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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Mom drama - WWCND?
Yeah, agreeing with this. Refusing to go to something she felt strongly about JUST to teach her mom a lesson would be weird. But this is a subject where Christin already feels manipulated, so it has to stop sometime. Why not now?
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
But hey, refusing to attend a service honoring dead grandparents
it's. not. a. service. honoring. dead. grandparents.
it's not a funeral, or a memorial- it's something the catholic church does at what, every single mass? someone will read her name. along with a whole slew of other names. that's it. nothing even remotely personal will be said about her. if christin wanted, she could have them do it again next week.
Three DIFFERENT earrings? I do declare!
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
Fine. it's.a.reading.of.names. It's still something that involves her dead grandparents. Surely, since her mom uses her grandparents all the time there might be a different opportunity to take this stand or a gift card to steal.
Yes, Christin's issue was her mom's approach. But you implied that now was not the time to push back against her mom's manipulation because it had to do with a religious ceremony, which for some reason was more disrespectful to object to than a guilt trip over something else.
I'm not even going to get into the last issue, since it is way too complicated to hash out on the Nest. This doesn't really sum up everything there is to say, but I didn't go to church on Easter and at dinner that night my dad refused to speak to me because of it. He was outside grilling and I went out to say hi and chat with him, about anything but church, and was told to go back inside and leave him alone. So yeah, I'm the paranoid pvssy in this scenario!
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
Nestthis. And how much honor is there in some "holy man" agreeing to put your loved ones' names on a list for money, so people can come listen to him read the list and put more money into a basket. When I die, I want my kids to put on their sluttiest bathing suits and have a car wash on the corner to honor my memory.
And I know this has very little to do with the original point of the post, but I guess it has as much relevance as gift cards do.
3 out of 4 dead babies agree! pepsi is better than coke! - EdithBouvierBeale
Lordy. Grow some balls and stop lurking. It's like stealing from the internet. Jesuschrist. -- AudreyHorne
I hate love and marriage. I got married so I could destroy these things from the inside. - NoisyPenguin
It's a good thing my circle of trust is as giant as my vagina. That only leaves a couple people out. - Cali
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
Hail Mary!
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
I get the gift card reference is to point out the passive-aggressive approaches Christin takes with her family, but I don't see how that has anything to do with this. If she doesn't go, she's not being passive-aggressive. She's actively taking the stand that she isn't going to just go because mommy says so.
No, you misunderstood me. My point is that now is not the time to push back because it so specifically mean to honor the dead grandparents. If her mom was all "you should attend mass on Sundays; your grandparents would want you to," I'd say no to that. If it was a town council meeting listing her grandparents as contributors to funding the local park and her mom wanted her to attend, I'd so go and push back later.
I'll go to a memorial if it's specifically for giftcardgate, but don't expect me to sit on a hard bench for an hour surrounded by old lady with huge hats just because some alleged child molester got paid to put Giftcardgate on his list of names to read off.
Okay, that was a lie. If you can find a priest to say giftcardgate among his list of the dearly departed, I'd doubletithe to see that.
3 out of 4 dead babies agree! pepsi is better than coke! - EdithBouvierBeale
Lordy. Grow some balls and stop lurking. It's like stealing from the internet. Jesuschrist. -- AudreyHorne
I hate love and marriage. I got married so I could destroy these things from the inside. - NoisyPenguin
It's a good thing my circle of trust is as giant as my vagina. That only leaves a couple people out. - Cali
If honoring the grandparents is a sacred thing, and also happens to be her mom's leverage of choice, where does it end? Let's say Christin wanted to spend all of Thanksgiving at her H's family's house and her mom said, "Thanksgiving was your grandma's favorite holiday, she would be so happy to know her family was all together on a day she loved the year she passed away. Plus it would mean a lot to me."
There is plenty of mileage to be had for her mom using this topic, and I don't see how giving in over one grandparents-related manipulation is any better or worse than another.
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
I see someone or something else outside the family publicly acknowledging the grandparents--be it a church or a town council--as a different situation than mom simply invoking the grandmother to get Christin to attend a common family get-together. In fact, the Thanksgiving example seems like a great occasion to say no, if you find that manipulative.
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
At this point, I wouldn't go simply because Fallin is angling so hard for you to go. Jesus. How many ways can this be dissected before everyone's eyes start bleeding.
The church itself isn't honoring them. You can get anyone's name added to the list for $25 or so. Does this mean if I pay to get the name of a deceased relative of yours mentioned at a church in STL, you will drive here to attend the Mass?
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
Only if you sprinkle in some of my mom's ashes.
It would be interesting to see if your views on this debate changed if you had an assh0le like me for a mom instead of the nice, normal one you have now.
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
So you're sitting around naked saying, "Elinor, Gertrude, Elizabeth, Margaret...."?
That's pretty weird Moo. Although I admire your commitment to internet addiction, bringing a laptop in the tub with you.
"The meek shall inherit the earth" isn't about children. It's about deer. We're all going to get messed the fuckup by a bunch of cloned super-deer.- samfish2bcrab
Sometimes I wonder if scientists have never seen a sci-fi movie before. "Oh yes, let's create a super species of deer. NOTHING COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG." I wonder if State Farm offers a Zombie Deer Attack policy. -CaliopeSpidrman