Garlic semen?? Is he cheating on me?

Pier1girl · March 2012

There is just so much wrong with this post, I don't know where to begin. But OP, you feel lucky that he shares money with you? His money is your money too- when you marry someone what's yours is theirs and vice versa. You are staying home with his child- would he pay someone $40/week to do that? I can't fathom that you have an allowance and that he won't "let" you get a credit card. He's not being "smart with his money", he's controlling you and you seem content to let him.

The lipgloss in the truck would bother me the most and the late night "jobs".

Bottom line, if you're happy OP then great. But you don't sound happy.

married2thebest · March 2012

You really need to think about what others have written. YOu should consider some counseling for yourself so that you can see how unfair your H is to you. You should not need an allowance. You should have access to the same money he does. It should go to pay for whatever you and your child need. You should have a credit card so you can develop your own credit history so when he runs off with his mistress you can actually live. What if you want to have $63 lunch like he had? OR are you just not deserving of this. YOur H is a manipulative controlling JERK.

You should protect yourself in case he really is cheating so that you can survive without him. Please tell us you won't stay with him if he is cheating because you are his wife!

harleygirl01 · March 2012

Mason&Mama:
TarponMonoxide:

I dunno. Just because you found one receipt for an Italian restaurant and his spunk is funky, I don't know if that equates fooling around.

If he is on the phone at odd odd times when you know it cannot possibly be a business matter -- this would be after 11 pm and the very wee hours of the morning -- then something is up.

If he secretive about his phone and who is on it, something is weird, yeah.

Sometimes he needs to make business calls after 11pm and even look at jobs late at night. He is usually gone for an hour or so, but that is because the jobs are not always local. He does this because a lot of clients work during the day, and the only time they can meet is at nighttime. I do not think the late phone calls are suspicious. The only other thing that I found odd was when I found lip gloss in his car a few weeks ago. He told me that it was one of his coworker's lip gloss. At first I was skeptical because it was another guy, but the lip gloss was clear, and maybe it was more of a chapstick? I don't know. That is the only questionable thing I can think of right now.I just have this strange suspicion that something is wrong, and I can't say why except for the "funky spunk" as you all pit it.

When I first read the beginning of this post, I thought, give the guy a break. But I have worked in construction most of my life and I have never, ever heard of a project manager having to meet with people at 11:00 pm. And if someone asked, odds are pretty high the answer would a good chuckle and an agreement for Saturday morning at best. The lip gloss would be an issue for me too. I never wear colors on my lips, all lip gloss is clear, and I think there is a big difference between lip gloss and carmex. I think you should talk to your hubby.

twokidsmom · March 2012

I know how you feel about feeling gunned down about something that you felt was off the original subject. It really does hurt when you wanted to get some honest and sincere thoughts on a different subject. But most of the women here (some are being very rude) are seeing something that is truly concerning.

If you are really okay with the 1950's, its his money and I am the wife i.e. property of the husband then this is the right marriage for you. (And by the way, some women still want that old fashioned marriage.) BUT, it just isnt the norm anymore. Sure, you work in the home so you dont really NEED the money other than an "allowance" but it is the larger concept that he is keeping you out of a very important factor in your livlyhood. PP was right, what if something happened and he died? Would you have any idea at all where he had accounts? How many accounts? How much was in those accounts? Does he invest? Does he has life insurance? How much life insurance? Does he have debts? How much debt? These few questions are just a very small sample of the questions you would have to answer VERY QUICKLY after his death. Sounds to me like you would have no idea even where to start for the answers. You need to know these things. And not just know, but you need to be on the accounts so if something happens, it is your account too.

My DH was also in construction and never did he have to go to a job site that late at night.

We really are trying to help you with your situation. Do I think he is cheating? Yes, I do. Too many things just dont add up. And frankly, if he was, he is very smart. You have no car, little money, no access to any of HIS records, so really he can pretty much do anything and not be caught.

I really do wish you the best! Good luck!!!!

thealphabride · March 2012

Based on the Lip Gloss being in his truck, on that alone, I would be worried. That coupled with the receipt would really make me worry.

Did you ask him who was in his truck? Do you know his co workers? Can you ask the co worker if they need the receipt back? I'd be asking who left the receipt in his truck? I would ask who left lip gloss in the truck.

I don't know of ANY construction workers that would ever have lip gloss in their possession much less cop to using it. Men with dry lips usually use chap stick or carmex.

TemptressDs · March 2012

Have you considered telling him it is OK if he is seeing someone else and that you would like to be in on it? If I was you I would take my allowance and buy him some mangos to make his taste extra sweet, then tell him you want to join in with the other woman and swap mouth fulls. This way nothing is going on behind your back and you'd really be pleasing your man.

nosoup4u · March 2012

This is the best MUD I've ever read! Good job, M&M.

jackandjlin · March 2012

Did you perform oral sex just so you could see what it tasted like?? I would never in a million years think to do that or probably even notice if it tasted like garlic or tuna! You are pretty clever for that one!