real possibility sometime later in 2017. This thread, and my sister NTNP but soon TFAS, are seriously giving me some raging baby fever though.

brij2006 · December 2016

LillibetteV said:

hoffse said:

Still in the TTC process - we haven't been trying for very long yet, but I'm such a planner that it's already bugging me that things aren't happening exactly on my desired schedule.

We haven't gotten too scientific with it - just lots of sexy time. My H admitted to me the other day that he wouldn't mind if it took a bit longer lol.

If nothing happens on the next cycle then I will start the OPK's, charting/temping, etc.

If nothing happens by May then I am going to book a trip to Japan over Thanksgiving 2017 on points. I'm really close to having enough for 2 RT flights in biz to Asia.

Anyway I'm trying to live life and not worry about it.

I was the exact same way! I'm pretty sure that it took us 2 years to conceive because the universe was trying to teach me some lesson about patience and not being overly controlling. That and DH and I both had malfunctioning parts - hooray for science!

I say this same exact thing. I'm very type A, so it taking us so long to get pregnant both times was frustrating. I think this time was actually worse because we knew we could get pregnant yet it wasn't happening.
I swear 3T has forced me to have patience and not try to be in control of everything. We're discussing possibly having more than 2 children and I'm already dreading the thought of having no clue how far apart they will be. It most definitely wasn't in our "plan" for this one and DD to be as far apart as they will be, but oh well.

LillibetteV · December 2016

brij2006 said:

LillibetteV said:

hoffse said:

Still in the TTC process - we haven't been trying for very long yet, but I'm such a planner that it's already bugging me that things aren't happening exactly on my desired schedule.

We haven't gotten too scientific with it - just lots of sexy time. My H admitted to me the other day that he wouldn't mind if it took a bit longer lol.

If nothing happens on the next cycle then I will start the OPK's, charting/temping, etc.

If nothing happens by May then I am going to book a trip to Japan over Thanksgiving 2017 on points. I'm really close to having enough for 2 RT flights in biz to Asia.

Anyway I'm trying to live life and not worry about it.

I was the exact same way! I'm pretty sure that it took us 2 years to conceive because the universe was trying to teach me some lesson about patience and not being overly controlling. That and DH and I both had malfunctioning parts - hooray for science!

I say this same exact thing. I'm very type A, so it taking us so long to get pregnant both times was frustrating. I think this time was actually worse because we knew we could get pregnant yet it wasn't happening.
I swear 3T has forced me to have patience and not try to be in control of everything. We're discussing possibly having more than 2 children and I'm already dreading the thought of having no clue how far apart they will be. It most definitely wasn't in our "plan" for this one and DD to be as far apart as they will be, but oh well.

That is one of the few silver linings of IVF - we won't have to do this again. We have 3 siblings in the freezer so when we're ready we can thaw one out and pop it in. We theoretically should have more control over our spacing AND we don't have to worry about some of the genetic concerns with getting older because we'll always be using young eggs and sperm! Our current plan is to try for a kid every 18 months after having the previous one and cap out at 3 or 4. We'll see how tired and enthusiastic we are after the first 2 though hahaha.

hoffse · December 2016

Yeah we have started young enough that I have time to be patient - I just turned 30 in October - but all of my friends are on baby #2, so it feels a bit late in that sense. I am not a patient person and never have been. My H is the zen one.

That being said, we are open to both fertility treatments and adoption if conceiving naturally does not work out. We have talked about trying to adopt regardless.

bmo88 · December 2016

I posted in the TTC/3T section, but this was our first official month trying. I was temping and using OPKs and we hit my FW and day before O perfectly.

I tested yesterday morning because AF was due on Sunday. I got 3 positive results. But AF showed up about mid-day and has not stopped. I am going in for tests later today. I am afraid I am having a chemical pregnancy.

I am heartbroken because I don't think this will end well.

brij2006 · December 2016

Oh @bmo88 So many hugs. I've had multiple chemical pregnancies and one miscarriage, they are all very heartbreaking. Hopefully the tests today will give you some answers.
*But do know that if AF is here it's likely your HCG draw will come back at 0 (not pregnant). I know for me every single time I had a CP and they'd check my HCG it would be back down to under 5 by that point.

smetter04 · December 2016

@bmo88 hugs!

brij2006 · December 2016

hoffse said:

Yeah we have started young enough that I have time to be patient - I just turned 30 in October - but all of my friends are on baby #2, so it feels a bit late in that sense. I am not a patient person and never have been. My H is the zen one.

That being said, we are open to both fertility treatments and adoption if conceiving naturally does not work out. We have talked about trying to adopt regardless.

It's a bit hard for us because with all of our friends we're the "old parents." Whenever we try to make friends with parents DD's age, they're easily 5 years younger than us, but in our area if you aren't a parent by 30 then you're in the old parent group. I'll be 29 and H will be 31 when this one is born. Most of our friends have school age children.

It's also a really good thing both you and your H have discussed treatment and adoption and are both on the same page with it. We did not when we started TTC and I immediately had 90+ day cycles and needed to get checked out and tests run to see what was going on. We were told 4 months into TTC that our only chance was to start with treatment. Neither one of us were ready nor had we even discussed it. In the meantime we continued trying but knowing we had zero chance with my lack of cycles. It was very hard on our marriage.
I will say that this past time we discussed everything before TTC#2. When we'd start trying, at what point we'd seek assistance if I wasn't getting cycles, what I'd try as far as diet or medication to try and get cycles naturally before we sought assistance, etc. It was still pretty stressful for us, but at least this time around there were no questions as to where we each stood and how important expanding our family was for us.
It's funny but we've even discussed TTC#3 already. It's still up in the air, but we've talked about whether or not we'd get assistance and what we'll do for protection after #2 is here. Far different from our lack of discussion the first time TTC.

Xstatic3333 · December 2016

I'm so sorry @bmo88. What a tough way to start TTC.

labro · December 2016

@bmo88 Big hugs!

bmo88 · December 2016

@smetter04 @labro @brij2006 @Xstatic3333 : Thanks ladies. I have been a mess today and probably shouldn't have come into work.

I just finished meeting with a co-worker who is pregnant. She asked why I looked so tired and I said I didn't sleep well. She responded with, "just wait until you get pregnant, by the end, you will need lots of pillows to help you sleep."

I just looked at her and said nothing. As soon as she left I started bawling.

vlagrl35 · December 2016

OMG I cried last thursday when spotting started and I cried today when I saw blood come out. I feel like giving up. We have tried 6 cycle now. As some of you know it only took one cycle with DD 6 years ago so I think that may be why I'm freaking out more than I should be. DH has been really supportive thru it all. I've been a hot mess so much and I've been trying to figure out how to get off the emotional roller coaster so I've been keeping so busy with so much else right now its not even funny.

Good news is I bought blood work from my chiro which is way cheaper than thru insurance - $193. The results will get faxed to my OB. I get by blood draw this week and end of month. SA for DH will cost $90 and he will get that done this month. I was figuring insurance wouldn't pay for HSG test but they are shockingly. Just found that out today. I will also get that done this month. I will only owe 10% of whatever amount they charge blue cross. I'm kinda nervous for that test. I'm hoping we can find some answers as to why it's not happening. Everything may come out all normal who knows but at least we have a plan and that makes me feel better because I've been having all sorts of negative thought lately as to why it's not happening and that just makes me sad. Like I didn't even know there was such a thing as secondary intertility - who knew? Well I can't let that thought stay in my brain.

Needless to say I've also been drowning myself in yoga to cope.

vlagrl35 · December 2016

I want to add to all you control freaks as I am too - those opks and charting and temping can be really tempting and make you feel better but in my case it made me go crazy and sex became such a forced chore for me that it didn't feel good. Gave all that stuff up last month and sex was so much better and I didn't have to use any lube at all. It was fun. I was obsessing over timed intercourse and temp rises and falls- it made me crazy.

I'm 36 and will be 37 in may - DH will be 41 but I don't feel like we are old but I did in the beginning like maybe we waited too long to try for the 2nd. Then I remembered that people in their 40s get pregnant all the time - it has to still be possible right?

I got frustrated and stopped taking my prenatals this month. The thought crossed my mind to sell DDs small clothes in the basement but I knew if I did I would start balling so I can't do it yet.

vlagrl35 · December 2016

@bmo88 I'm so sorry! that's heartbreaking.

Xstatic3333 · December 2016

@vlagrl35 I hope you get some good answers from the testing and a path forward to pursue. That's great that your insurance will cover the HSG!

@als1982 I'm sorry you are still waiting as well. Best wishes with your decisions about adoption and any other potential next strps.

als1982 · December 2016

Xstatic3333 said:

@vlagrl35 I hope you get some good answers from the testing and a path forward to pursue. That's great that your insurance will cover the HSG!

@als1982 I'm sorry you are still waiting as well. Best wishes with your decisions about adoption and any other potential next strps.

Thank you. I appreciate the support. It's been a really, really tough go, especially in year two. The hardest part of infertility has definitely been the feeling of isolation, and the barrage of pregnancy announcements at work, on social media, within my friend groups, etc.

als1982 · December 2016

vlagrl35 said:

OMG I cried last thursday when spotting started and I cried today when I saw blood come out. I feel like giving up. We have tried 6 cycle now. As some of you know it only took one cycle with DD 6 years ago so I think that may be why I'm freaking out more than I should be. DH has been really supportive thru it all. I've been a hot mess so much and I've been trying to figure out how to get off the emotional roller coaster so I've been keeping so busy with so much else right now its not even funny.

Good news is I bought blood work from my chiro which is way cheaper than thru insurance - $193. The results will get faxed to my OB. I get by blood draw this week and end of month. SA for DH will cost $90 and he will get that done this month. I was figuring insurance wouldn't pay for HSG test but they are shockingly. Just found that out today. I will also get that done this month. I will only owe 10% of whatever amount they charge blue cross. I'm kinda nervous for that test. I'm hoping we can find some answers as to why it's not happening. Everything may come out all normal who knows but at least we have a plan and that makes me feel better because I've been having all sorts of negative thought lately as to why it's not happening and that just makes me sad. Like I didn't even know there was such a thing as secondary intertility - who knew? Well I can't let that thought stay in my brain.

Needless to say I've also been drowning myself in yoga to cope.

Don't stress about the HSG. It's super quick - the test itself maybe 5 minutes or so. But don't expect it to give you all the answers. It will just tell you a little about the state of your uterus and whether your tubes are blocked. If they are blocked it can but won't always unblock them. (It didn't budge mine.)

smerka · December 2016

I'm officially in the old mom category. I was 36 and 37 when my kids were born. Almost all of my mom friends are at least 5, if not 10, years younger. When they were in high school, I was out of college and working. It can be weird but not terrible.

It took 12 months with my first and I swear three things happened. I started working out, touched a friend's pregnant belly, and stopped thinking about it. I blame #2 or #3. Our second was an oops when #1 was 3 months old. I do and don't recommend that age gap.

Creepy internet hugs to all who are trying and Congrats to those already preggo!

takmjs · December 2016

We are on cycle/month 7 of TTC. It took 10 months for our 1st, and 6 months for our 2nd, so I'm not completely surprised. What is surprising is that I've never had regular cycles since my period began 20+ years ago, and yet as soon as I had my birth control implant removed, I've been much more "normal" in terms of regular-length cycles, sore/swollen boobs (never had that before), cramps I can handle, etc. I thought I didn't ovulate regularly before, because my cycles were always irregular, but now that they are regular, I'm annoyed/frustrated that it's not happening sooner!

I'm pretty sure it will happen in the next few months, but I still go in streaks in terms of thinking, "should we be done at 2 kids?" or "yes, I want 3-4 kids." The chaos of kids and our schedule make me wonder about having more.

Congrats to all of you who are pregnant, and good luck to those of you TTC!! I hope it happens soon for all of us!

vlagrl35 · December 2016

DH told me today that I should think it's his fault not mine because he always hears me say " I just don't understand whats wrong with me" - I told him that wouldn't help me. He likes to fix situations and this is not one that he can make me feel better about.

I think the worst thought I've had on more than 1 occasion is that we were only meant to have 1 kid and I wish I had known so I could have appreciated it more when DD was a baby. I hated being pregnant and then when she was 3 I could see how I wanted another one day and was adamant about waiting 5 years in case I had the same horrible pregnancy and go figure this happens. Sometimes I think maybe we waited to long and now we are both too old.

Here I was hoping December wouldn't be too stressful and now I have all these appts in addition to all the holiday stuff.

vlagrl35 · December 2016

oh and I did all that work and research on VBACs and interviewed 3 OBs so it would all be a go cause I was sure I would have been pregnant quickly like last time. what waste - although I do like my current OB and her nurse is really nice.

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