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TexasHarmony
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Clicky: In-Laws/House Buying
Re: Clicky: In-Laws/House Buying
Big fat zero.
Did they want me to buy a house or did they want to buy a house for me. There's a difference.
some input.
yes, a gift is a gift, but that is a huge freaking gift and entertaining some of their input is certainly gracious.
if i were going to run off and do-what-i-want and purposefully not take their opinions into account, accepting the gift wouldn't really be right, in my opinion.
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with certain people's in laws there's no way I would take the money, it would let them think they could hang it over my head forever.
I agree with almond. Also, unless they are living there why should the get to select things?
Can you give some for instances to see if I agree with them?
More info: You and your fiance have found a house, put in an offer, and the ILs insist on using their inspector. Inspection is fine except the a/c is not as efficient as it could be. The house is $30K below the $200K you've been given. You are supposed to close in less than a week and you've given notice at your current rental and have completely packed your house. You are leaving for a week long vacation in two weeks and your wedding is in late September.
You are 5 days from closing and ILs start giving you a hard time because the owners won't replace the a/c, but it still has a few years left and you are ok with it. Would you stand your ground that this is the house you are getting or would you start over and find something else?
Have they flat out said they won't pay? I'd have DH talk to his parents. however, I don't know if I could ever take that size of a gift from them to begin with.
Based on this - stand your ground. The A/C seems like a small thing - and it's not something like the location or foundation that would potentially ruin a sale later on (if the ILs keep the title - in which that is why I would say they would have some sort of say)
With all of those issues already popping up I would kindly decline. Can you imagine if that air conditioner broke the hell you would have to hear day in day out. No thanks.
I wish I had the balls to agree... but I don't know that I could easily walk away from a "free" 200K.
If a "Look, we're very, very grateful for the money and we appreciate your input, but we're fine with the state of AC. End of discussion," conversation doesn't kill the discussion, I'd be really worried about what comes next and the type of control/boundary issues that would come up later.
My dad is very much a 'strings attached' boundary issues kind of person. I see what my siblings go through with him. I do not envy your friends' position.
My initial response is in line with Jax.
With 30k to spare, they could put a new a/c unit in.
Sometimes IL's have more real estate purchasing experience and know that because of location, comparables, etc. it is not a wise investment.
If they cannot buy the house without the gift, they should try to persuade the ILs about the a/c. If they can't and are stuck on that house, they won't get it anyway.
If it is too much hassle to discuss in detail with the ILs they should turn down the gift and keep renting.
- Paula Deen to 104.1 KRBE's Producer Eric 9/17/2011
Usually I would say they get no input a gift is a gift. But in our personal situation my FIL is in a wheelchair so if they gifted us with that kind of money they would at least expect that the home was handicapped accessible and I would have no problem doing so.
In any other situation my answer would be different.
They are obligated to buy. If they walk away they could be sued and will lose their earnest money not to mention the cost of the option and inspections... IL's need to suck it up. They have a CONTRACT!!
if these inlaws are being snatches about an inefficient AC, my initial thoughts are:
a) the couple is relatively irresponsible with money and the inlaws fear they won't be able to pay electric bills with a crappy AC, nor will they be able to afford a new AC
b) the inlaws are very controlling and have some ulterior motive for them not purchasing that home
c) someone involved is a huge drama llama and we don't have all the info
d) the inlaws are of a different culture where stubbornness/bargaining is key and need a point to fixate on for the sellers
e) all or some of the above
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Adding: I'm making the assumption that they are out of option since close is 5 days away.
It is this one. Definitely not A and not D.
Brandi - there is a backup offer on the house for more than the asking price and the contract says the offer is contingent on the inspection. Does that matter?
But the inspection is done within the option period - that's what it's for, right?
WELL...friend just told me the reason the FIL is being a pain in the butt about it is because while the a/c is in working condition, the owner knows it is not as efficient as it could be and it is the principle of the matter. I would so tell the FIL to shove it if it were me.
I didn't read the responses, but I clicked special because I don't know that I would take the money.
However if we did, it is a gift so they don't get an opinion. But still...I don't think I could do it.
There is a time limit on the inspection (option period) if they are past that time frame and back out (even for something found in the inspection) they lose their earnest money... It should be clearly spelled out on pg 7 of the contact (if they are in Tx). When the option period is over, it's over...
Back up offer doesn't mean squat. The seller still gets to keep their EM if they violate the contract. It's consideration for their wasted time and efforts. However, the seller will only be the time between the 2 contracts, so the odds of a law suit are low. However, if there wasn't a back-up they could go after them for specific performance.
This!
Plus the air conditioning is a rather inexpensive thing to replace in the scheme of things. If they still have a quite a few thousand left over, what's the issue? Yes, you can try to get the home owner to replace it or at least give a credit of some sort, but why risk losing the house over something to easily fixed and doesn't have to be done NOW.
so you people are telling me that if someone gave you TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS to buy a home, you could look them in the eye and say "oh thank you, but we really don't care about your opinion... but again thank you for the gracious gift!"
you must have a much more politic-free life than me : )
what if i brought you a $50 dozen of cupcakes but asked for a small favor in return for the "gift"? would you sit there and eat them and still tell me no?
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It doesn't sound like they're "just" giving their opinion.
giving an opinion and picking the house are very different. i want to live in the house i picked out, not the one my MIL picked for me.
ageed