Sex & Romance
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I'm hoping to learn from your experience.

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Re: I'm hoping to learn from your experience.

  • imageiluvmylab:

    imagePixieChinchilla:
    I actually do not get annual pap smears, because my doctors [including my gyno] have told me I didn't need to start getting them until I was sexually active. One of the reasons I was asking about how long it usually hurts for people is because I'm trying to decide how long we should be willing to wait until I pay the doctor a visit to make sure that everything is okay. I honestly think at this point that it's still normal pain, especially when you add in how many times we've done it in the past three days. We're hoping that slowing down and going at it less often will help with the soreness, we just weren't sure at what point it becomes abnormal for me to still be struggling with it, you know?

    Ok this is not correct though.  You should get one by age 21 or when you become sexually active, whichever comes first.  You really should make an appointment to have an annual exam.  Then you could kill two birds with one stone!

    Actually, most doctors will tell you that you should start getting paps after you start having periods.  I have two friends that would be dead right now had they waited until sex or age 21 to start seeing a doctor.  One of my friends discovered stage 2 cervical cancer at age 17.  The other found out she had breast cancer at age 19. 

    To the OP, you really should schedule an apt with a GYN. 

    It is normal after only having sex for three days for you to still be feeling some pain.  However, it sounds to me that you need to be using lube more often durring sex.  Don't just use it in the begining.  Some people have to reaply several times.  Also, if you feel that your H is too long for you, have him not go in all the way.  He may have to learn how to control his strokes.  There are also many positions that you can try that don't go so deep.  Hang in there, you'll figure it out.

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  • Wow...so many virgins until marriage, I'm so impressed :)  That's awesome!  So maybe the answer to this is obvious but...are you wearing condoms when you're having sex?  I mean, if you're not planning a family quite yet and are using condoms, consider the fact that you could be allergic to latex condoms.  If not, then...yes, there is the chance that sex could always be somewhat painful for you.  If he is well endowed and he is hitting your cervix, it actually gets bruised and will hurt for days afterwards.  Women's vaginas are obviously different lengths just like a man's penis and his large one might be short for your short canal.  My GYN could actually see my bruised cervix one time, lol.  As everyone else has said, different positions will help and you may have to explain to DH that he may not be able to penetrate quite as deep.  In my experience, however, if the fit is off it's always a bit uncomfortable no matter what.  If it's just the fact that everything is new and the fit is perfect then you should be feeling much better in the next few weeks for sure.
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  • I was just married in May and although I didn't remain a virgin until the wedding, my husband is the only one I've been with. We've been sexually active together for over a year and a half-and it's still painful for me. I was put on birth control before I was active due to ovarian cysts and since my hymen wasn't torn, my doctor told me until I was sexually active, then he would begin to do paps because he believes in the sanctity of a woman's virginity-so I understand where your doc was going with that. As for the pain, I know mine is a result of not being lubricated enough at times. Other times, I think the pain is just because I'm a petite person-and even that the vagina is a flexible muscle, discomfort can happen. I would just suggest letting your body heal some and try to lay off having sex if you're still sore because you will only irritate yourself more-causing more discomfort. Foreplay is always a plus so make sure you have plenty of that! HTH!
  • I thought you said you were on BC, right? I had MISERABLE sex with my husband for 3 years while I was on BC. I went to all kinds of sex therapists and tried every lube and foreplay technique imaginable, and sex was like <silently crying> painful. It felt like I was being torn apart every time. I went off birth control and within a few months I was like a completely different person when it came to my libido and actually feeling sex as it was meant to be felt.

     

    Not saying that this is necessarily your problem,  but if your pain continues for several months, I would consider getting off birth control pills. I spent way too much time thinking something was wrong with me.

  • Let me just say way to go for waiting! :) thats what my hubby and I did and though its painful at first it keeps getting better! I've found, since my hubby is a little large too, ask him not to go in so deep or you can work your way into different positions where he doesnt go in all the way. Think abotu it though, you've never had that much going in and out in your vagina ever...so any natural body reaction would be to be sore. Try to do as much foreplay as possible and then once he's in you can go pretty quickly and it doesnt reach that 10 min soreness point
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