Anyone have any good crazy family/drama stories from the holidays?

Novemberrocks · December 2011

We were sitting shiva and the deli platter was two hours late so my h's uncle almost gave himself a stroke yelling at the restaurant manager on the phone. Ben's Kosher Deli is now dead to us. Miles now calls my sister "mommy". He's a Love the One You're With type of guy.

CaliopeSpidrman · December 2011

Novemberrocks:
Ben's Kosher Deli is now dead to us

I hope someone is sitting shiva for Ben's Kosher Deli.

wingedbride · December 2011

We are packing to leave LA, but the short of it is that we are leaving not on speaking terms with Mr. Winged's sister andim not sure there is any coming back from this visit. They've always been very close with no drama so this is completely put of nowhere and devastating.

buddhagouda · December 2011

Yikes, Winger. I'm so sorry

Novemberrocks · December 2011

Oh no Winged! Sorry the trip was so stressful.

wingedbride · December 2011

Thanks guys. I think it's hardest seeing him going through it although I feel the rage toward her as well for her actions.

WendyToo · December 2011

That sucks a lot wingading. I'm sorry.

However, you're quite the cocktease. Jerk.

CaliopeSpidrman · December 2011

I'm withholding my sympathy until you dish some dirt.

Vinny2008 · December 2011

WendyToo:

That sucks a lot wingading. I'm sorry.

However, you're quite the cocktease. Jerk.

This.

But seriously, I'm sorry dude.

wingedbride · December 2011

I know I am. Just to set the scene at beautiful Griffith observatory overlooking beautiful hazy Los Angeles. Imagine a total meltdown that includes a 6 year old yelling "mom says we ONLY EVER do things you want to do" All this of course is after we took them to Christmas lunch on the Queen Mary and got a luxury 2 bedroom suite on Hollywood and Vine. Apparently we should have just paid her car payment, turned he cell phone on and let the 6 year old choose all activities because he is perpetually bored at anything does. Oh also we drive 40 miles in the car with a millennium falcon larger than said 6 year old jammed into the space under mr winged's feet because he could go a day without it.

BobLoblaw · December 2011

Hmm, that just sounds like a bratty kid, nothing to cut someone out over.

Vinny2008 · December 2011

Well, except that the bratty kid is just repeating what the selfish, ungrateful parents have said in private.

wingedbride · December 2011

What Lindsay said. Although that was just the start, the teaser if you will. We were told only to speak to the 6 year old by her the rest of the visit.

lmydogally · December 2011

Oh winger, that sucks. I know how close they are/were. I do think she resents you guys a little since she struggles and is a single mom. It sounds like she was expressing feelings to her son when she should have kept those to her self.

WendyToo · December 2011

Vinny2008:
Well, except that the bratty kid is just repeating what the selfish, ungrateful parents have said in private.

I would normally see this point, except that six year olds aren't the most reliable interpreters. "I'm sorry son, but we can't stay here and play video games. They are our guests and that means we need to do the things they want to do too" can totally be repeated as "Mom said we only get to do what YOU want!" in the same way kids insist that their parents NEVER let them do anything fun.

Vinny2008 · December 2011

WendyToo:

Vinny2008:
Well, except that the bratty kid is just repeating what the selfish, ungrateful parents have said in private.

I would normally see this point, except that six year olds aren't the most reliable interpreters. "I'm sorry son, but we can't stay here and play video games. They are our guests and that means we need to do the things they want to do too" can totally be repeated as "Mom said we only get to do what YOU want!" in the same way kids insist that their parents NEVER let them do anything fun.

Sure, but knowing what I know about Winged, I doubt that she is cutting a family member out of her life because of the one comment from the kid.

WendyToo · December 2011

Vinny2008:
WendyToo:

Vinny2008:
Well, except that the bratty kid is just repeating what the selfish, ungrateful parents have said in private.

I would normally see this point, except that six year olds aren't the most reliable interpreters. "I'm sorry son, but we can't stay here and play video games. They are our guests and that means we need to do the things they want to do too" can totally be repeated as "Mom said we only get to do what YOU want!" in the same way kids insist that their parents NEVER let them do anything fun.

Sure, but knowing what I know about Winged, I doubt that she is cutting a family member out of her life because of the one comment from the kid.

Oh yeah, I was just talking in general terms. I'm sure that what was said after was what mattered.

wingedbride · December 2011

She confirmed it herself later. She told us we were obligated as family to support her and her son (who live with a family for 4 years now) while she is on welfare and jobless and refuses to job hunt. We owe her. And our trip was a waste of her time. Instead of flying to see her and doing stuff that bored her kid constantly (her words) we could have given her all the money we spent on the trip.

Vinny2008 · December 2011

wingedbride:
She confirmed it herself later. She told us we were obligated as family to support her and her son (who live with a family for 4 years now) while she is on welfare and jobless and refuses to job hunt. We owe her. And our trip was a waste of her time. Instead of flying to see her and doing stuff that bored her kid constantly (her words) we could have given her all the money we spent on the trip.

Indifferent

Um. Yeah. Yikes.

mashedpotato · December 2011

I don't get why you're complaining, she sounds lovely. Indifferent

Temp893353375007415 · December 2011

Winged that sounds horrible. I am so sorry. This must kill your H

lmydogally · December 2011

Oh my gawd, winger. What a horrible thing for her to say. Girl has some issues.

EmilyJo · December 2011

oh man, winger. sorry to hear.

FallinAgain · December 2011

That sucks. I'm sorry. If it is out of character behavior and they've been close in the past, maybe they can talk through it after tempers cool.

pdxmouse · December 2011

I'm sorry Winger. Hopefully when she works her way out of her mess, she'll pull her head out of her ass in the process.

Our Christmas itself was lovely; just us, quiet and happy.

Christmas Eve at my parents was as awful as I expected. My parents took Bug to the theatre for the afternoon, since I wasn't going to be able to prepare anything with Dimi underfoot they said it was okay if I brought my ingredients over and prepared it there (mashed potatoes and gravy, quick and easy). We got there, I said hi to my sister and she acted like I wasn't speaking. 5 minutes later she comes in and asks if dinner was ready yet, because her dish was going to be ruined if it had to "wait on selfish people." Then she announced that she was taking the dog for a long walk because she would rather "stab herself through the eye with a sword than have Xmas with you" while looking at my mother. I asked my mom what was going on "Oh, that's just your sister these days. I ignore her, she's working through her anger."

So we sit down to eat. My sister comes back and spends the meal clanging dishes around in the kitchen and swearing loudly to herself. My mom spends the meal talking about the latest "research" from "Doctor" Mercola and how woooonderful these new "compounds" her naturopath has her on make her feel. Occasionally she switches the subject to their plan to sell their house and move to Mexico City.

Then my sister (yes the anorexic one) has enrolled in pastry school to become a pastry chef, brought out the weirdest sweet potato pie I've seen and a not bad coconut cream. Then my dad comforts her from my "mean" mom and makes her apologize for some made-up hurt so we can open presents.

Buddy the Dog is still with us. The training routine they have him on involves growling at him when he misbehaves.

TSD · December 2011

Yeah Winged, there'd be no coming back from that for me. But, I'm cold like that. It sucks and it's devastating, especially that they were close. But, if she has that mentality, it's not likely to change. She obviously believes that...and that is some f'ed up skewed way of thinking that is inherent (in my opinion). Being gracious, not feeling entitled like people owe you a living, having ambition, etc, is something people usually have inside them. And vice versa. Usually they have people around who enable them so it just gets worse and worse and I'm not sure how it could change because they get used to how they live and people providing for them. I'm so disgusted at what she said about the money for your trip. There is Lanie face written all over that. X1000.

daria405 · December 2011

FluffyShoe:
My H is equally disgusted. He takes passive jabs at her about where things come from. They live in a different state - so, we visit every 2-3 months and she always has new and different toys for the kids to play with. He wants to openly confront her, but I am on the fence. I just take the crap she gives us and donate it to a local charity when we get home. Reverse the karma. I am donating the pleather 'isotoners' and sea otter puppet (?) she gave me for Xmas later today. She gave me ugly azz gloves last year too. If you're going to re-gift stolen goods, at least make it good stuff, right?

But it's an otter sea puppet! That sounds fun (for real, I'd probably like it, though maybe not the stolen variety).

wingedbride · December 2011

I hope things will change but I'm not sure they will. He is not angry just extremely hurt and there was never any yelling or "fighting" if that makes sense. And, the people who she has lived with for 4 years who support her have made it clear they resent us too. And since she lives with them, has no cell phone or money to pay phone bills I'm not sure how we will remain in contact. She's almost 50,recently decided her dream job is either cake decorating or bottle painting, refuses to work a real job, won't try to aggressively go after her dream jobs, got fired a month ago from a Mrs. Fields, is on welfare (yet drives a brand new SUV with 500 dollar a month payments and balloon at the end) which we told her to get rid of 3 years ago and she wouldn't but now hates us because we won't pay it off. She filed bankruptcy and is 70,000 in debt since then. Has survived off of money from inherited houses that have now all sild(they were destroyed in Katrina) so now she got welfare at least. She expects money from us. That's the whole thing. And with no more inheritance this is why it's broken down now. We have helped her before but she has no plans to work. We would be supporting her indefinitely 100%. Anything less than that is unacceptable to her or her "family" she lives with. So where do you go from there? What TSD said is right. You cannot give someone drive to do better for themselves.

TSD · December 2011

wingedbride:
I hope things will change but I'm not sure they will. He is not angry just extremely hurt and there was never any yelling or "fighting" if that makes sense. And, the people who she has lived with for 4 years who support her have made it clear they resent us too. And since she lives with them, has no cell phone or money to pay phone bills I'm not sure how we will remain in contact. She's almost 50,recently decided her dream job is either cake decorating or bottle painting, refuses to work a real job, won't try to aggressively go after her dream jobs, got fired a month ago from a Mrs. Fields, is on welfare (yet drives a brand new SUV with 500 dollar a month payments and balloon at the end) which we told her to get rid of 3 years ago and she wouldn't but now hates us because we won't pay it off. She filed bankruptcy and is 70,000 in debt since then. Has survived off of money from inherited houses that have now all sild(they were destroyed in Katrina) so now she got welfare at least. She expects money from us. That's the whole thing. And with no more inheritance this is why it's broken down now. We have helped her before but she has no plans to work. We would be supporting her indefinitely 100%. Anything less than that is unacceptable to her or her "family" she lives with. So where do you go from there? What TSD said is right. You cannot give someone drive to do better for themselves.

Well I think the most hurtful thing about it is that the venom only came once the money ran out...so she must have felt this way all along but didn't "need" his help then. She must've thought it would be a given that you'd just support her and when that wasn't the case, she's indignant & angry like it was owed. I didn't realize she was older- it sounded like a petulant child so I assumed young and foolish.

Someone that age isn't changing. I'm sorry but I'd bet on seeing actual pigs with wings first. Sure, I guess some people, like in fairy tales like the Grinch actually change but I don't know many IRL. Or any.

For you, I'd be extra pissed. You also have a child and one on the way. You both work, and you are in an emotionally demanding field where I dare say you probably work your ass off. The audacity that you'd just be expected to take from yours to support her is staggering. Sure, if she was short term down on her luck- fine. But she's looking for a permanent meal ticket/sugar daddy, etc. and feels entitled. Even on Melrose Place Sydney was sly and went about her mooching in a stealthy manipulative way- not just an outright F U. Well aside from sleeping with her sister's husband. But I digress.

TSD · December 2011

I have no family. I'm an orphan. That means I lost all the drama. Feel bad for me not for dead mom but for loss of interesting stories. I used to be Kramer and now all I am is J Peterman needing to buy stories. BUT when I go back to work, hopefully I'll quickly have new tales to tell.

The upside to no family, the best part, is no obligations whatsoever. No argument or guilting as to how to split time, no gifting, no difficulty staying on Jenny Craig during holiday time. And going to a quiet movie theater on Christmas.

Anyone have any good crazy family/drama stories from the holidays?

Re: Anyone have any good crazy family/drama stories from the holidays?

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